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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the younger MN generation would be shocked at things we did decades ago...

420 replies

Allonthesametrain · 03/07/2026 21:59

It was such a different time, before the days of hand gel, smartphones, ordering online, house cctv, awareness etc.

This is from a background of a good home with values, DF worked hard, DM did everything for us 3 DC and also worked early before we got up and during school hours when we of that age.

Things we would do...

All 3 have a bath together every night when young, also go into after bath DF or DM.

Most clothes were hand me downs/passed on from friends and neighbours and anything new was for a special occasion.

If we wanted anything special we had to wait until Christmas or birthdays and were delighted and grateful

Lucky to have a house phone, it was in the hall way so no privacy and a shout how long are you going to be on there if you rang out

Bedrooms were sparse, we put colour on our walls with posters we got from magazines

Fun time meeting your friends, on foot or bikes, roller boots, usually at the school you've been at all day because it was known and had no big fences around it.

We collected tapes, later CDs, which we listened to over again and had to rewind, also recorded from friends on a double deck

Recorded our favourite songs from the radio, had to pause before next one to not include the DJ's blitherings

Young teens, oldest looking member of group bought a couple of 2L cheapest cider, we all drank from

Pubs, rarely enough loo roll, we never thought to bring our own, wipe by hand or drip dry

Need a wee, you went anywhere

You walked to meet your friends then walked/staggered back, split up on way to walk on your own as girls

You didn't dare argue with a teacher, even when it was unfair as a good student

If you went to university it was a shared bathroom and kitchen between 12, one tine fridge, old pans. Then when you moved out to house share the furniture was from the 1940s, mattresses had springs sticking out, slugs were a normal practice to put outside.

You qualify, get your own first flat, most basic furnished, the slug relatives are there, you still have to go to the laundrette as no washing machine. Single glazing, you put your own film up to help.

This was if lucky, friends from less privileged areas and backgrounds were left to roam, hungry, sniffed glue, caused chaos, were always dirty, same clothes every day. When 'naughty' they were beaten by their parents and disrespected, often hit by teachers.

Things have progressed so much but there are still many living this life within their homes.

So, with the observation of MN posts about things like should I be upset about DC not being offered his favourite food at lunch time just seems so trivial compared to the reality of us as older parents.

Are younger parents picking arguments about what could be deemed as insignificant just because they can now on SM?

Yeah, I know, I will seem as a dinosaur, but Im not. Basic values need to come from home, which we as gen X experienced growing up. When you're a young child and all you know is instant gratification from screens then this is their norm, then going forward their DC. Not saying all parents do this, of course not, but sadly many do.

My point? Oh yes, growing up in harsher times, which wasn't ideal at all but it was what it was and now we appreciate the positives of now, but without knowing what it was like before is it difficult to appreciate and not succumb to a lazier way of parenting?

OP posts:
Charlize43 · 03/07/2026 23:54

Having hand me down tiaras that needed to be altered to fit my head.

Sore, swivel wrists from all the waving.

Accidentally stepping on Ladies in Waiting.

Taking the horse & carriage (the one with all the gilt) to the corner shop to buy a packet of crisps.

Dancing around my crown & coronet in the pub to Abba's Dancing Queen.

GoneWithTHeWindJammers · 03/07/2026 23:56

My grandfather lied about his age, joined the army at 16 and went to the trenches at 17. He survived and joined up again in 1939. Nan was in the ARP. Our other grandpa was in WW1 too. One uncle was at Dunkirk and another was on one of the ships that sank the Bismarck.

Our family have always loved adventure. My parents were both evacuated during WW2.

Our uncle gave us some WW2 field telephones that we rigged up so we could phone Dad up in his green house to tell him his tea was ready. I miss them all so much. Mum, Dad, Gran, Grandad. and my Uncles.

JudgeJ · 03/07/2026 23:56

ShakaWhenTheWallsFell · 03/07/2026 22:08

You had a road? Luxury!

At least you appreciate the humour of that time! I'm a much despised boomer so 20 years older but even I don't recall not having toilet paper though in older houses with an outside loo that might be newspaper cut up and strung from a nail!

Shareadog · 03/07/2026 23:57

Op, you’ve muddled your timeline up. CD’s weren’t widely in use until about 1986 in the UK. That was NOT the same time as the some of the other shit you’re on about which was more 1950s/60s

Netcurtainnelly · 03/07/2026 23:57

No.internet or texts we used to write lots of letters that friends, boyfriends etc. postcards.
My friends mum.put a lock on their phone remember those. It was a waste of time though my friend knew how to pick.it.

Shareadog · 03/07/2026 23:58

My grandfather lied about his age, joined the army at 16 and went to the trenches at 17. He survived and joined up again in 1939.

not the brightest then!

AGlessandahalf · 03/07/2026 23:59

Shareadog · 03/07/2026 23:58

My grandfather lied about his age, joined the army at 16 and went to the trenches at 17. He survived and joined up again in 1939.

not the brightest then!

Wtaf???
There are so many things that you lack understanding in about this era if you genuinely stand by this post.

AGlessandahalf · 04/07/2026 00:00

Shareadog · 03/07/2026 23:57

Op, you’ve muddled your timeline up. CD’s weren’t widely in use until about 1986 in the UK. That was NOT the same time as the some of the other shit you’re on about which was more 1950s/60s

Born 1972 and the majority rings true for me.
Different strokes and all that

AGlessandahalf · 04/07/2026 00:02

At 17 I was actually coordinating babysitting services for most of our village between me and my sister and our friends!

