AIBU to expect someone with a dog to give way?

[Goatscheese21]

Was walking into town with my 4 mo strapped to my chest in the carrier. Handbag on one shoulder and keeping his sunhat on with one hand (irrelevant details but just setting the scene).

The path is extremely narrow so only one person going each direction can walk on it. A woman with a chihuahua was walking down the path as I was walking towards her direction….

i didn’t step into the road with traffic because I have a baby strapped to me and assumed she was going to let me pass as she was in the less vulnerable position. But this was not the case and she keeps walking and says to me ‘You could’ve let me pass’… to which I reply ‘so could you, I’m the one with a tiny baby… I don’t want to step into the road’

she muttered something and that was that but it really irked me. I always give way to people who are more ‘vulnerable’ ie an elderly person, someone with a pram, carrying a baby etc.

Was I wrong? I wasn’t making a point by NOT giving her way, and maybe I should’ve stepped to the road but I thought it was common knowledge / courtesy that people give way to people with babies. She wasn’t old, just had a small dog with her on a lead and the fact she actually said something about it, to a woman with a baby shocked me even more

i’m sure the dog is her world but… really??

I move over if easy to do so and hope others to do the same. I wouldn't deliberately not move over because I had a baby and so ranked myself more important than the other person

You presented as one person as a whole.

She presented as one person, a wire and an animal.

It's in your best interest just to wait.

I don't care actually.

You're not moving for a dog, you're moving because it's the safest option. You may be cold enough to not care about a dog but surely you care about the driver that hits the dog? Or the driver that swerves to avoid the dog and hits another car?

The best trained dog in the world would be unpredicatable if you walked them in traffic. A baby strapped to it's parent is totally predictable.

It is utterly ridiculous to expect a dog to walk in the road. Grown ups would just acknowledge the problem and wait/hang back until it was safe enough for either one to carry on but it seems that grown ups are not always grown up.

I've got both. Well, not a baby anymore but he was a few years ago and I used a baby carrier. If it was a baby in a pram or a walking child it would probably be easier for the dog owner to step aside. A baby strapped to an adult is just as easy as an adult alone stepping to one side

If it's safe for you to step into the road then I fail to see what having a 'tiny baby' has to do with anything.

The road is either safe at the point of entry or it isn't 🤷‍♂️

Having already been hit once in my life by a car as a pedestrian, I am not putting myself in the position that it could happen again so an animal can stay on the pavement.

I will wait for them to go past, or the owner can move on to the road if they want to.

i am not putting myself at risk for a dog.

You are aware the dog comes with a human, right?

Why should she move? You're not more important just because you chose to have a baby. Christ, entitled much? Your child isn't more important than anything to anyone but you.

Her dog would have had to walk in the road, your baby didn’t. Had she been carrying the dog, you would be in the same situation. It’s not about who is more vulnerable or whose life is worth more (of course it’s a baby over a dog) but it boils down to you being able to take your two legs in to the road for three seconds or her having to take six legs.

But yes I would have stepped in the road to let her pass, obviously checking it was clear to do that.

As someone who has had babies (now adults), there is a human instinct that makes you feel your child always comes first, it is evolutionary IMO, hence the precious first born threads. As those children grow and become more independent it dilutes until you reach a point where new mothers irritate you with their entitlement.

I also walk DS's dog, and there are lots of dog owners that assume their dog is more important then you or anyone else, I have had rows with other dog owners who expect me to step into the road whilst they with their reactive hounds take priority on the pavement because I should know that their dog will lunge and bark if I pass with the dopey labrador.

Don't lose sleep OP, we are all different. I have had a lovely walk on the moors today with lots of dog walkers, and young children, and every single one, including me was respectful of each other to the point it was "you go first" "no you go, I insist" - It was lovely. The world is a better place without any entitlement.

The woman with the dog was being unreasonable because she had a clear view of any oncoming traffic and she also made a confrontational comment. We have a footpath like this near my house and any time I run into anyone walking towards me on it it’s always the person who has the clear view of oncoming traffic who steps out. If the person with the view doesn’t step out both people are then forced to stop anyway. The alternative would be that you’re expecting the other person to do a 180 turn to check for traffic, which would involve them stopping and blocking the pavement anyway surely?

