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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be pissed off with my inappropriate dentist.

249 replies

MurkyMo · 31/07/2026 12:29

I asked my private dentist for a referral letter to a specialist as I have longstanding pain from a tooth that's had a lot of work done. I think the filling is bad or the tooth has a micro fracture, pain started the day after it was done. Decay was left inside and then I ended up with root canal treatment. Then a second RCT. My new dentist thinks there's nothing wrong with the tooth hence my move to an endodontist. But that's not the problem, the problem is the referral letter he wrote.

I gave him a document with a diary of my symptoms and treatments thinking it might help him find the problem and he says about it "tellingly, she references her own autism in it." Tellingly???? wtf?!

He says "I am not convinced that this is a dental problem, but appreciate that her dental fixation might be provoking a response in an already sensitised area"

Fixation??? WTF???? He's not a psychologist, why is he putting that in a referral letter to an endodontist. Surely it should be a clinical letter simply pointing out my symptoms and his clinical findings, not some amateur psychological assessment of me that dismisses my symptoms and alludes to my autism being part of the problem.

Any dental or medical professionals think this is off??

And what will the endodontist make of it?

I'm raging!

OP posts:
whereswilson · 02/08/2026 05:51

The "tellingly" and "dental fixation" are inappropriate and judgemental. I'd be shocked to receive that in a referral letter.

KatiePricesKnickers · 02/08/2026 07:10

emanresu3 · 01/08/2026 21:32

Just go for an extraction. Everyone I know who has had root canal treatment has been back and forth afterwards.

Yep. I had the whole journey of treatment costing a fortune and never curing the issue before getting an extraction then implant.
It’s very common.
Next time a dentist mentions RCT I’m going straight for the extraction.

Viviennemary · 02/08/2026 07:32

Sounds to me like he is saying you are imagining the pain. Get a different dentist.

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 07:35

Google , dental fixation , it is a technical term to describe dental procedures . He is not implying you are fixated on your dental work. Sometimes we can all misinterpret written accounts of things , I find texts especially , can be easily misconstrued and I don’t have autism.

Dexternight · 02/08/2026 07:35

Get a new dentist and stop handing them your diary.

MurkyMo · 02/08/2026 08:55

Nousernameideaaga · 01/08/2026 23:14

No, you are wrong

Can you show me some evidence ?

OP posts:
BlackRowan · 02/08/2026 09:44

Brackenandbrave · 01/08/2026 19:50

Sometimes root canal treatments fail. It’s usually not the fault of the dentist. It can be extremely tricky and complicated. There may be a micro fracture, a hidden canal that cannot easily be accessed, a sclerosed root… all sorts. Actually the only way really at this point in the OP’s case is to get it looked at by a specialist. Perhaps they can take a ct scan which might show up something that a traditional radiograph won’t.
honestly if you can’t get to the bottom of it, it might be worth just extracting and moving on.

when I would write a referral letter to a specialist I include an overview of the patient’s social, dental and medical history. An Autism diagnosis is relevant. At the very least it is worth a conversation with the patient as to how best to approach treatment.

i once had an absolute mare with a patient who had failed to disclose her diagnosis. If I had known I would have handled things better. Her dentist had left the practice so she was moved to a colleagues list. She went crazy about this. ( we found out later that she cannot handle change well, but we obviously did not know this at the time)
She Was really angry. When she calmed down and sat in the chair and I was called in to give a second opinion, and ( with consent) started probing around her tooth. She hit the roof again and started getting really upset because she “didn’t appreciate being prodded”

I was absolutely baffled, and the torrent of abuse and unreasonable behaviour that was fired in my direction made me ask her to leave the practice.
She later stated her diagnosis ( when making a complaint).

regardless, she was pretty rude, but I think in hindsight, if I had been made aware of her autism, I might have handled things differently.

dentists do actually get training in behavioural sciences, communication skills, equality, diversity and neurodiversity. But we aren’t mind readers.We are trained in techniques and tactics to help support individuals. We CANNOT diagnose this though, and we can certainly not suggest to a referring specialist that Autism is the reason for pain. That is very wrong.

I would have kept that letter factual, but included a full Medical history, and waited for a response.

here’s a thought though… what if the Endo specialist investigates, finds no dental concerns. What conclusion would he reach, or be qualified or “allowed” to reach?

That’s just not true. Sometimes it’s not the dentist’s fault but very often it is. Unfortunately British dentists are famously shit with root canal work

BlackRowan · 02/08/2026 09:44

emanresu3 · 01/08/2026 21:32

Just go for an extraction. Everyone I know who has had root canal treatment has been back and forth afterwards.

That’s because the dentists were shit

Emilia321 · 02/08/2026 09:46

As a Dentist I would not have written it like that. I would have kept to the clinical findings from my assessment and mentioned them in a letter requesting a second opinion and possible treatment. However, I would include a provisional diagnosis if I thought I knew what the problem potentially could be. It is normal for us to include all relevant medical conditions and medications. But again I would simply list them in the referral letter so the Endodontist is aware of your medical history.

PaddlerRock · 02/08/2026 09:59

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 07:35

Google , dental fixation , it is a technical term to describe dental procedures . He is not implying you are fixated on your dental work. Sometimes we can all misinterpret written accounts of things , I find texts especially , can be easily misconstrued and I don’t have autism.

@Loopylambs a root canal is not a dental fixation.

MurkyMo · 02/08/2026 10:08

KatiePricesKnickers · 02/08/2026 07:10

Yep. I had the whole journey of treatment costing a fortune and never curing the issue before getting an extraction then implant.
It’s very common.
Next time a dentist mentions RCT I’m going straight for the extraction.

