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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to expect my husband to take over after his trip?

54 replies

Pontp · 20/06/2026 18:42

My DH has been in Boston for the World Cup for 10 days now, 3 more to go. I decided to take our 2 year old son on holiday with my mum and auntie as I figured flying solo in the sun would be easier than at home plus juggling work.

I naively thought I’d have a bit more help from my mum and auntie but they just drank wine the whole holiday - fair enough though as it’s their holiday too!

I’m feeling absolutely exhausted as I was up at 6 every morning with DS, made and fed him every meal, put him to bed every night (45 mins of chaos), woke a few times in the night with him and spent all day every day running around after hin (having lots of fun and making memories might I add!). Meanwhile I can’t help but feel this is a huge contrast to DH who has zero responsibilities right now and is lying in til 10 every morning.

The reason for my post is I’m wondering what is reasonable when he gets home. I want to hand him DS and have him do every bedtime, every wake through the night and every morning wake until I’ve caught up on some of my exhaustion.

I mentioned this to my mum but she said it was harsh because he was losing a nights sleep on his way home due to a night flight and he will be jet lagged

AIBU?

OP posts:
ColdAsAWitches · 22/06/2026 23:53

desperatemum1234 · 22/06/2026 23:08

No - he went on holiday, OP parented a toddler solo in a place other than home. A holiday with a child is NOT a holiday.

Absolute bullshit. I've taken my kids away on my own lots of times. It's definitely a holiday.

KnittyKnotty · 22/06/2026 23:58

Next time stay at home and once he returns, leave child with him and have a nice girls only holiday with Mum and Aunt.

Holidays with little kids are too exhausting!

MarmaladeSandwich7 · 25/06/2026 08:15

Pontp · 20/06/2026 18:42

My DH has been in Boston for the World Cup for 10 days now, 3 more to go. I decided to take our 2 year old son on holiday with my mum and auntie as I figured flying solo in the sun would be easier than at home plus juggling work.

I naively thought I’d have a bit more help from my mum and auntie but they just drank wine the whole holiday - fair enough though as it’s their holiday too!

I’m feeling absolutely exhausted as I was up at 6 every morning with DS, made and fed him every meal, put him to bed every night (45 mins of chaos), woke a few times in the night with him and spent all day every day running around after hin (having lots of fun and making memories might I add!). Meanwhile I can’t help but feel this is a huge contrast to DH who has zero responsibilities right now and is lying in til 10 every morning.

The reason for my post is I’m wondering what is reasonable when he gets home. I want to hand him DS and have him do every bedtime, every wake through the night and every morning wake until I’ve caught up on some of my exhaustion.

I mentioned this to my mum but she said it was harsh because he was losing a nights sleep on his way home due to a night flight and he will be jet lagged

AIBU?

Your DH aside, what stands out to me is the complete lack of help from your Mum & Aunty! Yes it was their holiday too but they could have given you a break from time to time. 2 year olds can be exhausting!

DollydaydreamTheThird · 25/06/2026 18:22

It infuriates me how little some women expect men to do. They are both parents. She would never be allowed to go off for 2 weeks on her own while he is left holding the baby. So when he gets home he can absolutely pull his finger out and do some actual parenting while OP has a break. Any man who can disappear off and leave his family for that long on a jolly is a waste of space anyway.

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