AIBU to object when a bus driver repeatedly called me darling?

[DontDareCallMeDarling]

I caught a bus today to a National Trust property I'm very unfamiliar with. The bus driver told me the bus back to town was across the road from where he dropped me off so of course I waited there.

When a bus turned up the driver said I was at the wrong bus stop and need to be across the road. I was puzzled because that would take me away from where I needed to go. I told him that I'd come from the other direction "No you didn't darling" ... I was adamant that I did, because I know I did. "Sorry darling you didn't"

I replied that I was not his darling. Clearly the original bus driver gave me the wrong information, though I was worried about not getting back, missing the right bus, and having what people often think of as a term of endearment (a matter of opinion) used to try to correct me.

I crossed the road and caught the bus but only just made it. All very confusing.

I love that!

A complete over reaction to someone trying and succeeding in helping you despite your rubbish attitude to him. Good job the bus driver was polite to you despite your rudeness.

I'm also impressed you live somewhere where one public bus takes you 250 miles away to a national property.

I used to love my Scottish boss calling me his Wee Hen (I was v young and he was retirement age) 🥹

That's so sweet!

In these kinds of situations I would stop and have a think about the person’s motives. In this case, use of the word ‘darling’ comes from a kind and caring place.

Ah see that sounds so sweet.

I've never been anybody's wee hen...

Even if he was being patronising, so what, is it really worth getting upset about and mulling over after the fact?

It happens. You can't change it unfortunately. I find it best to assume good intent and not look for possible slights to obsess over.

The ‘Darling’ bit wouldn’t bother me, and you told him at the time.

Also, he was trying to be helpful with the bus advice.

You objected at the time. No need to take any further, if that was your intention.

Same here, otherwise - how do you get through life? Mulling over everything petty?

Wait until they call you ‘Dear’ in a kindly voice. It makes you feel a hundred however kindly it is said. Having said that , bus drivers in my experience are so kind and helpful.

It depends on how it’s said.

was he trying to be nice or was he trying to patronise you?

Well its better then cock
I get love a lot which i dont mind

Never live up north OP, you’ll be objecting 24/7 😂

I got told off for calling someone 'love' last week, but I apologised by saying "Oh I am sorry sweetheart" which I am sure made up for it 😂
DO NOT COME NORTH OP!!!

Wouldn’t bother me, people use ‘darling’ ‘love’, ‘my lovely’ (my vet’s receptionist says this to everyone inc- men and women), ‘me duck’ if you’re in Nottingham, ‘my lover’ (Bristol).

Depending on where colleagues are from, I'm duck, mate, hun, love, lovely, sweetie, sweet, darling, my lover and babe. It's not something I can get worked up about. I do hold my hands up and admit I call people lovely. It's a habit I'm trying to break, but it's hard!

Best you give our train station a miss everyone get flower or buttercup from the woman on the platform

Imagine being an experienced bus driver and telling a customer they were in the wrong place as the bus didn’t stop there and then the customer having a go at you and telling you they were wrong. My DH is a bus driver and he now refuses to do service runs as the public can be SO unpleasant. He only does school and MOD runs now as the school kids are kept in line by the teachers and the MOD are kept in line by the Sargent etc. But the public? Often Rude, offensive, entitled and even threatening.

I was once called “my pet” by a lovely lady at Edinburgh airport security!

@DontDareCallMeDarling

can I just clarify….. the services bus driver was CORRECT? You crossed the road, got the bus so his information is right and it was the first driver who did you a dirty……and you are complaining because the second driver called you DARLING while pointing out that you were in the wrong place? He did not actually, in fact, give you incorrect information or take you to the wrong place? You got home just fine by doing as he said?

YABU. He was being polite.

I used to work with a women who was from Jamaica
And calleed anyone and everyone who she considdred was being a bit silly /Daft
A silly Twat no matter how many times we told her it was highly offensive she carried on using it because where she was from it was a very mild insult.

M

Never been called hen when visiting Scotland. It's the only place where I've been called pal

You’ve got too much time on your hands.

Depends where you are in the country. I moved from Kent to Yorkshire. In Kent "darling" is basically a term used for a spouse or your child, in Yorkshire it's use is a lot more general, especially amongst people over about 60!