Well I think it's always best to save a tooth where possible. I've a RCT molar, it was done over 30 years ago and it's never given me any trouble at all. That was done by a general dentist.

OP posts:
MurkyMo · 02/08/2026 10:14

JJWT · 01/08/2026 18:06

Dental fixation means tooth stabilisation after trauma. I think you might have misunderstood the letter.

I did not misunderstand anything.

From teh web,.... A dental fixation is the process of securely attaching or stabilizing a dental structure, teeth, or prostheses using permanent methods like screws, splints, or cements. It commonly refers to holding injured teeth in place, anchoring jaw fractures, or permanently securing artificial teeth to implants.

So NOT fillings or root canal treatments. Please stop misinterpreting fixation, we all know what he meant

OP posts:
BizzyLizzyandLittleMo · 02/08/2026 10:16

HollyhocksandPeons · 31/07/2026 12:48

The cult-like worship of doctors and dentists allows them to do that. I would go back and demand the letter is re-written and also say 'you are not QUALIFIED to opine on my mental health'. Stand up for yourself, for goodness sake!

This!

I can’t believe the number of posters who feel you are being unreasonable. There is no way the dentist should opine in the way they have done. It’s shocking and I would demand it be rewritten and this section omitted. The dentist just needs to describe your symptoms in the letter and that’s all.

And of course autism is relevant as you may need additional support/adjustments so giving them a heads up is sensible.
Also you have every right to know what has been written about you that’s why the NHS always gives you the option of receiving copies of letters about you.
I hope you get your issue sorted out and I would change dentists if I were you.

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 10:26

PaddlerRock · 02/08/2026 09:59

@Loopylambs a root canal is not a dental fixation.

It can be , if the tooth is severely damaged . Google it . I have one , that’s how I know 🙄

Brackenandbrave · 02/08/2026 10:31

BlackRowan · 02/08/2026 09:44

That’s just not true. Sometimes it’s not the dentist’s fault but very often it is. Unfortunately British dentists are famously shit with root canal work

If you are absolutely wanting to be entirely pedantic with this one, I would like to add that it is absolutely not the dentists fault that the tooth required treatment in the first place. People do need to take responsibility for their own oral health.

as I said, root treatment is tricky, expensive, time consuming and hard to get right. Technology is improving, CBCT imaging, better materials, microscopes and Loupes definitely help prognosis, but there is still an element of failure, especially in a root treatment that is attempted in general practice, where quite often the practitioners do not have access to the specialist equipment. Hence why certain cases need referral to specialists.
even then, sometimes a tooth is just not able to be saved.

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 10:38

MurkyMo · 02/08/2026 10:14

I did not misunderstand anything.

From teh web,.... A dental fixation is the process of securely attaching or stabilizing a dental structure, teeth, or prostheses using permanent methods like screws, splints, or cements. It commonly refers to holding injured teeth in place, anchoring jaw fractures, or permanently securing artificial teeth to implants.

So NOT fillings or root canal treatments. Please stop misinterpreting fixation, we all know what he meant

I have one myself , I had a dental fixation on a RCT . It meant the tooth was badly damaged and needed extra support .

AIBU to be pissed off with my inappropriate dentist.
PaddlerRock · 02/08/2026 12:54

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 10:38

I have one myself , I had a dental fixation on a RCT . It meant the tooth was badly damaged and needed extra support .

a root canal and a dental fixation are two different things!

Brackenandbrave · 02/08/2026 14:47

speaking as a dentist, the technical use of the term “dental fixation” isn’t massively common.

if a tooth requires extra support, I would generally describe it in terms of the actual measure applied as a “fixation”. That could be a post, a pin, an inlay, inlay, crown, bonded composite.

I’ve interpreted that the referral implies the “dental fixation” is psychological.

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 14:49

PaddlerRock · 02/08/2026 12:54

a root canal and a dental fixation are two different things!

Scroll up one message to the screenshot or would you like me to send my dental x rays ? 😂 I have a dental fixation in a root canal .

PaddlerRock · 02/08/2026 14:53

Loopylambs · 02/08/2026 14:49

Scroll up one message to the screenshot or would you like me to send my dental x rays ? 😂 I have a dental fixation in a root canal .

Yes. I get that. A dental fixation is NOT a root canal. You have a fixation IN a root canal. Am I going nuts here?

Dorsetisbeautiful · 02/08/2026 15:46

Medical misogyny at its finest. I get it all the time, sorry it happened to you too.

malloryknox123 · 02/08/2026 16:01

He wouldn’t have referenced autism if you hadn’t. How is it relevant to your dental treatment?

you’re claiming to know more about dentistry your qualified dentist…

Stompythedinosaur · 02/08/2026 17:15

"Tellingly" is extremely judgemental and I'd complain about that to the practice manager. Their code of conduct requires anti-discriminatory practice. I would ask for an apology and for the letting to be rescinded and rewritten.

The dentist could have stated "the patient reports x but my examination concludes y" if he wanted to say he disagreed with your view. There's no excuse for speaking in the way they have.

PaddlerRock · 02/08/2026 17:29

malloryknox123 · 02/08/2026 16:01

He wouldn’t have referenced autism if you hadn’t. How is it relevant to your dental treatment?

you’re claiming to know more about dentistry your qualified dentist…

This is such an odd take.

Every time I go to my dentist they ask about any health conditions and any medications I am on. They need your full health picture, in case something is relevant or any allergy/interaction risks.

Shewhoshallnotbenamed91 · 02/08/2026 17:45

"Dental Fixation" could well mean the area in which has already been "restored"