New neighbour has asked us to stop construction on new home until daughter has finished exams.

[Grammarninja]

This is such a tricky one for me. We bought a house that needed a complete overhaul a year ago. We've finally gotten through architects, planning permission and trying to find affordable builders etc. It has been stressful.
We broke ground this week and the neighbours have asked us to stop until dd has finished her exams in 3 weeks.
I really feel for the family and can't imagine how upsetting it must be for them at this crucial time (we had no idea they had a child sitting exams this summer). My husband has offered them an office at his work around the corner to facilitate study. I wouldn't mind postponing if it wouldn't cost us 30k to do so as builders are working to a set time frame. I wouldn't even mind the extra costs we'd incur through having to stay in our current accommodation for another month if it weren't for the builders' costs which we simply can't afford.
I'm worried now that we're going to start off on a terrible note with our new neighbours which would be such a shame considering my current neighbours are like family.
Are we being unreasonable to continue with the build in these circumstances?

We rented a flat beside an empty lot which rapidly turned into a year long ground up construction of a new building. I didn't love it, but It was fine. I didn't use noise cancelling headphones, worked from home and it was totally ok. As a suggestion, maybe offer noise cancelling headphones to help her study. You've already offered a place to do it. It isn't ideal, but it's life. You aren't being unreasonable.

Don’t engage with this madness. If you need to have the building work done now, get it done.

Good lord how ridiculous. My son managed to work with building work next door and he did very well. It’s only the final few exams left anyway. Most are done now! Mine is now doing his L6th exams and it’s still going on. It’s life!
many Kids revise in far worse circumstances — in noisy homes with the TV blaring, barking dogs, shouting. Some share a bedroom or dont even have a decent table to work on.
Builders outside working 9-5 with frequent breaks is hardly the worst thing in the world. I’m not sure how anyone who can’t cope with taking a few Revision cards down the Library is going to manage uni finals or in the modern workplace tbh.

You sound as batshit as the OP’s neighbours do 🤣

Having construction work done on your home is a normal part of life.

The student can go to school/college/local library during the day to revise. Or she can revise in the evenings and at weekends.

God...I'm getting flashbacks to my own O levels. Old, old house with low ceilings. The little tv in the kitchen was about 1 foot from my bedroom floor. I could ear the muffled talking. I can't stand that noise to this day.
Oh and my little sisters thought it was oh so fun to ride round and round the house and then ring their bells and piss about right under my window.
A levels I did spend a lot of time in the library.

I wasnt comparing it to a building site

I was comparing it to other libraries where no child studying for gcses apparently could ever be expected to go to revise because checks notes....

....they'd have to carry their own books there and....
....lack of snacks

I suspect that the reason they will be so put out is that they are naturally like that and you would never have been friends - there would always have been something.

Which is sad, as I admire your commitment to community - but it's not your fault and it's not something that you could have done anything about.

suggest to her parents that you gift her some good noise cancelling headphones?

Mug

Surely she just goes into school or college, or take your husband up on his offer of a workspace at his office. They aren't going to be working antisocial hours so it isn't like you are disturbing her sleep. It isn't great timing but you obviously can't put it on hold and cost yourself 30k. She has other options, they are being unreasonable to ask, everyone knows you can't just cancel a big job and reschedule when you have lots of trades, contractors and materials to co-ordinate.

Yes, no offence but the 80s were a long time ago, it has changed quite a bit and is incredibly competitive, GCSEs can mean you do or don't get an internship for example or even a uni course if it's competitive or actually to do the A levels at a sixth form college that is oversubscribed.

It's really not unfair to expect a teenager to go to a library, into school or to a friend or family members to study.

A teenager should be able to cope without favourite snacks and if they want to chat to family members they can text them.

A laptop and books, notes etc shouldn't be too big of a burden, as they'll be revising for just one or two subjects.

I hate to break it to you, but for a bright kid who's going onto A levels, GCSEs aren't really that important.

So you think the average public library if it is even open has the same culture to studying as a university library at uni that is costing a student a fortune? You think that any building work planned in a public library or next door is stopped in exam times?

Tell upur neighbour if their kid doesnt know what they need to know by now. In june of year 11.

Then theyll never know it

No one compared a university library to a building site. They compared a university library to a school library/public library/office space that the child in could use to revise in.

I completely understand where you're coming from. This is why I can't sleep at the moment. Such a hard time in life for a teenager. It's actually Leaving Cert btw. (Ireland); I know a few people have been wondering.

Ffs i didnt mention building works in a library stop conflating

GCSE grades absolutely are important on 2026, how old are you?

I feel like I'm on another planet reading these replies. Posters really expect OP to lose 30k because of the entitled neighbours. It's unfortunate but that's life, don't beat yourself up looking for ways to make them happy. You deserve your new house, you've waited long enough. Think about your own family, you offered a solution and that was generous enough and a lot more than what most people would do.

Honestly ‘they won’t be able to revise properly if they don’t have access to the right snacks’ is an absolute new level of bat shittery that has me shaking my head in disbelief.

Right?

New personal fave.

Failed my GCSEs because i could only find beef and tomato pot noodle not chicken and mushroom

its a good life lesson for the child that sometimes life throws a curveball. admittedly it was 15 years ago now I sat mine but I revised at school in the library or the town library, at home, at grandparents etc.

Nope. I’ve had 2 kids and one or both of them have had exams every year from 2022 until now and now one at Uni, so I’m very well aware of the challenges of exams. I’m also aware that no one else can reasonably be expected to give a shit about my children’s exams. There are other options. Just because they aren’t as convenient as being at home doesn’t mean they aren’t viable if home is too noisy. I
bet you wouldn’t be losing £30k for the sake of a neighbour’s kid either.

No, you are wholly missing the point and I can see you don't have the first clue about a university library as of course they are good places to study in you're fucking paying thousands for the privilege! For a start some are open for 24hrs, 7 days a week and others are open until midnight a bit different to trying to find a peaceful spot with a table not just a chair, whilst the toddler group is singing, "Wind the Bobbin up" in the background!

Op, you seem like a very kind person who likes to please people

Do not get dragged into this absurdity. Thats what it is.

Unless you're making noise at unsociable hours you crack on.

You dont owe them office space

You dont owe them noise cancelling headphones

You sure as shit dont owe them a delay

You dont owe them a solution

If at 16 their child cannot problem solve and find a solution to a minor inconvenience life has brought their way then thats not on you

And like i said earlier. It is june. If i recall my last gcse was mid june.

All her revision should be long done. If she doesn't know it now that's her own fault