Yes. This. I’d expect whoever was walking that way to move as that’s safest for everyone.

The person facing the oncoming traffic should step into the road if someone really needs to do so. They have a clear view of anything coming so are much better able to determine if it’s safe. But if someone just needs to stop to the side of the pavement there’s absolutely no reason why you should have priority just because you have a baby!

I don't think she 'should' have stepped into the road. Neither 'should' you have. She was unreasonable to make a comment. Is it possible she could see an expression on your face that made it clear you thought she should have moved out of your way? Either way, she should have just left it, but I wouldn't step into the road if I thought it was unsafe, regardless of anyone's baby or dog situation. Surely there was a way for both of you to avoid that, even if it meant stopping and standing still at one side for a minute.

Very sensible view.

If everyone kept left on paths conflicts wouldn't arise. And you are facing the oncoming traffic then too (in most cases). And if a path is very narrow I'd suggest it's not a clever idea to go down there with a dog (or a double buggy) if there's an easily accessible wider alternative.

I agree with the hierarchy above, though I walk faster than some runners so I wouldn't necessarily put walkers ahead of runners.

Also, I asked this before but why do people let their dogs go between them and me. Surely you go between your dog and an oncoming person?

Babies are a damn sight more important than people's four legged fashion accessories!

The woman you encountered sounded like my mum 😂

Some dogs are like babies to their owners. But I've had people with dogs try to force my primary school aged children next to the road so their dog could stay near the wall. I disagree with it but then again they probably don't give a shit about my kids and love their dog. Don't lose sleep over it

Not at all! Lots of people are calling me ‘entitled’ but I’m truly not (of course only people that know me will testify) which is why I was taken aback at her comment because I wouldn’t dare say anything like that - I just felt she was entitled for making a comment when she could see I was in a situation similar to her but with a baby.

Do I think babies are more important than dogs? Yes. It doesn’t matter if it’s my baby or Hitler’s baby - a baby is a baby and it has nothing to do with hierarchy, it’s just more a less instinctive. But I wasn’t walking like I was owning the small pavement just because I have one.

Anyway, it didn’t ruin my day I just thought I’d ask people’s views and it’s interesting to see difference in opinion. I’ve concluded myself that I don’t think I was being unreasonable, she was facing oncoming traffic… I felt like stepping out, looking to my right just wasn’t worth the risk of getting hit by a car (albeit small) and had she not said anything I wouldn’t have thought twice about the exchange.

To their parents, yes. Not to anyone else. My responsibility is to my own children and animals. Animals aren't accessories. They are living creatures with just as much right to occupy space as humans.

Her baby doesn't give her right of way over anyone else. If she didn't want to step into the road, she could have hung back, rather than barge her way through.

Oh look, another thread that’s brought out the number haters of dogs

You’re talking rubbish, you don’t put the dog on the road side as they’re re less predictable so you want them on the inside.

I’ve got a ( big) dog and always stand to one side to let anyone pass whether they have a baby/ child /dog / whatever but I do expect a thank you or an acknowledgment, a smile or nod will do, much the same as if I gave way to you whilst driving , & I’ll get the hump if I don’t get it 🤣 ,so then I’ll shout something like no worries you’re very welcome!

Sorry, you are wrong. A classic entitled parent/mum. As a PP said earlier, you have a child strapped to you so it’s much easier to stop /navigate. Whereas it’s a lot more challenging with a dog in tow. They have just as much right as you do.

What is a ’classic’ and entitled parent?

It’s actually not all that easy, I’m 5ft and my baby is as long as my torso, it’s very hot and so stepping into oncoming traffic and turning to my right to see if it’s clear seemed a bit more effort / risky for her to walk with her little dog.

I wish I hadn’t asked! People are so so mean calling me entitled when they literally don’t know me but I guess it’s my fault for posting on the internet. Can people not give their opinion without assuming someone’s personality?:

thanks to everyone who’s replied (whether you agree or not) with kindness!

No need for any further comments :)

People aren’t assuming that you’re entitled, you’ve shown that you are by your posts.

It must be amazing to be the only person in the world who has ever had a baby. Congratulations!