To have not backed down on this shit of a man on the train?

[Chefpig]

I went to the toilet on a busy commuter train. Came back and the person I was sat next to has his feet on the seat I had vacated. I said excuse me please to him and he begrudgingly moved his feet and sat down. Hes way over my seat with his body anyway with the way he's sat but when I sat down he said 'for fucks sake'. When I asked if there was an issue and not to say for fucks sake to my simple request, he said I was sitting on his knee. I am absolutely not touching him. I told him so and that the way he is sitting means he is taking up some of my seat and that hes very rude, including putting his skanky feet on the seat. He shut up then, but its time after time of men (and a few women, but mostly men) who have their bags on the seats or are just shit fellow commuters with their incessant sniffing and just being unpleasant when asked to move their belongings to free up a seat. AIBU?

I am SO going to tell the next feet on seat wankbadger to move his filthy trotters. A perfect foot insult.

It’s not that hard to picture how he would have been sitting. OP has a right to feel a bit exasperated by this line of detailed questioning with the subtext that she is somehow making it up.

This, it’s not the OP who is coming over as odd. I had no trouble understanding what she described.

You see this hogging of seats with bags a lot commuting to London. I just say “please move your bag” and don’t smile or engage. I’ve never had anyone refuse and they know they’re being unreasonable.

If I say it to a woman, they’re always sheepishly apologetic - I do think women use it as a way to repel weirdos with personal space issues.

@AtlasPine @NeelyOHara please share how you think he was sitting, it’s bugging me. Maybe with one foot over the knee?

i remember the days of commuting with people reading broadsheets, now that was annoying!

Not at all. I do the exact same thing to all manspreaders (or people wearing their backpacks on their backs when it is standing room only, or people playing music full blast) on public transport.

I have done this hundreds of times over the years. 95% of the time, they do what I ask them to do - with a sigh sometimes.

Otherwise, I have been called various names (absolutely fine), had the odd altercation (adrenaline pumping but I hold my own and tell them exactly how rude they are being) and no real progress, and once had a man play elbow wars with me. That was the worst.

I speak up not only to solve the issue itself but because I hope if enough of us do it, offenders will gradually feel too embarrassed to do it in the future or other people will feel they can speak up themselves having seen this generally cheery redheaded woman (me) do it with some success and where nothing too bad happens to her.

It’s more usually on buses, but me too, and I never understand why so many people are apparently reluctant to ask people to move their bags - or to move up, if they’re sitting in an aisle seat with the window one vacant.
I get the odd eye roll, but nobody’s ever refused, or been abusive.

Around here, I’m afraid to say it’s almost always young women who plonk themselves in the first available, I.e. the elderly/disabled seats. And no, before anyone says it, I don’t believe they can possibly all have hidden disabilities.

I had a tall man on the tube gently rest their broadsheet on my head (I’m short, we were both standing). It did not rest there for long!

Yes i agree. I do the same.

I'm trying to picture this too. Imagining a middle aged man looking like a child with both feet on the seat. Could imagine a teenager doing it, more flexible.

Yanbu. However I have to say I find this occurs both with male and females equally. Especially the bag thing. However I see women spreading over double seats often too.

The putting your feet on the seat thing disgusts me. You are walking on dirt with those feet and expect others to sit on that so you can be "comfy"

Start farting and burping.

YANB to challenge and he’s out of order.

But, in my experience women are by far the most serial offenders when it comes to bags on the seats.

😂😂😂 definitely do it!

I was sitting in the middle seat on a plane when the man seated in the aisle touched me up. I elbowed him hard in the chest and began shouting at him, calling him a dirty effing pervert. When he leaped out of his seat I got into it and refused to allow him back. The cabin crew had to find him another seat. Every time I walked past him to the toilet I called him a pervert and reminded the people sitting next to him what he had done. I bet it was not an enjoyable flight for him but i\ got very high on the power trip of humiliating him. I bet he never tried that again.

I once worked as a dominatrix on a telephone chat line so don't try it on with me, sonny.

It doesn’t matter why people are doing it. Unless they’ve bought their bag a seat they’re not entitled to use it.

You're not entitled to force anyone to move it either

bags on seats really annoy me
in crowded trains and people have their bags on their seats with people having to stand

If he’s ‘asleep’ drop your bag on his feet, he won’t know, he’s asleep…..,.
Then cough in his face.

Of course you are. They paid for 1 seat not 2. And if they won't see sense, find staff.

I’d love to be friends with you! I have so many commuter gripes, the absolute worst is the music without the earphones but they definitely need to bring back the “no feet on seats” stickers and “keep your bags off the seats” announcements. People with luggage in the accessible seating also very much bugs me and those in priority seating and not looking up at each stop to assess if anyone might need the seat more than them (although I don’t question this as I know many have hidden disabilities so I’m hoping this is the case and they’re not just selfish). I did have to ask people in priority seating if any were able to stand once though because a heavily pregnant woman looked as though she was going to faint and nobody had had the manners to let her sit down!

I think people have become more selfish public transport users in the past 10 years or so. I think announcements and posters would help at least make them aware that it is (or should be) socially unacceptable.

Anyway…not in least bit unreasonable and he sounds like a selfish manchild who shouldn’t be allowed out until he learns proper manners.

Really??!!!!!😵

Honestly! I can’t get my head round getting ready for work and thinking I will just pack my toe nails in my work bag so I can trim my toe nails on the train 😂 the fact it’s happened twice though is crazy so it isn’t just one person thinking this!

Staff don't have the right either.