I get that a&e is busy, but was not expecting to be spoken to so rudely

[mitsicar]

Went to a&e tonight. I have a foreign object stuck in my ear. I did not know it was in there until someone looked last night before I left my house and said i should get it looked at. Wasn't able to go to a&e today as my son had his own medical appointment in another city that I have waited months for and we were in a hotel for last night. There was no way I was cancelling it for my own ailment.

The pain has got significantly worse. Have shooting pains into my jaw and cheek bone and my ear is making clicking noises. This is since about lunch time today. Went to a&e this evening and the triage nurse asked me how long it had been in my ear. I said I suspect a few weeks, but I thought I just had an earache and it went away after a while so thought it was gone. Got some new foam ear plugs last week (which obviously pushed the foreign body in further!) and am now suffering for it. I hadn't finished when she cut me off and said 'well I don't really understand why you have picked this evening to come to a&e' and told me I would be better off going to my GP. I am in some pain but ended up leaving because she just made me feel like I had done an awful thing by heading straight after my son's appointment. I spoke to 111 earlier in the day and they told me to go to a&e asap because I could risk my hearing and that whilst it isn't life threatening, it is both an accident and an emergency. I asked if I could wait until morning and they said no. This was the 111 dr not the triage staff. I have no idea if this is the correct advice.

AIBU to think I didn't do anything wrong? I told her a medical professional has looked at it (a friend of mine who is a dr of 30 years) and said it needs ent because of how far in it is and she actually rolled her eyes at me and said I should see an actual GP (I suspect by that she meant my own GP?) and that a&e were sending everyone to minor injuries and that cases like mine are the reason she now has a 6 hour waiting list.

Is this normal for a&e now? Is it so awful working there that being rude has just become the norm or do most people have a better bedside manner? I haven't been to a&e since I was a child and was really shocked by the way I was spoken to, after being advised to go there by 111 and a trusted friend who is a medical doctor (GP).

To add, she didn't look in my ear.

Would you have done anything different? Am I missing something?

@mitsicar, follow your GP's advice and ignore the idiots.

Yea, the idiots who are still arguing and saying OP was wrong to go to A+E 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ They walk among us.

No point asking on here OP, the NHS is sacred and how dare you go to seek treatment in a first world country and not expected to be treated like dirt.

I’m trained in microsuction for wax removal as part of my job role. I have an extended scope of practice which includes being able to remove hearing aid domes, filters and wax traps. That’s it, I cannot remove any other foreign body. Our local referral policy dictates that we send patients presenting with a foreign body to A+E or Urgent Care for removal. So those saying you were in the wrong place are absolutely incorrect.

My mum suddenly lost the use of her legs and they didn't give a shit.

Gave her a muscle relaxant and sent her home.

We went back the next day. I took no shit. I was very polite, at all times, but ...reader, understand when I say I took zero shit.

Our local A and e filters people into 3 depts...real emergency, the gp and the minor injuries unit, but you have to join one queue at the start. dont see why you werent moved to minor injuries dept.

Your mum made the cardinal mistake of being a woman wanting healthcare. That’s what so much of this boils down to. If they can’t blame it on anxiety then they’ll blame it on hormones. It’s like being back in the 1800s.

Good on you for advocating for your mum. I was the same and went through the entire complaints procedure, and it resulted in the triage nurse in question being sent for additional training because it turned out this hadn’t been the first time he’d rolled his eyes at a woman in distress.

That's appalling!
I'm in NI and the A&E wait times are bad. I have a friend with hydrocephalus and the last time her shunt blocked she left A&E after sitting there in agony for 18 hours. It's barbaric. At that point she thought she'd die if she left but didn't care anymore. Thankfully she was seen quicker the next day because she lost feeling down her left side.

Not all ruptured eardrums heal by themselves. When it doesn't heal it needs surgery which comes with a lot of risks and doesn't always work. Far better to try and prevent a rupture in the first place

The foreign body in your ear is deep, from what you have said in your post and there could be swelling which is affecting the nerves in your jaw and an infection may be starting so I suggest you seek out a local walk in clinic who may be able to treat you.

You need to email PALS ( patient advice and liason service) at the hospital where this incident occurred and remember to give them the date and time you were triaged, so they can identify the member of staff who was rude to you because action needs to be be taken against her as her conduct is absalutely atrocious. PALS will speak to the senior members of the A&E dept and feedback wil be given to her.

Hi op, sorry you had a bad experience. A&E sister here, and you would need to go to A&E for ENT referral. We have an ENT daily clinic within ED but only 9-5 so I would have triaged you and sent you home to return the next morning for ENT. Your GP can’t manage that. Minor injuries could if it had just happened but after a few weeks being in situ you need ENT xx

Why?
If you went to A+E/Minor Injuries/Urgent Care you'd be sent to x-ray then and there.
A referral from your GP would take ages.

