Wow, this is like me.
I was given antidepressants at age 12 after a tough childhood and 21 years later I’ve never been able to come off them.
My younger brother and sister both have ADHD, so does my Father and my Uncle.
I feel like I don’t “belong” anywhere if that makes sense, even though I’ve had the same friendship group since I was in school and married my first ever boyfriend (and love of my life, met at 13, married at 21).
I still have a sense of not belonging, like I’m an imposter in my own life, like I don’t fit in even though I do. It’s the weirdest thing. I have never held down a job (luckily we have our own business so have worked for 6 years for that but feels different as it’s ours) before that I would leave a job within 7/8 months. I procrastinate a LOT. I’m disorganised and lose my car keys/phone/other important items daily. When I say lose I mean I forget where I put it then find it an hour later. I’m late everywhere. I interrupt but I hate doing it, it’s like I can’t help myself, I often find myself daydreaming when somebody’s talking to me and only hear half of what they’ve said.
I’m reckless when it comes to money, I don’t think about consequences until after I’ve already spent.
I have a deep feeling of restlessness all of the time, I’m exhausted being me basically.
Anyway, I have now been diagnosed with ADHD and OCD and hopefully will have a plan soon regarding meds/therapies.