AIBU to think my widowed male friend fancies me

[playthepianomakemeswoon123]

A fairly new friend of mine (M65) invited me to stay over, (seperate bedrooms) because he knew I was having a really tough time. His wife died about 3 years ago. We all went out for the evening with my parents who were weirdly visiting and had a good laugh together.
When we got back to his house around 11pm, he sat at the piano and gave me a private recital. At one point he said “Oh, this one’s called <myname> actually. It felt very intimate but I sort of spaced out as I do that with emotional intensity. Now kicking myself.
Now I’m wondering… does this sound like he fancies me too, or am I reading way too much into a kind gesture from a friend?

Yes... but why would he do that?

Very romantic, especially when they are alone together late at night, and she's staying over. pretty sure he was coming on to you OP.

Blokes don't randomly do stuff like this just for friends.

Of course he fancies you. I'm so surprised anyone is in here saying he doesn't. Ask if you can go round to listen to him play some more songs for you. Take wine.

But would he have played michael jackson's ben to a man called ben

Awww, that's so mean! I think it sounds kinda sweet!

🎵'My My MYYYY Delilah!' 🎵

🎵'Layla! ya got me on my knees...' 🎵

🎵'Why dontcha come on over Valerie.......! 🎵

Whichever girls name it is, it's cute. 😆

😂

How recent was this? Did you you message
him when you got back to thank him for hosting and say had a lovely time? That would give him th opportunity to arrange something else.

I think he’s keen ☺️

No, I went a bit weird and second guessed myself and just said thanks for having me over

What if it was a woman?
He's not a blokey twatty bloke if you know what i mean

Can’t say but iin your shoes I’d ask him out for a thank you meal and see how it goes. Flirt like mad.

Next time just the two of you. Good wine, some nibbles, good dress. See how it goes. Good luck! I might even be tempted to add stunning underwear.

Life is too short in your 50s not to take a chance.

@playthepianomakemeswoon123 I would probably say that he does. However, whilst he’s fit now, he may not be in 10 years time, you could be a carer at 65. I’m not far off 55, I’d be considering whether I’d want to spend my future time like this. Personally I wouldn’t so wouldn’t be dating someone 10 years older.

That song was about a rat.

Oh God, the private recital would make me cringe

A couple of men have done that for me and they fancied me.

Can I politely ask how you’ve got to 55 without recognising if a man fancies you or not? Have you had many relationships?

And yes, I don't think inviting you to stay over and playing a song with your name in it on the piano is the kind of thing men do for women they just want to be platonic friends with, so yeah, I think he's interested. But you say you may not be in the right place yet?

Sounds like a lovely gesture. If you’re both single, then just take it slowly, let the relationship develop, or not, and see where life takes you. 😊

Of course he’s interested!

Send him a text, or a card, saying you’ve been thinking about how much you enjoyed the evening and especially appreciated listening to the piano. Put in a phrase like “what a magical evening!”
Say you’d love to do it again sometime.

Then either leave the ball firmly in his court, or invite him to join you for a meal or out to a concert or something.

Widowers are always looking for a replacement female to meet their needs and usually one who is 10+ years younger. He sounds a bit creepy to me but if you like him go for it.

And played it for her. That’s the key bit.

Maybe he’s wooing you 🙂

Nothing about going out jointly with your parents, being invited for a sleepover and then subjected to a private piano recital says ‘romance’ to me!

What the hell? Why is a friend playing a song, an ick? And where does OP say he was showing off? God, people are so negative about everything.

That alone isn’t a sign of anything other than him pointing out the song title is your name… It’s usually pretty clear when a man fancies you, they’re not very good at hiding it.

That made me laugh so much