AIBU to ask if you are worrying this week and if so what about?

[girlfriend44]

To ask what are you worrying about most this week? That's if you are if course

We all have worries don't we? What's the biggest stressor/thing on your mind at the moment?
Are you one of the lucky and rare ones that never worry?
If so how do you do it?

I’m so worried about my lovely Dad who has recently been diagnosed with dementia

Of course they can p-off and mind their own business but if you do want to avoid the qns a pack of tortillas and maybe a lettuce… makes your dinner go a bit further and looks more lunch-y.

I’m worried my body just keeps failing in different ways; my NHS record reads like a multi-episode arc of Casualty and at this point I’m just rather battered.
I’m worried every Sunday thanks this week’s work will be as frustrating as the last, though I’m thankful for my job.
I am also concerned my BiL won’t pay us (really me) back the money he needed to cover his mortgage a few months ago, when he’s now making plans to travel all summer.. and I am worried this will be a source of stress between me and DH as bil has form for being a selfish prick.

Big hugs to everyone who's worrying, especially those of you with such enormous concerns.

I struggle with anxiety a lot anyway but at the moment it's pretty high. Main issues:

Dd2 mid A levels, super stressed and diagnosed recently with PCOS/PMOS. Her weight is a huge concern, nothing she tries seems to work and although we now have a 'reason', even the docs seem to be shrugging at her and saying nothing much tends to work. So bad for her in every sense and she's struggling.

Dh currently appealing a decision against dropping his hours to semi retire which he made financial decisions about following manager's verbal OK.

Dd1 finishing uni and getting her placement details for her 12 month next step and settling into that (ND so everything's a challenge around change).

Very elderly parents 2.5 hours away who need me much more than I can give atm. (Self employed and money pressures).

Loads of driving anxiety atm to add to everything else which I'm finding really hard after being hit by a lorry nearly 2 years ago. Also struggling with a lot of neck and shoulder pain ever since - x ray tomorrow to fit in with work.

It's all pretty low key in the scheme of things but especially since hitting perimenopause, I often feel like I'll be fighting endless worry for the rest of my life and absolutely hate the idea. The only thing that seems to change is the details of the worries themselves, sometimes they're bigger than other times. But I never feel at peace, always waiting for the next crisis.

My husband has moved abroad ahead of us so I am full of worry!
How will his first day go? Will he be really lonely without us knowing no one in a foreign country? Will the kids like it? Will I manage solo parenting for 3 months? Will our rental work out ok and will I get the house in the right state for it within 4 weeks? Are we making a huge mistake?
my mind is going 1000mph constantly

F

Im poorly with a chest infection its not bad enough for any treatment but I've coughed my insides up for 4 days and nights!, and I just feel I can't physically go another day like this.
Im resting taking pain killers hot drinks lots of fluids. Just worried how long this will go on for im utterly exhausted now. Not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things but it is to me.

I am meant to be starting a new job but not heard from them for a while after start date was postponed. I need to start asap as redundancy pay running out.
I'm also worried about DS3 doing final exams which he is stressing over and then will be graduating. I am worried about no jobs etc. Also worried that dd has just started driving, she is miles away in another city and I'm trying not to worry but it's hard.

Who said it isn’t bad enough for treatment?

Have you been to the doctor?

Son being released from prison tomorrow and worried about the future.
I am hoping and praying with all my being that it will be different this time.

Currently worrying about my relationship and whether it’s ever going to get better or if I should start planning to separate. But sadly that needs it’s own thread 🫤

Anxiety is through the roof, I’m currently signed off Work with anxiety disorder – well paid public sector job which I don’t honestly think I am able to return to. I just feel like I’m not good enough and I worry that I won’t be able to get another job.

This exactly, I could have written this word for word. I don’t know what to suggest as I certainly haven’t found the answer but I see you. I lack the words to describe the profound loneliness, anxiety, stress, shame and misery my worries about my child bring. My head is an intolerable place to be and I feel like I’m constantly about to break with it all. And running through my head in a constant, never ceasing stream are the words ‘you will die one day, what will become of your child’. I can’t get away from it.

