To think being well-adjusted is a privilege no one acknowledges enough?

[HealthyHomesMatter]

So many “personality traits” are just trauma responses.

I don't know anyone who is 'well-adjusted' - I know plenty of people who have had a lot of shit to deal with who have made the best of it. I think that's pretty standard.

What research has shown is that if you have a foundation - a parent, a grandparent, some reliable adult - who is deeply connected to you, providing ongoing support, no matter how flakey that support is, you have at least the baseline requirements for making something of your life. For that reason, people who enter foster care early, move around a lot and have contact with their birth family severed struggle massively - many end up in jail, with addictions and/or have ongoing issues.

So, if you had a family of some sort, that stayed the same from birth-18, even if that family was pretty fucked up, you were doing well. It is then up to you to make something of that and that's where outcomes vary massively.

I find the assumption that people who had a tertible childhood can choose to be happy quite astounding tbh. Yes you can choose to bury your feelings bit of course you are not going to be as happy if you were beaten, shamed or put down.
Easier to be positive and do well in life if you were treated kindly and suppirted

Sorry, who are we blaming now?

I consider myself well adjusted but I have siblings that clearly are not. What happened there?

I am thankful of my perception of my upbringing but do listen and empathise with my siblings perceptions of their experience.

I am thankful for being allowed to be a free thinker, for being given a level of decision making and autonomy when I was a teenager because I did have thoughts and ideas that my parents didn’t seem to have from my perspective but they never imposed on me a view or ideology.

I do actually mentally give thanks to my upbringing for that.

Talk about contradictory.

You do want them to do something: to acknowledge it.
And precisely how would they do that so you would notice and they would pass your test?

Perhaps @Backedoffhackedoff just wants them to understand of heir level of privilege. That would make fortunate people less judgmental to others. That's what I think anyway.
Not all fortunates are like that but I think some can be.

I am white

do you know whether or not I acknowledge my white privilege?

no. It’s the same thing. It is not something you display to the world, but comes though quietly in your values actions and decision making.

More contradiction,

You “don’t display it” but it’s somehow evident.in what you do?
How does that work?

Not sure why you brought your colour into this, this thread is about the apparent privilege of being well-adjusted.

I don’t think this is contradiction in terms of you don’t understand nuance- or maybe much at all tbh.

Are you saying unless your acknowledgement is immediately visable to everyone - including random strangers online- you aren’t acknowledging it? Try and make some sense please

I agree. Self confidence and self belief are so important aren’t they.👍

Oh dear.

I refer you my post of 20.03.