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 00:04

shockmethen · 03/07/2026 22:05

Op how old are you? We certainly didn’t share baths. We showered or bathed daily by ourselves. My clothes were not hand me downs. Everyone had a house phone. I was born in ‘67

Which country?

OP posts:
BlackeyedSusan · 04/07/2026 00:06

My clothes were hand me downs from male cousins, homemade for party dresses, or bought in the sale ( some from the shop that caught fire and were smoke damaged) (70s)

My cousin's only had an outside loo and no bathroom for a while. (Out the back (only) door, across the back and up the side of the cottage next door, across the road, past the nettles and to the loo. (Early/mid 70s)

My friend had a bathroom and loo but you had to go through a bedroom to get to it. They still used the outside loo a lot. (Late 80s)

We roamed miles on our bikes/on foot until after sunset. Played out in the dark. Played on the road itself until dad's came home from work. (From very young)

Were collected by the playschool leader and squished in the back of her mini with no seatbelts. Allowed to run ahead and get lost.

Walked to school with a friend from 5.

Latch key kid from 7

Bathed once a week in bathroom. One shared tank of water. (Shallow baths) Or a plastic baby bath or the kitchen sink sat on the draining board.

You did what you were told or got smacked. (Even by teachers)

JillyComeLately · 04/07/2026 00:06

Shareadog · 03/07/2026 23:58

My grandfather lied about his age, joined the army at 16 and went to the trenches at 17. He survived and joined up again in 1939.

not the brightest then!

Nasty and uncalled for.

JudgeJ · 04/07/2026 00:07

The very oldies will decipher a radio station from this!

K E Y N S H A M

can't recall his name though, Horace rings a bell

JudgeJ · 04/07/2026 00:07

JillyComeLately · 04/07/2026 00:06

Nasty and uncalled for.

Exactly.

LettingItAllHangOut · 04/07/2026 00:08

Ninetysixdegreesintheshade · 03/07/2026 22:05

Walked 25 miles to school in 6 foot of snow with holes in our shoes.

Uphill both ways.

Isittimeformynapyet · 04/07/2026 00:08

@FullLondonEye and @IrisPallida

You both make good points, there's no need to be sarcastic to each other!

Men have always caused women grief and trauma, it's just changed over time.

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 00:09

Echobelly · 03/07/2026 22:09

I think people still do bathing together and handmedowns, TBH, as Gen X myself.

My siblings and I would bugger off to walk along a local brook when the three of us were aged 6-12 and I walked to my mates 10 minutes away regularly from age 7. TBH, the way we look at this stuff is odd - some people seem to look back on it and are like 'Oh, kids were so much more capable' and others are 'OMG, boomer parents were so negligent'. I personally think it was (and is) appropriate levels of independence as long as parents have just given some thought to whether their kid can handle it and their kid is comfortable to do it, knows their route etc. The main block now isn't worse parenting but societal disapproval and insistence that kids are in more danger than they were in the past. I would love to have sent my kids out alone sooner, but I knew there are people who would consider it 'neglect'.

Indeed, it was much more prevalent but my parents wouldn't let us go further than the end of the estate, always had to be within call distance. The one time I ventured with friends from another estate on my bike and was back late I felt so guilty because DM had been looking for me.

OP posts:
JudgeJ · 04/07/2026 00:10

Sahara123 · 03/07/2026 23:09

Not a Monty Python fan then !

Send in the Spanish Inquisition.

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 00:11

Ninetysixdegreesintheshade · 03/07/2026 22:05

Walked 25 miles to school in 6 foot of snow with holes in our shoes.

Oh so sorry, we only had to walk 5 miles and that was at university

OP posts:
LettingItAllHangOut · 04/07/2026 00:11

JudgeJ · 04/07/2026 00:07

The very oldies will decipher a radio station from this!

K E Y N S H A M

can't recall his name though, Horace rings a bell

Horace Batchelor

Isittimeformynapyet · 04/07/2026 00:13

SevenYellowHammers · 03/07/2026 23:36

You were lucky

This has been done to death on this thread alone.

I love Monty Python, but it's getting less funny every time someone else says "you were lucky". Which is a shame.

JudgeJ · 04/07/2026 00:14

Charlize43 · 03/07/2026 23:54

Having hand me down tiaras that needed to be altered to fit my head.

Sore, swivel wrists from all the waving.

Accidentally stepping on Ladies in Waiting.

Taking the horse & carriage (the one with all the gilt) to the corner shop to buy a packet of crisps.

Dancing around my crown & coronet in the pub to Abba's Dancing Queen.

But did you get the tiara you wanted or did you send your fiance to stamp his feet and demand you get what you wanted?

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 00:14

Allowingthebreeze · 03/07/2026 22:10

Much easier times in so many ways.

No endless social media where any transgression could be uploaded that would haunt you forever for likes by a stranger … Exercise and activity meaning we weren’t stuck inside getting anxious… Tuck shops where there didn’t need to be restrictions cos we would run the calories off….. meeting genuine people and getting to know them by talking all night… the romantic stupidity of the mixed tape… the joy of recording a song from the radio… and I mourn what the kids have to take into consideration now.

Absolutely xx

OP posts:
Isittimeformynapyet · 04/07/2026 00:15

Luvnhugs · 03/07/2026 23:44

You were lucky 😂

And another one

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 00:17

relaxitsok · 03/07/2026 22:11

I was with you until wiping with your hand when short on loo roll!!

Really? No loo roll after a wee so hand to get rid of the drops then wash after? We did also use to turn the cardboard toilet roll holder inside out to wipe?

OP posts:
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