AIBU to worry I will never be able to use inheritance money?

[WanderingStar26]

An inheritance one, kind of.

I am a single parent, I have a disability which limits how much I can work, I live in a HA house, my youngest child is 16 and going to college in September.

I’ve been aware of the fact that I have had the buffer of UC for years, as well as working PT, but that will be coming to an end (or at least massively reducing) when my youngest finishes education. I have been really trying to up my earnings (I’m self employed), and I’m doing better than I was but it’s difficult health-wise, and I’m definitely not going to be able to get a mortgage anytime soon.

Today my DF announced that he was selling one of his properties and splitting the money between his 4 DC. My three siblings all own their own properties, so that’s really handy for them as they can pay off a chunk of their mortgages. The stipulation to this money is that it can ONLY be used for property, so if I can’t buy then I won’t get it, basically.

It’s very generous of him but realistically I’m not sure how I will ever be able to make use of the money? I repeat, he will not let me have it unless it’s going towards a property purchase. Which is fair enough I guess as he doesn’t want to see it wasted. But I don’t see a realistic chance of me buying a property, ever, sadly, much as I’d love to.

He said he will put my share in an account and when I need it I can have it. But I’m mid forties now, my health seems to be going downhill and despite me really doing my best, my income isn’t ever going to be at a point where I can get a mortgage.

I’m not sure what to suggest? Maybe ask him to put it in a trust so it might benefit my DCs in future? I’m just worried that if it sits in a random account then eventually I might have problems retrieving it from the wicked stepmother (a whole other thread), and best case scenario will end up losing a chunk of it to inheritance tax. My DF is 73.

Could you use it to buy a flat (possibly in a cheaper area) and then rent the flat out for income?

This may be helpful.We have 2 grandsons who are ND and unlikely to even be Independant We have trust funds set up as disabled trust funds meaning they can still access UC Our solicitor advised us.Could you look into this ?Good luck how difficult for you.

Why don’t you think you can get a mortgage?

How about asking your Dad to keep the money carefully invested for your second child.

In ten years, when she gets a secure job, he could gift the money towards her buying a home. She will then be more independent and also be more likely to be in a position to be able to watch out for her sister when you die.

The other option of buying a house with your brother is a good one but put your portion in the name of your youngest daughter with the intention that she is the beneficiary when she is able to handlea mortgage.

Most importantly - seek advice from your father's accountant.

Her DF has said bricks and mortar. A motorhome is a depreciating asset.

I think you should ask him to put into a pension for you. Hargreaves Lansdown for example, have SIPPs you can manage yourself (but also has the option for managed funds). That way you’re protecting your future and the money will continue to grow. Pension savings do not impact your UC / benefits. £60,000 could grow into £150,000+ over 20 years giving you a reasonable annual income when you retire.

Would it be enoughfor a 25% share of a shared ownership property?

I mean, he is punishing you, isn't he? Why? Why do you think he would do that? And do your siblings have to use it to pay off their mortgage? Will he want proof that they have?

I don't understand his mentality here at all.

Do you think he understands that it is no gift to you at all with these strings?

Not if it's put into a house he could legally gift it to her

So you’ll get about £200k from your mum? Will
you be able to use this as you wish or will there be stipulations for it too?

OP, from your DF’s POV, if he gives the money to you, you’ll have to live on it because you’ll lose your benefits, so it wouldn’t actually be any advantage to you. If he wants it to be put into bricks and mortar, I’d ask him to set up a trust for your youngest DC so that they can use it for a house deposit when they are older and earning.

£70k plus how much do you actually earn? You could definitely do something with this. A little holiday flat maybe? There are places where you could buy a little studio outright for that money. You don’t have to live in it, but you could invest it or rent it out. I also like the land suggestion someone else made. Don’t miss out on the money OP.

Shared ownership? You need to do a lot of research and take legal advice but make sure he puts the money in a high interest savings account so at least it's making something.

A gift is not a gift when there are strings attached. Your dad sounds like a bit of a prick to be honest.

How will talking to the DWP change the fact that the OP won't get this money unless she uses it to buy property, as per her father's wishes

If he gave it to you, you’d have to declare it even if you invested it. So you’d lose your UC. When I claimed UC they wanted to know what savings I had. I think it’s best if he can put it into your pension pot. That way you’d have it for the future. Or he hangs onto it until your mum passes then the two inheritances combined would allow you to buy? But it isn’t fair of him to withhold it as it’s only fair to gift you the money at the same time as the other siblings.

I haven’t read all of the posts so may have already been suggested but is shared ownership property an option? I don’t know where you are based but it could be 20/30/40% ownership and you can still rent the other part. Probably make rent cheaper for you and a lot more secure than private rent.

Discuss with a mortgage advisor like L&C I bought a house on low income as they found a mortgage that accepted benefits as part of your income. You might lose housing benefit but would still be entitled to other parts

You don't have to live in the property. Theres flipping, buy to let and holiday rental to consider. Theres also buying at auction. I would explore lots of options around this. Potentially there is a solution thay will enable you to build some wealth and security. I would also speAk to hik about how you could do this while not losing your UC like him buying and putting in your daughters name for example. Or even speak about skipping a generation so it goes to your daughter when she wants to buy.
You don't want to lose UC entitlemrnt if you are unable to wok due to illness. But here could be many options.

If he won't budge then I would just move on and forget about it. Gifts shouldn't come with directives like this, it's manipulation

My inlaws offered us a house but only if we would let them dictate a key part of our DC upbringing - needless to say we declined their offer!

I know its not the same, but it's left me feeling repulsed by situations like this and I will never accept a 'gift' like this

It's not an inheritance that is in question at the moment , it's a gift from your dad. I think your best option is to keep talking to him. Tell him you understand that he wants the gift to be of lasting value to you, but you can't see a way to buy a property, at least at the moment, perhaps ever. So would something else fit that bill? Maybe a pension fund? Maybe an annuity which would give you a little income each year and enable you to keep working part time after your benefits reduce ? Maybe an investment which would mature in 10 years time, at which point you could consider buying something small in a cheaper area? Try to get him onside with helping to find a way he can give you your share of the gift.

Are you very close to a sibling who you trust? Maybr you could offer it for them to add to their property, on the condition you benefit from the increase in property value when they sell. Or ask your dad to put it in an account for your children to eventually use for their property.

friends daughter was left an inheritance of £60k

The council brought and purchased on 2/3 new estates along side HA but the council shared ownership scheme means she owns that part for now and can in the future buy the property bit by bit if she wants

So she put down the £60k on the council property and rents the other part

No mortgage, just part ownership and renting

Some HA part ownership might start at £60/70k and you could do exactly this

Your father would give you the deposit and you must make that transaction clear to UC

There are places in the UK where you could buy a property outright for that, and let it out. You won't make a lot of money but it will be property and yours, and when your dad is gone you can sell it and live off it or whatever you want.

I don't think UC can touch pensions, I think it's the only savings that they can't take into account.
Otherwise he should probably gift it to your DC.