Should I dump my boyfriend because he won't stop eating crisps?

[Spicyseniorita7]

I'm in a relatively new relationship (7 months) after over 2 years of being single with some dating disasters along the way. Everything seems great on paper, he is kind, has a good job that pays well, not bad looking, treats me well and never allows me to pay for anything. For context, I am 28F and he is 32M- we both live separately at present. I would like to settle down soon.

I'm unsure if I am self-sabotaging, but some of his eating/snacking habits disgust me, to the point that I think I've developed the ick. This came to light properly on our recent 2 week holiday-prior to this, the longest we had spent together was about 3 days. He eats at least 3 packets of crisps per day and not the sophisticated type i.e kettle chips, think more Skips/monster munch/Nik naks/cheesy wotsits/space raiders. He doesn't wash his hands after eating the crisps and requires prompting to do so. This often results in him having disgusting synthetic crisp dust all over his fingers and fingernails.

Even more disgustingly, after he's finished with a packet, he arches back his head and empties the remnants of the crisp crumbs into his mouth. It's almost as though he cannot bear for a single scrap to be wasted. But the most disgusting is sometimes, after finishing a packet, he will blow up the packet like a balloon and pop it. This has resulted in me being sprayed with crumbs. I've also found scrunched up crisp packets wedged behind his bed, almost as though he can't be bothered to walk to the bin.

We recently went on holiday to Spain and it was mortifying-he didn't try any local food and just wanted to eat British food, McDonald's and crisps. We went to the supermarket and he loaded up the trolley with crisps. I haven't said anything yet, he is keen to start looking for a flat to rent together, but I just can't help but thinking I would prefer a man who doesn't eat over 3 packets of crisps a day and doesn't smell like pickled onion Monster Munch or cheesy wotsits. Is eating all of those crisps a dumpable offence?

To be fair to the OP I don't think she's prepared to hold up the woman's end of the "traditional values" bargain. She wants a man who does the laundry and pays for everything. And obeys her on when, what, and how to eat. God help the poor fella.

You are clearly not compatible OP, so why force it? Some of your comments actually sounded quite condescending, like he's a nice guy but he's not quite good enough for you. Yes, if you coach him, he could probably change or at least act differently, but that wouldn't be who he really is which in time would cause resentment. Eating is a big part of who someone is and if his eating habits disgust you (not annoy or irritate, but disgust), then you really should just walk away. To answer your question, you shouldn't dump him because he eats crisps, you should dump him because you are incompatible, and your values are not aligned.

Sorry but I couldn't help but laugh at your post 😂 what is he a 10 year old 🤣 in all seriousness though I think it's more the not willing to try other foods while in another country that would put me off plus the hygiene of not washing his hands before after eating the crisps is vile.

I’m intrigued by all the people who think not washing your hands after eating crisps is ‘poor personal hygiene’. That sounds bizarre to me and I have never seen anyone jump up and wash their hands after eating crisps. They are greasy, so sure I’ll wipe my fingers on a tissue, but that’s as far as it goes and I certainly wouldn’t appreciate being accused of being a minger for it!

I can think of worse ‘red flags’. But if you’ve been given the ick and there is no going back for you then I would say call it a day.

Eating that amount of crisps a day would be pretty bad in my view but eating things like monster munch, cheesy wotsits, skips etc! In my view he has no taste in food whatsoever and I could not be with someone like that.

Monster munch and whatsits are vile and they stink. I would almost rather starve than eat them.

DH eats marmite crisps which I think are awful but only maybe once a fortnight

Doesn't bother me at all that he eats tons of crisps. I've been known to binge of shit food from time to time as well, but the childish popping bags and the absolute lack of any adventurous eating when you're abroad are the big problems here.

Was it that he "Just" wanted to go to McDonalds and you caved or was it that he outright refused to try any foreign foods at all? If its the latter he can get in the bin, part of going away is eating all the cool and exciting foods you don't get at home ad if he's stopping me doing that, one of the main reasons i'd want to go abroad then I couldn't deal with it.

I have to agree.

Agree completely!

When I read your title I thought YWBU but after I read your whole post I completely agree with you. Those kind of stinky crisps really gross me out and they absolutely stink. I wouldn’t want to hold hands with someone with wotsitty fingers and I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who isn’t interested in food. It’s one of the great joys of being in a relationship, going out to eat to try different foods!

My DH enjoys the odd packet of chilli heatwave Doritos 🤮 but has the good grace to eat them away from me, wash his hands and knows there will be no kissing unless he has washed his mouth out or sufficient time has passed.

He sounds immature.

Not after a packet of ready salted kettle chips you wouldn’t but if you’ve been eating monster munch or wotsits they leave loads of smelly powder on your hands. It’s good manners to wash them after or at least wipe with a napkin.

I dunno, Salt and Vinegar chipsticks are a close contender.

I'd dump someone who didn't want to eat local food on holiday, and also someone who didn't know how to use a washing machine or had their mum doing their washing.

You can leave the relationship for any reason you want. It’s not unreasonable. You can dump him because it’s Wednesday!

That said, I’m glad my husband’s standards are lower than yours. I bloody love cheap crisps, Space Raiders especially. I would never leave scrunched packets everywhere or burst them though!

Your crisp snobbery is weird.

Not washing his hands is a bit grim though and the bag popping understandably annoying, so it would be reasonable to ask him to stop and get frustrated if he didn’t.

I would consider ending a relationship over the McDonalds and only British food in Spain issue. I don’t judge picky eaters or consider it a character defect in any way. But I love eating out, exploring new places and trying new foods so a picky eater would be incompatible for something that’s quite important to me long term.

Do you guys not eat out when at home for this to have been highlighted as an issue before?

Is there any chance that he could be pregnant? 😅
I had a massive craving for cheesy wotsits every time I was pregnant 😂

I'm not sure.
Whats his stance on Scampi Fries?

Why do let him pay for everything?
Have some pride

If he wolfed down the kettle chips without coming up for air, would that be socially acceptable? I’m struggling to see why the type of crisp makes any difference!

I guess if it was me, I wouldn’t just jump straight to dumping him, I’d talk to him first and tell him it’s an ick and ask if he could at least wash his hands and not spray crumbs everywhere and stop leaving crisp packets lying around.

Why do you let him pay for everything? How is that a good thing in a relationship? Crisps aside, why aren't you equal?

I have to move seats if I'm on a train or a bus near someone eating crisps. Gross. So no, YANBU at all.

I like posh crisps (also unhealthy) and Nik Naks etc but I always put them in a bowl (get me!) and I always wash my hands afterwards. He might have been brought up to not waste anything, however, he sounds like a teenager with all the other things he does, hasn’t been taught any manners or how to look after himself and no doubt, is keen to start flat hunting with you so that you can take on the domestic load for him. You don’t sound suited to each other and should look for someone with better manners, eating habits and a large bank balance.

OP, he's not the one for you. Your description of him tells us that before crisps are mentioned. You say you want to settle down but I don't think you should with him. He deserves to be with someone who massively fancies him not who thinks he's solvent, passable and just needs retraining. I think there is definitely someone else out there who is perfect for you. Don't waste any more of anyone's time.

Popping the bag in her face? Of course he should change that. He’s not 10 years old.

Tellhim you hatethe smell.