Partners nights out

[Yourejusthappytobehere]

Not sure if I’m being the arse here or they are.

my partner works away 1 week a month. The last time they were away they had a night out with a former colleague, drinking until midnight. Fine, they often have nights out with friends or colleagues while away.

they’ve been messaging this former colleague a fair bit over the last 3 weeks.

this week they’re working away again. They were out drinking with this person last night until midnight, and again tonight for dinner. Just them.

i was unhappy when they told me this. They’ve been very quiet all week, and tonight not a single message saying what they were doing until they got back to the hotel around 11.30 and I asked who they’d been out with.
im being told im wrong to think its odd to go out for dinner and drinks 1:1 with someone 2 nights in a row.

am I being off or are they?

Yeah Id not be cool with it 2 nights in a row especially as its drinking and late nights...daytime coffee would feel more chilled. But everyone's boundaries are different.

Also just saying they know they’re in the wrong or they would not have stopped messaging. If they genuinely thought it was a non issue they’d be open about it

You either trust them or you don't.. sounds like you don't.

To be clear, I'm not trying to be a cool wife but personal experience and many MANY years of dwelling on the Relationshops board, if they want to cheat, they will, regardless of;

• if they're happy at home
• if they're having regular sex with you
• if there are children
• if they've said 'they never will'
• if theres no time in their day to cheat and they never go anywhere
• if they've been cheated on previously...

If they want to, they will (and that goes for either sex too) so you have to decide whether you believe them. And if you don't, whether it's a dealbreaker for you!

To be fair to your husband if there was something going on would t he lie about it. The fact he is telling you who he is with should reassure you nothing is going on

I trust my DH but wouldn’t be happy with this OP. It might be entirely innocent but it feels like a slippery slope into at least an emotional affair.

how often do the two of you manage to get out for dinner and late night drinks on your own? That might help him to gain some perspective