My (same sex) friend and I kissed

[shallowheart10]

Posting in this forum for traffic.

Feeling a bit confused on what to do next. Both me and my friend are married with kids of the same age. We met at work around 2 years ago but we no longer work together.

I went to her house at the weekend for a drink and takeaway. We ended up kissing. I enjoyed it. I’m married and I do truly love my husband so it’s not like I would leave him or my family. I know I can’t really explore this for all of those reasons.

I feel confused because I am in a happy marriage but feel like I probably do have some sort
of feelings alongside. Never been with a woman before.

needed to vent as I only have chat gpt, can’t say it to anyone else

Either leave your husband or stop seeing your friend.

Cheaters are despicable and can devastate partners and kids for life.

Stop the affair with your friend. Now. Simple as that.

Aw, that is unsettling. maybe give it some time, and have conversations with your friend and with your husband to figure out what it means and what you want to do.

If your husband told you he snogged someone else would you want to help him 'figure out what it means' when he cheats on you?

Would you be ok with your husband kissing his mate? What would you want him to do next if he did? That's probably what you should do.

You could always tell your husband you’ve been hating some feelings about kissing women see what he makes of it he might encourage it (probably only if he’s allowed to watch)

to not cheat you need to not be alone with that friend again, to avoid temptation

Cheating is cheating whatever the sex of your lover. Just stop.

You've cheated so husband needs to know so he can decide whether to leave you or not.

op have you spoke to friend since? what happened after you kissed?
as with anyone, you need space between you. don't see her for now, Def not alone and take time to work out what you want. do you want to do it again? regret it?

How would YOU feel if your DH kissed a man?

Did she taste like cherry chapstick?

How would you feel if your DH kissed someone else? Male or female makes no difference.

For ages I thought it was 'the taste of her cherry chopstick'.

Is this a reverse?

F

We haven’t spoken about it since. A couple of texts back and forth but not mentioning it.

I feel maybe it was a drunken one off and I should forget about it. I don’t plan to cheat on my husband (albeit people may consider that I already have). Maybe I will message and confront it

Husband needs to know about the cheating so he can make an informed decision.

Of course you cheated. How would you feel if he kissed someone else.

If your marriage is important to you then I think you need to stop the friendship. No texting, no meeting up etc.

‘We ended up kissing’
Who initiated it - sounds like your first time. Does she make a habit of this?
A moment of madness or something that is going to recur?
I wouldn’t rush off to confess until you’ve got a bit more clarity

I just told my husband. Literally blurted out as we got into bed. His reply

’i knew she fancied you. Ok well do you fancy her?’

I said no. He replied ‘cool, fine then’.

that’s literally it

I’m not so sure that’s ’literally it’. He may be that one in a million who can shrug off his wife kissing someone else (maybe he doesn’t feel threatened because it was a woman) but I bet he’s going to be thinking about it a lot. I know it would drive a wedge between me and my DH as trust is fundamental.

Sounds its sorted marriage wise OP. What are your feelings about it? I do find all these 'you cheated and he needs to know so he can leave' posters bizarre. It's just a drunken snog. Your parents were doing it at the works Christmas drinks every year in the 70s and 80s, and then going into work after the holidays and never mentioning it again.

He’ll be thinking about it a lot
Probably suggest inviting her over one evening