It was a few hours after when she finally got home and still open but left me with impression if x-ray was ever needed our GP wouldn't be correct place. MIL in another part of UK painfull getting worse knee joint GP visists and was told she need an x-ray this was a problem that had been gettong worse over 18 months - had to present herself at minor injuries and wait for x-ray as her GP didn't book x-rays either.

IME how NHS operates varies round the country - GP who are independent enties all operate differently under different health boards.

We've had people kick off when ambulanced have been call entirely appropriately for elderly relatives - because people think they know better or "common" sense tells them it wasn't neccssary or insist the system works a way it doesn't becuase they think it should or does in their area.

OP probably klciking herslef for not seeing GP earlier - and parents do deprioritise themsleves especailly with sick kids - but with a deteriorating condition seeking medical advice as soon as possible was entirely appropriate action. All the made up scenarios in the world or 20/20 hindsight do not change that.

She didn't know she had something in her ear until her friend saw it though - she went when she knew.

Glad you are now going to A&E (again!), hope they get it sorted quickly and there is no permanent damage.
Everyone saying that this is not for A&E/minor injuries is wrong. Even an emergency ENT referral would take weeks and as you've now found out, the longer it is left, the more damage that may be done. You followed all the correct steps in ringing 111 first and following their advice, the only things you did wrong were not going a bit sooner (although I completely understand, having waited over a year for many specialist appointments for my child, I'd not risk missing them either!) and then leaving after the triage nurse was rude.
Personally I'd consider speaking to PALs about your experience, as the advice this nurse gave you was incorrect and clearly she made you feel uncomfortable.

You were in the right place, just be more assertive next time

Some batshit responses, and opinions on here.

YANBU at all @mitsicar Do people actually know what A & E stands for?

ACCIDENT

AND

EMERGENCY!

It's for emergencies, and accidents!!

It's not just for people who have an arm hanging off, or who have been in a car crash. It's for accidents too.

You have your hearing at risk OP, you needed to be seen, and that nurse was rude af! Go back. You have every right to be seen.

I agree with the posters saying that some nurses are not kind and caring at all, and I do wonder why they're in the job. When I was in hospital for 2 nights/3 days several years ago for something (won't say what) they were quite rude to me. They rolled their eyes and mocked me, and I could hear them laughing at me behind my back. Mostly in their 20s and early 30s they were, and I felt so upset and angry. I was very vulnerable and I felt really down and sad that they were being unkind.

I hated being there, and discharged myself around 2-3 days before I should have. I told my GP why. I said 'the nurses were rude, and I was ignored a lot, and not treated very well.' Seriously, I'll have to be unconscious before I will go and stay in hospital again.

When my parents and grandparents were ill and in hospital pre 21st century, the nurses seems soooo much lovelier and kinder then. People would take flowers and chocolates and various other gifts in for them to thank them for how they'd looked after them. They were a different breed then. Lovely and kind.

Not saying ALL nurses are unkind and rude now by the way, but many more are now compared to when I was much younger (pre 21st century...)

Sorry your pain has increased. I really hope that you are taken seriously this time and you get the treatment you need

I do hope you make a complaint OP, when you're feeling up to it. That nurse needs some extra training on how to treat patients, dread to think what might happen if she spoke like that to someone with a potentially life threatening condition (for instance a woman having a heart attack that presents like indigestion pain)

I once had to complain about a doctor who refused to prescribe me painkillers, instead saying young people need to learn to cope with pain. I ended up going to A&E in agony to get pain relief and the doctor there told me to complain, so I did and I was told she received extra training on how to treat patients (which she definitely needed, she was notorious in my town for poor bedside manner)

Some people are good at and/or well suited to their jobs. Some aren’t. The NHS is no different. Hope you get sorted OP.

No it wouldn't. If they suspect you have a broken bone, they'll send you in right away. It takes about 3 clicks of a mouse to set that up.

I think you were absolutely right to go to A&E, and the nurse was both rude and negligent, as you are now finding. I really hope you have a better experience today and feel better soon.

Surely any audiologist who does microsuction, could easily remove this?

I’m with the a+e nurse, I don’t think it’s okay that she was rude but there’s no need to go to a+e for something that isn’t an emergency and that has been there for weeks. If you survived the past few weeks you’ll be fine for another day or two while you wait to see your GP. Unfortunately it’s people like you who cause massive waiting times in a+e for issues that can be resolved elsewhere if you’re willing to wait.

Our GP doesn't refer for X-ray - they tell you to go to a and e