AIBU to be angry about another misleading programme on Romany Gypsies?

[IronEverything]

I just can't believe this is happening again.

Some of you may remember the show called "my big fat gypsy wedding" on channel 4 from years ago. It did absolutely awful damage to my community (Romany gypsy). It was complete and utter trash and majority of those featured weren't even gypsies.

Well they're at it again.

They are advertising a new show, something along the lines of "secret lives of gypsy wives". Yet the star of the show is a social media influencer (?) named Trewly Precious who is neither of those things. I think her father was a gypsy but she wasn't raised in the community and she isn't married.

Why are they doing this to us? There are so many amazing gypsy women who could have shown what it's really like to be a modern day gypsy. Yet they have once again chosen entertainment value over the reputation of a community who are already marginalised and hated by a large portion of the public. AIBU to be so angry about this?

As a romani woman myself, I think the root cause is ignorance and lack of education. We are all tarred with the same brush and nobody knows the difference between an Irish traveller, British traveller or Romani Gypsy , so we've all been lumped together . And a tv show would rather get views by pushing a stereotype

Dont apologise, im a Romani. You're correct. There is Irish traveller, British Traveller/Gypsy. Then Romani Gypsy. Romani have ethnic minority status, the British traveller do not

That’s not correct. Romany Gypsies and Irish Travellers are recognised ethnic groups under equality law, and in Scotland, Scottish Gypsy/Travellers are also legally recognised.

They are legally recognised for different reasons. The romani are from India, the Scottish and Irish are indigenous to those countries

Can you write in to Louis Theroux or someone to do a documentary on your family?

OK so there’s English gypsy which is another term for Romani. Then Irish and Scottish /Welsh (British) Travellers and British Showmen. Which are all separate groups.

And thats it?

Their origins are different, but that’s exactly why they’re recognised as separate ethnic groups. Irish Travellers and Scottish Gypsy/Travellers have their own distinct history, culture, customs and languages, just as Romany Gypsies do. They’re recognised in law as separate groups, not as the same group.

That's what I was saying though.

Not very clearly.

Why are you saying British traveller? British traveller isn’t a thing.

British travellers are a thing. As are Romani gypsy. Two completely different groups

It seems wrong that gypsies are seen as fair game for this type of TV - there would rightly be an outcry if other ethnic minority communities were held up to ridicule in this way, or represented by people culturally appropriating their identities.

I won't be watching it.

British travellers are not a thing. What language do they speak, what is their history and culture?

Are you meaning New Age travellers?

They are a thing. And they are the ones who are being put on a tv show. I don't need to go on a sunbed or fake tan, because im naturally that colour, I dont need filled lips because my lips are big enough naturally and I dont pretend to be something im not. I don't know or care what language they speak as I speak romani. But being as quite lot of romani words are used in everyday English anyway it doesn't matter

I’m enjoying the fact that there are Romany women on this thread not agreeing on definitions of words… other people have no hope then!

I am from a Balkan/Eastern European Romani family. I’ve lived in England from a young age. It took me many years to full understand the differences between the different GRT groups in the UK! I would have thought though that English Gypsy was just another word for English Romany Gypsies… no? Who else would be described by the term English Gypsy?

RE whether the woman in this programme has a right to call herself a gypsy wife or not - I am not an English Romany gypsy and I don’t know who this woman is, so I don’t comment on her specifically. What I will say I think it’s hard for people from different cultures to understand, but in Romani groups it’s really important that you grew up in the culture. This isn’t as simple as “did you settle into a house or travel”, there’s a million other cultural aspects to it. Plenty of Romani people live in houses but are still in the culture.

I am 100% Romani blooded but would feel like a fraud to describe myself as a “gypsy” or equivalent words from my language because I didn’t grow up as one. We speak the language, eat the food, listen to music, tell the stories, have the superstitions. But I didn’t grow up in the same way my parents did, in the way cousins my age who stayed on the continent and within the cultural group. My life doesn’t look like a “gypsy” life. My parents don’t consider me to be a “gypsy” - I am 100% Romani, but I’m just simply not living the culture in the way they were as they grew up. Not in a disapproving way, they quite deliberately chose to raise me in an “English” way once we were here. It’s just factual to them that I’m not like them.

I almost think it’s a little bit like an ethnoreligion (not literally). You can be ethnically Romani but unless you’re considered to be actually living the culture, and there is something like a spiritual element to it, then you’re not really Romani.

I certainly would not think anyone wanting to learn about Balkan Romani life would gain much from watching a TV programme about me. I can understand why OP is angry, she feels her culture is being misrepresented by someone who isn’t really in the culture.

You are very foolish if you think anyone from any community who chooses to go on reality TV represents their community. Love Island??? Big Brother?? There is a certain type who goes on TV and they are not the uninteresting upstanding community member.

Am I gathering @Whettlettuce that you don’t regard English Romanichal gypsies as truly Romani? I’m not sure that’s at all reasonable or accurate. Perhaps I’ve misunderstood you but I’m just picking up on some of your terminology.

When I was small there was a clear distinction between Irish travellers (my Grannie called them the Tinkers as they would mend pots and pans, and that is the old title for a metal worker) and Gypsies. They behaved differently, and looked very obviously different ethnically. There seem to be quite big cultural differences between them too. There also used to be travelling Barge people when my parents were young.
Do complain to Ofcom OP, I hope they take notice of you, Romani Gypsies face such difficulty already.

But that's not the same is it. Love island and big brother don't claim to be giving you an insight into anyone's way of life.

You’re avoiding the question. “British Traveller” isn’t a specific ethnic group. Are you referring to Romany Gypsies, Irish Travellers, Scottish Gypsy/Travellers, or New Age Travellers? They’re all different.

Yes i regard them ,of course, but there's confusion between other " groups here in the UK and everyone just gets assumed as the same thing. Im Romani, grew up in the culture and grewup speaking the language and eating the food too,but I didn't stick to the cultural norms and followed my own path as grew up. For me I suppose growing up in the culture i can see the difference between the groups and i know when I was younger my family hated to be thought of as the other groups because they are different. That's not being judgmental, there is a clear difference between Romani and travellers thats all

Haven’t read the whole thread but Stacey Dooley did a great programme interviewing young gypsy girls which was very positive and I really enjoyed the insight into their lives

Im not avoiding the question. Theyre all different groups who keep being lumped together as one group of people. Romani Gypsy, Irish travellers, Scottish gypsy, British travellers/showman. All different

That’s exactly why I’m asking what you mean by “British Travellers.” Romany Gypsies, Irish Travellers and Scottish Gypsy/Travellers are recognised groups. “British Traveller” isn’t a specific ethnic group in the same way, so who are you referring to?

I agree with you @IronEverything. It’s a rubbish representation for entertainment purposes rather than an educational insight.
Write to the channel with your complaint and suggest a program with real life examples of people who are living this way of life, challenges and all rather than dresses and over the top examples of people who have not grown up in the community.

@Whettlettuce you’ve lost me a little, sorry. So are you English Romany gypsy? Or a different group?

I understand what you’re saying - there are plenty of Romani of the same group/origin as my family living in ways we don’t want to be associated with (probably why my parents made a point to live differently as it sounds like you did too). But I can’t deny that they’re the same ethnicity as me. I’m not clear if you’re talking about English Romanichals or Irish travellers when you say about the groups you don’t want to be lumped in with. Sorry!