AIBU to think my neighbour’s cat care problem is not mine?

[Thepartwhereidrun]

My neighbour stopped my son on his way out last night to ask if he would look after her cat when she is away from tomorrow for 2 weeks, going in twice a day. He said sorry but he couldn’t.

I didn’t know she had spoken to him until she knocked our door and told us. Her cat sitter has let her down last minute and now she won’t be able to go on holiday unless she can find someone else. Nightmare for her, but her cat sitter is ill so it can’t be helped. I said I can’t help her but I text our dog sitter, who also does cat sitting to ask if she had availability and said I’d get back to her if she could do it.

She asked if I would also ask my son again, which I did when he got home, but he doesn’t want to do it. He has just finished his A levels and wants to be free to come and go as he pleases which is understandable. I said that if he has said no then that means he can’t.

Our dog sitter text me back to say she didn’t have any availability for the first week but could do the second week. I text my neighbour to let her know and to give her sitters contact details. She has just text back ‘no good, what am I meant to do for the first week?’

I haven’t replied as although I get she is probably feeling desperate, how the fuck is her cat my problem?

I'm also glad that you don't live where I live. Or at least I hope you don't.

As a former cattery owner, we had so many desperate calls last minute from people who had been let down by cat sitters. It's not just feeding/cleaning litter trays etc., What if the cat gets ill? As you've said, your son and you are both away. £30 is an insult! YANBU

Even though I think you should do it, if I were the neighbour I wouldn't trust you to do it. If it's not someone you have absolute faith in, or a paid service, then it's too much of a risk.

I had very sad news recently that a cat our charity homed to someone died. It was during the mini heatwave a few weeks ago. The owners went on holiday and arranged for a local "friend" to come to feed. The friend did it for a couple of days then didn't bother and the cat died of dehydration.

It’s not your problem but if it were me I would do the first week between you and your Son if you are around, and then tell her to book the cat sitter for the second week.
Our neighbour (4 doors up) asked me if my Son could do it (age 13) and knows him as children in the same year at school. I left it up to him to decide, he chose to do the evening feed so it left him free to lie in and do whatever he wanted to do and I did the early morning as I start work 7.30. It literally took minutes, and she left £50 on the side for us and a box of chocolates.

I think it’s the way she has asked and not taken no for answer that has made the request unreasonable, rather than her being unreasonable up ask.

Refusing to roll over for a rude, demanding, ungrateful neighbour isn't being mean.

OP has offered her own pet sitting contact - that wasn't good enough
OP's son offered his friends details - that wasn't good enough.

Now it's the day of the holiday, she suddenly wants the son's friends details and when he doesn't immediately appear when he has his own life to live such as work, she moans that he's unreliable.

Frankly, I would've told her that I don't want to hear another word about her fucking cat days ago.

I disagree

Taking the initiative to arrange emergency pet care for a lower rate than the neighbour would have to pay the professional service she claimed to have been let down by is actually a rather significant favour. A reasonable person would've been grateful for it.

Then you're clearly a mug.

I'd happily feed someone's cat if I was available but not for a rude or entitled person.

It’s part of having animals. I am away a lot for work so I’m used to paying a sitter if my family and friends can’t help. My son looks after our dogs if I’m away now he’s older, but even as his mum and for our own dogs, I don’t expect him to stay home when he has things planned.

Then youre clearly stonehearted

In fairness, she may also be doing that thing where people volunteer the time of others much more lavishly than they'd do with their own. That's the other possibility. The easiest sacrifices are always the ones you expect of other people.

Has CF NDN left for her holibobs yet @Thepartwhereidrun?

No. I'm just not a mug.

Why would I help someone if they are rude to me?

She wasnt rude?

Wow! Do you need to go and have a lie down?

This week I will be away from Monday morning until Thursday evening and I wouldn’t leave a cat alone for that time. Shame on you if you would.

My son doesn’t have the whole summer to go camping with his friends and girlfriend because they will all be working, saving for uni. A group of them have booked some time off together straight after exams to do some things together. After that they won’t all be free at the same time. It’ll be those friendships he builds now that will hopefully give him people to rely on when he needs his future pets fed when he’s on holiday so worth investing in these relationships.😉 He doesn’t need to stay home because of a neighbours holiday plans and it’s batshit to think he doesn’t. I’m not sure your post can be real.

He has been really helpful to the neighbour, he went and spoke to her, offered to get numbers to catteries and sitters, spoke to his friend to see if he could do it and then offered that as an option to her. He’s just done his exams, he has 2 jobs, he’s a good lad, so shame on you for coming on a thread talking that way about my son.

I was going to say I’m glad I don’t live by you either, but maybe you are my cheeky fucker neighbour.

Why should the son put his plans on hold just to be neighbourly? He will know what days he has off work and when he can get away, why should he take on the responsibility of someone else's pet.

I also agree with another poster regarding the vet. What if something happened to the cat? Vets fees are not cheap and considering the CF neighbour doesn't want to pay a sitter or cattery if the OP had to take the cat to the vet would she see any money returned for any treatment the cat needed?

Alright alright! I thought you were looking for different views, jeez!!

You’re clearly trolling. Move along.

This thread is the gift that keeps on giving!!

OP you’re absolutely not in the wrong and neither is your son. If anything, you’ve both been more than generous with your time in trying to help find alternatives.

Shame on your neighbour for expecting other people to sort out her poor planning.

I’d ignore these posters. Your son sounds like a great kid who has done what he can to help her in the circumstances.

No. I genuinely would help a neighbour in need.

I really hope she isn't planning to post the keys through your door and bugger off on holiday! Your son was too kind recommending his friend or giving any explanation at all why he couldn't do it himself, it's her responsibility to sort out her own cat!

I’m not sure. I’m in the garden, laying low. 😂

I would check there isn't an envelope on your doormat with the keys and instructions for DS' friend inside it!

Oh god don’t. I really don’t know what I’d do. Poor cat if she does because I really am not going to be here for the most part of 4 days. I know it’s not my problem but I do love animals and couldn’t see one suffer. He is a lovely cat, very friendly, not much of a mouser so would go hungry. 😞