How can I divide my estate fairly between daughters and grandchildren?

[Ilikesundays]

Would really appreciate your views! I’m in my 80s and have three dds and 7 gcs. All are over 20. Two dds are married: one has 3 DCs and one has 4. Youngest dd is unmarried and has no children. I want to make my will and be fair to all of them. I was thinking of leaving all my property (f/h house, no mortgage in London + fairly substantial savings) to the gcs + the unmarried dd and nothing to the two married DDs. But on reflection this seems very harsh and unfair to them . How would you manage it? They are all working, bar two gcs who are still studying p/g.

This. Too complicated otherwise.

The only ‘fair’ way/ to avoid conflict would be to split it 1/3 between your 3 DDs.

I also think splitting 1/4 between your 3 DDs and then all the GC would work and hopefully not cause any conflict, if you are wanting to leave something to your GC.

A third to each child.

My Grandmother gave all grandchildren a token amount (£1k) while she was still alive, and then her estate was left equally between her 5 children.

My other grandmother left it all equally tk her 6 children. Some of whom gave something to their kids (me / my siblings / cousins) and some of whom didn't give their kids (my cousins) anything.

My parents will us equal between me & siblings. My siblings do not have children, I have 3. So it will be up to me to decide if I forward to my kids.

My PIL will is skip all children and give equally amongst 9 grandchildren. One of my IL has no children, two have just one, two have 2 and we have 3. I personally feel this is not fair because our family unit will ultimately get one third of the benefit, whilst one sibling will get nothing at all. Almost punishing him for not having kids.

I personally preferred the 1st scenario where a token value amount is given to each grandchildren and then all assets or whatever money is left is split equally amongst the children. I'd hate to think a child is bypassed in favour for grandchildren.

I would split it a third for each daughter. Especially as the grandchildren have already received an inheritance when your daughters didn’t.

I would also stipulate that in the event of a daughter predeceasing you, that their share would be inherited by her children. If the daughter with no child predeceases you, then her share is split between her sisters.

My PILs have done similar - three quarters equally between DH and DB and the remaining quarter between the DGC.

That is quite common

I've only read the first OP, probably I am reapeating others.
I would leave everything to my dc and they can mutually decide what to do about the house.

Split a % between all your DCs equally and a % between all your GCs equally. If you think there will be no more GCs, that could be a larger amount. A relative left 50% to children equally and 50% to grandchildren equally, where the GC were split unevenly between families. But I liked this, because it meant all the GCs were treated the same, rather than one potentially being set for life when his parent passed and the others splitting it 4 ways. But each generation being treated equally is important.

Split it between your children.
Then up to them if they want to give some to their own children

I completely agree with this.

OP, you know that you won't have more children but you can't predict how many grandchildren you may eventually have, or how everyone's lives will go.

Marriages end, babies are born, etc etc.

It's not only about the money (which is lovely of you to want to gift to your descendants), it's also about the equal treatment. To say with your actions "No matter what decisions you've made about marriage/parenthood, I value each of you equally" is quite a meaningful statement to leave as a legacy.

I always think this is so weird. In Ireland we tend to leave everything to the next generation, so sons and daughters not grandchildren. So in this case everything would be given to the three daughters equally.

Divide into 4. 1/4 to each daughter. Final 1/4 to any grandchildren alive when before you pass away.

Give it to your children equally then if they want any to go to the grandchildren they can do a deed of variation.

You have 3 children so you split it equally 3 ways its up to the parents if and what they pass down to their children

Leave it to your 3 DD equally then they can pass it on to there kids
because if your childless daughter eventually has kids they will have nothing from you where her siblings kid will of benefited greatly

100% this. Anything else will be or feel unfair to someone.

I know a bit early and sorry if I have missed this.

but op needs legal advice

I thought some thoughts also go into thinking what happens when your married kids divorce? Are you happy for your money to be split with their husbands? That should give you your answer! @Ilikesundays

I’d say divide equally between the three daughters. If they then want to pass to their children they can do.

The only fair way really is to leave it to all of your DDs not just one. Then in turn the grandchildren will hopefully inherit from them. Another way would be to leave the bulk to DDs then a token amount to each GC

edited due to predictive turning DDs into Dads

Eh?
If you divide into 4, each group gets 1/4. So for an estate worth £200k, each child gets £50k and each grandchild gets £7.14k.

I would split it equally between your daughters only, they can pass what they want to onto their children.
My husband’s Grandmother had 4 children, when she died she had split her estate 5 ways. One for each of her children and the final share divided equally between the Grandchildren.
It caused some muttering because there were more grandchildren from one daughter then the other so that family had more money overall out of the estate.

This is what I would do.

I would either split it 3 ways between the DDs. Each gets an equal share.
Or split it equally between all DDs and all grandchildren.

It's unfair and would cause resentment if you cut some of them out because they are married and have their own homes. Just because people are married doesn't mean that is permanent... anything could happen and one or both of the married DDs could end up in difficulties and really need the money.

Leave a small amount to each of gc - £5k, £20k depending what your estate is worth then rest split between your children. They can pass onto their children as and when (by varying the will if needed at the time).

My grandparents left all to both sons, and my dad varied it to pass a chunk to me and my sibling (from his half). His siblings with no children just had has half.