Friend thieves

[Inbetweenie993]

Is it just me? Experience... lots of friends/ acquaintance s
New person arrives. Seems to set about being fabulous friend to people I have introduced them to. This person remembers EVERYTHING! Anniversaries that pass me by... card - sympathy on anniversary of your cat dying - really! Said person is soon attentive, drives a wedge. I can't compete! I am just me - no way can I be the overtly thoughtful person that they are! Gradually friendships eroded. Person closer to my friends now. AIBU? Can you 'steal' friends by superficial gestures? Is it me????

They're not superficial gestures, though. They are gestures that show care, thoughtfulness and that what's being mentioned is being listened to. And yes, those are absolutely qualities good, close friends have.

I once had someone 'so thoughtful!' like that turn out to be a bit of psycho who caused mayhem in my life for a while.

She used cards with thoughtful messages, thoughtfully remembering birthdays, occasions, cards for this, that, and the other to insert herself into my family life and very quickly began to manipulate me into giving her what she wanted in such a way that I felt cornered, unable to say no without looking like a horrible person. Until I did, and she went bonkers and started phoning me non stop, turning up at my house crying etc. It was bizarre, and I later found out I wasn't her first target.

So I'm always a bit wary of these types!