Feeling uncomfortable after sharing a seat with a very obese passenger

[Bayleaftree63]

On public transport earlier. A very large woman sits nexts to me. She couldn’t get the seat belt
round her. Her body spilt over into my seat, leaving me squashed with what little space there was left.

On the journey I couldn’t help be annoyed at the lack of space I was left with and questioning how do people let themselves get to that size. Talking morbidly obese, not just larger - whatever the medical
term.

This isn’t about shaming, more I’m in disbelief people being that big are happy? Why wouldn’t you want to loose some weight for a healthier lifestyle.

No idea...I didn't mention BMI..

As I recall it from industry publications passenger seat sizing was decreed by the likes Boeing/Airbus, usually based on fitting the (?) 95 percentile so you'll have to take sizing up with them.

Funny though how thirty is years ago almost everyone was a fan of airline deregulation in Europe,.now the race to the bottom is biting people in the backside you hear lots of voices wanting regulation brought back in.

Ultimately bigger than standard economy seats are available with many carriers on many routes...but not so much in Shorthaul and people have to be prepared to pay for them.

Double post in error

idk why people are being disingenuous about seatbelts. Megabus/national coaches have seatbelts. That's public transport.

YANBU OP, it's infuriating. Especially in hot weather, reducing the airflow around your body and having someone else's body heat up against you, often sweaty and sticky. It's just awful all around.

People need to book two tickets if they need two spaces.

As I already wrote, I won't be paying more.

And that will never be implemented.

Companies will never be allowed to discriminate against people because of their weight.

At the moment, it is mainly the thin people suffering on airlines as they are getting squashed. If you are happy with the squashing then so be it.

I think they should give an option for larger chairs and suck up some cost to improve customer experience

What if they can't afford two tickets?

They can sue but they won't necessarily win.

https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2000-dec-14-me-65405-story.html

It's from 2000. I can't find a more recent case but would be interested if there is one.

How entitled that you think everyone's cost should go up to accommodate you.

It's only from reading this thread that I see how cruel a lot of thin peoople are.

They see overweight people generally as disgusting with no thought put into how that person got to be that weight

I became overweight after a sexual assault.
I know a man who became overweihht after the death of his daughter.
My colleague is overweight because she has arthritis in her knee

Etc

What if they can't afford one?

Siiiiiiiiigh…..

Then they don’t fly. Flowing over into someone else’s space is selfish. It’s not ‘fat phobic’ to point this out. I’m a rather chubby BMI 25 and airline seats are very roomy width wise. People who take any interests whatsoever in their health should have no problem fitting in them.

I watched my morbidly obese DM count calories every day when I was living with her. She is still morbidly obese. She once plateaued at 400 calories a day. Calorie deficit doesn’t work because some foods lay down as sugar and fat. Reducing those will reduce weight.

I have never counted calories, have no idea how many calories there are in anything and I don’t know if I’m in “calorie deficit”.

I do know that I eat a lot of eggs, vegetables, nuts and seeds, berries and yoghurt and roast meat because that’s what I eat every day between 11 and 7pm. I also know that if I eat crisps or drink alcoholic, which I do occasionally, I don’t lose weight that week. My DH also dieted himself out of Type II diabetes eating a low carb, high fat diet. His blood pressure and risk factors for heart attack and stroke are all down as well.

And of course insulin resistance is contested. The diet industry makes a fortune out of it. Why would they give that up?

Are you actually for real?

I can't believe it!

You want people to be charged more because they are overweight

Using one famous example . Katie Price's disabled son, Harvey, has a disorder that makes him put on weight.

So should he, a disabled man, be charged twice the price, that you are charged?

Fuc...king disgusting

Yet again. What about people who suffer from illnesses that make them out on weight.

The coldness on this thread is astounding

Then don’t be that unhealthy that you need 2 seats ??? It shouldn’t be other peoples responsibility

Oh my god. You couldn't make it up.

For a third time

Many people have illnesses and disabilities that cause them to be overweight. It is not their choice.

It would not be discriminatory to charge larger people for two seats. It would just be a reflection of the amount of size they require to be comfortable (and for their immediate neighbour to be comfortable).

There are facts (that they require more space), and there are biases that don't reflect facts (the bias that they should be charged the same as others to the detriment of their neighbour).

This is firmly the fault of the people building/buying the airplane/bus to specifications that don't suit the top 95th centile of weight.
The fact that obese people are very sensitive to this discussion is understandable, and they deserve to be treated respectfully of course, but it doesn't change anything.

It's the perils of modern life isn't it. We are all squashed in everywhere and individual people's cant be met on such a large scale. I have joint issues, being squashed into a seat beside an overweight person would likely mean I'd be in pain. The overweight person might have their issues that mean they need a seat and a half. Both needs compete with each other and by default in this case the overweight persons need for a seat and half wins out. We'd all love for our needs to be met in every situation but sometimes it just isn't possible.

A parallel situation is someone like my DH who is very tall and always pays extra to sit near the emergency exit because there is more legroom. He's just being practical and accepting the reality of the situation.

No, I think people who take up their space and the space next to them, when that person has also paid for their seat, to pay for the space they need.
If someone fits in a regular seat it’s not an issue.
Airplane travel is an optional activity, you could drive or take a train or ferry.

I don’t know why you think bringing up individual people is relevant or necessary, cheap airfare isn’t a human right.
When I travel with a baby on my lap I pay extra for the privilege, a tall person pays extra for seats with more leg room. These sorts of additional charges already exist.

Agreed. Why should the normal sized person suffer by having half of their seat taken off them through no fault of their own?

Good luck trying to get that to pass.

They'll be hit with discrimination lawsuits.

My mother is overweight because she had polio - the disease - as a child. She was in hospital for a year and one leg is paralysed. She can't exercise so she puts on weight nore quickly than able bodied people do

Yes, they have the right, but is it fair at someone else's discomfort ?

I would be a bit miffed too - I pay the same amount for a seat and she gets hers plus some of mine !

YANBU to have been annoyed by how uncomfortable it made you but YABVVVVU to frame your OP in terms of wondering why she doesn't just magic herself into a healthier body. Of course fat people know they are fat and would like to not be. How ridiculously patronising. She didn't choose to let herself get to that size and you have no idea what practical, mental, medical/hormonal and financial barriers are currently stopping her from improving her health.

That said, she should also have the courtesy to know and adjust her behaviour accordingly if she takes up more than a standard seat-width in public transport. If on a flight she needs to let the airline know that she is wider than the seat and book two seats, and on buses should not sit down next to someone who is already in the window seat of a pair in such a way as to squash them. It's perfectly possible on a bus to sit on the aisle seat sideways (knees in the aisle) so as to not squash another passenger - though obviously that's not possible on a plane.

I honestly can't believe some of the people on here. It's like we are living in the nazi era.
Anyone not young and healthy should be fined.

How lucky for you that you are a normal size and don't suffer from disability, illness or addiction that causes you to gain weight.

Disgusting.