@Shuntsarentscary and @TheFairCat I'm sorry you two are struggling with such worries for your children's future. I have worked in care (though granted adult care not childrens') for a decade and I have only ever heard of one time where a staff member was being investigated for mistreatment of patients. I also knew the two staff very well, had worked with them for years and knew (with a fair degree of certainty) that it was another patient misreading the situation.

The overwhelming majority of people working in care do it because they care. I can assure you that your children will be safe in the future. There are of course sometimes investigations in private residences/care homes (I appreciate where I am in the hospital it might be different), and yes, some may have a culture of abuse, but I would say this is extremely rare, having also worked in care homes for the elderly and in the community.

The chance of staff getting attacked is far far higher. I myself have been bitten and had a finger broken (by two different patients) and been hit out at, had kicks thrown and threatened by 100's of patients over the years.

It can be a daily occurence with elderly people when coupled with confusion/delerium/dementia and other reasons for a lack of capacity and even simply because they are scared and unwell. I also know every hca/carer/nurse has their own stories of being attacked on shift, some badly. We all manage to put it behind us and treat patients well despite this.

It's hard because no-one can guarantee the safety of anyone or the intentions of another person, but I just wanted to reassure you that of the 1000's of carers, nurses and other staff I've worked with over the years, almost every one did the work because they cared and were trustworthy.

Exactly. Obviously if you are waiting on an oncologist phone call or similar you will be worried. But outside of that big stuff, worrying is such destructive way to live.
If you can fix, influence, change it then do so. If you can’t put it out of your mind.

Ive never had a day without worrying about something or other.

I can worry about what other people are going through too.
Just read about a mum I used to know who had a lovely son that she was close too and he died recently. Just feeling so sorry for her and the situation.

Life ain't easy.

I don’t normally worry much at all, although do have (many!) stressors but this week, I’m worried. I’m in hospital with a suspected bleed on the brain. Yay.

Worrying about my sister, she had a scan on her spine and unusual lung changes were noted on the report.

I worry every day too. Small things and big things. I know it doesn’t change anything, but it’s a way of life now. If I felt I didn’t have anything to worry about, that would worry me too.

My husbands been really ill with sepsis caused by appendicitis, he’s back at home after being in hospital for quite a while. He initially passed all the screeners for organ damage etc, but its caused a thankfully temporary heart condition, at first his ejection fraction was only 32%, but after todays check up it has started increasing. He has had it before, appendicitis not sepsis but that was treated with antibiotics, he’s had to have surgery this time. So now we’re both in the burst appendix club. So its been a rubbish few weeks and really stressful.

He’s just knackered, he’s also bored out of his mind so he has his first tiny trip out to a local coffee shop. I know as soon as hes feeling a little bit better he‘ll be stupid and over do it.

I’ve been waiting since Jan for HR to sort out a managed move. A replacement was found for my post and was given a start date before HR took any action. I’ve moved into a new post on a temp basis until HR go through their process. This current post will cease to exist in March.

I requested a move as my mother has a terminal illness and a second life limiting illness. I don’t have timescales for when she is going to die, and I’ve tried to explain I need to move into a post whilst things are relatively stable, I honestly just want to be in a job, settled and for my team to get to know me before the inevitable happens.

Apparently I’m being unreasonable and now the deputy director is pissed at me for pushing the move, “as he’s bent over backwards” to create “work for me”.

I live in a constant state of worry and guilt.

My elderly mum was diagnosed with a very aggressive form of leukaemia on Monday. She is too frail for chemo, so time is very limited. I worry whether they'll be able to keep her comfortable and pain-free and also worry that she'll be stubborn and want to stay at home. My poor dad has been doing so.much for her over the last 6 months as her health has declined rapidly, and I worry about them both. My son was also in the middle of exams when we heard the news, so it has been a very tough week.

I'm waiting to hear back about two jobs that I have reached the final interviewing stage for. Exciting, but it is going to involve telling my family that I'm walking away from the family business and leaving them to sort it out. I've done all I can and it can't be my responsibility any more. I don't know what's going to happen.

Ovarian cancer and if I should leave my husband before I start treatment or suck it up till after as technically it’s easier.