AIBU to think this guest's lunch behaviour was rude?

[embroideredpanda]

What would you think if you were at a celebratory lunch and a guest did the following:

1. discussed whether their niece (2 weeks postpartum) might get divorced as she and her husband have not been getting on since the baby arrived
2. when asked about a different recent social event, got out the receipt from that evening and complained about the small portions and cost of the wine, going through the cost of each item, including the extras for coffee modifications
3. Put food from their own plate onto the plate of the guest they knew the least (without asking), insisting they could never eat that much

YABU - normal behaviour
YANBU - rude behaviour

Bit odd, but I'd laugh it off. Doesn't seem worth starting a thread about it!

Well it has obviously annoyed you!
People do all kinds at social events. Perhaps she started celebrating too much too early.

Bonkers behaviour. No boundaries or discretion or sense of what's interesting to talk about.

The plate thing is unacceptable, but I don’t really understand what’s awful about the other two things?

Yes a bit odd but I’m not sure I’d say rude.

Yes she rude. and just weird.

Doesn’t sound like you’re very fond of this guest but also doesn’t sound like you needed to make a thread about it tbh, nothing of significance happened

Sounds like an elderly relative of mine. Doesn’t realise they are being rude!

2 and 3 were bad manners/rude. If they were amongst friends and someone asked about their family, I don't think 1 was rude (although if I were her niece, I'd be angry she was gossiping and speculating about the state of my marriage to other people).

Hardly worth a mention.

I wouldn’t say it was rude, just a bit odd.

Nothing wrong with 1 and 2. 3 is weird behaviour if it was done when the plates were first brought out. Disgusting if it was left overs after they'd been eating from the plate.

The plate thing is weird.

But I’d rather be sitting next to her than some oh so polite dullard. She sounds like a character.

1. no real issue.
2. no real issue.
3. unacceptable.

Are you the niece? Or was the niece present?

2 is ok, unless the meal was paid for by someone else, especially that person was present, as that's pretty rude.

3 is just odd, but not something I'd be particularly bothered about (unless they were allergic to whatever it was that was put on their plate, obviously!)

Wow! I’m shocked that any of you think this behaviour is acceptable 😲

speaks volumes perhaps.

They just sound very boring and gossipy and moving the food is odd.

You post is far ruder and more unpleasant than anything the lunch guest did 🤷🏻‍♀️

1 is just gossip. Many people gossip. If I didn’t know the niece or her husband well then I’d wonder why something thought I gave a shit about their relationship, but it’s pretty benign.

2 is a bit of a boring conversation, but pretty meh.

3 is rude, unless the person whose plate she took food from was her child or partner and it’s normal for them.

Need to know who else was at the event.

1. People speculate all the time about other people's relationships.
2. Maybe it was a complete rip off. If she still had the receipt, presumably she'd paid. So, far enough.
3. Too many unknowns here - eaten/uneaten, guest saw/didn't see etc.

3 is very rude, 1 just idle gossip (unless niece was at the meal and then it was spectacularly rude) and 2 just sounds very dull.

Re; Wildleader post How is it ruder and more unpleasant than the lunch guest? Putting food on someone's plate without asking? So that's acceptable if you are on the receiving end?🤔

It’s your mum isn’t it?

Moving the food to someone else Patricia odd but the rest isn’t worth worrying about

What? I’ve clearly said that the plate thing was unacceptable. But implying that not finding the other interactions appalling “speaks volumes” about us…that’s just nasty.