AIBU to refuse removing lilies because next door’s cats keep coming in?

[TooHotToCloseThem]

Next door neighbours cats frequently cause a nuisance to me. Pooing in my garden , getting in the house if back door or windows open etc. I shoo them out or pick up the poo it annoys me but I tolerate it.

She has messaged me today (she can see directly into my conservatory from her garden and she is always staring ) asking me to shut my windows / door or to get rid of my flowers as they are poisonous to cats! They are 2 bunches of Lillies that family got me for my birthday yesterday! I also have some in a pot in the garden and various other flowers. I’ve messaged back and said maybe she needs to make her cats indoor cats as I’m not changing anything and that the cats will be fine as I’ve had the same flowers in the garden for a month and they’ve not gone near that pot (dig up my other ones though to use as litter trays!) so I’m not getting rid of my ones in vases in my own home just in case her cats come in !!!!!

I've owned cats forever and have never had one that showed even the remotest of interest in lilies. They've eaten plenty of other inappropriate crap, but never lilies

Your neighbour is deranged.

It's the owner's responsibility to keep her cat safe, not yours.

Cats are not as stupid as people think. I have always had cats, often grown things that can be toxic to them, but apart from getting stoned on catnip, they never go near the things.

Not your problem.

She sounds absolutely mental. It's bad enough asking you to move the outdoor lilies, but asking you to shut your doors and windows or get rid of flowers in your own house - just in case her cats come in - is just crazy.

😆

Does she keep an eye on where her cats wander to, and what plants other people have in their garden?

You first of all need a blind or some other way of stopping her staring in at you when you're in the conservatory. That would be my no 1 priority here. I'd ignore her and everything else and carry on with my life lived according to my own tastes and enjoyment.

This is perfect

I love cats but you’re absolutely in the right. Their cat, their problem.

I have day lilies in my garden, unfortunately they have never poisoned any of my neighbours four cats that insist on using my vegetable patch as a toilet.

Your neighbour is clearly a complete CF.

Is she going to ban drivers within a certain radius of her home…far more chance of a cat being hit by a car than being poisoned by the flowers in your home.

The entitlement of some people is mind boggling

My neighbour tried this with us, however we planted more lily’s in our back garden as our son is highly allergic to ALL animal dander
and we had to put measures in place to
keep our garden animal free.

She was most put out, that her cats (3) weren't free to roam in our garden, to potentially send our child into anaphylactic shock 😳

She said she would “report us” & “make us pay for her bet bills”… she was most outraged that we replied advising she was responsible for her animals not us!

Hasn’t spoke to us in over 10 years… she now has 5 cats.

Yanbu, she's crackers obviously.

In other news, I had no idea lilies are poisonous to cats, we have some in our garden and occasionally have them in the house. I'll go ahead and avoid them from now on but sometimes I'm amazed my cat has made it to 18 given my general incompetence.....

Happy Birthday, how lovely to get some lillies! Oh, and yes your neighbour is absolutely nuts!

Yabu to the cat - it could suffer an agonising death by poisoning from the lillies, not sure why the pp are suggesting get more lillies, it is the cat who will be in agony.

Yanbu the neighbour is wrong, she should be cat proofing her fences so the cat can't leave her garden, so it is safe from lillies, roads and will no longer use your garden as a litter tray!

I assumed they knew to avoid them as they’ve literally pooed in every other plant pot I have but not the Lillies!

YANBU and I’m a cat owner and absolutely adore cats.

Cheeky cow!

So££ing cats crap in my garden. I hadn’t thought of lilies but I think I’ll get some 🤙

I always pull the stamens out, using a tissue. It stops me accidentally staining things, but it will also avoid killing the cats accidentally. The neighbour won’t be able to see, so she’ll still worry!

I love lilies-and Cats, my Cats have never gone near my flowers. Shes being a CF.

I’d get privacy film so she can’t see into your conservatory for a start. Who stands staring into someone else’s house? That’s unhinged.

I'm about cat lover and even I think she's batshit!!!
What next? Asking people to not drive within a 2 mile radius of her house in case they decide to run into the road??
If you have cats and let them roam freely, then unfortunately you need to accept the consequences of them being unsafe when not on your own property.
Happy birthday and enjoy your flowers!

Dear neighbour: I'm allergic to cats, please would you get rid of your cats as they are poisonous to me....

@TooHotToCloseThem im a cat lover and she’s ridiculous to ask.

have you tried a noise deterrent in the garden? My folks have one and it works wonders.

I also picked up a load of pine cones and twisty branches from my mini cherry blossom and other plants (including roses) to make cat deterrents to stop them pooing in my beds and it’s worked so far. I lay it out so they can’t get through them.

in pots you could have twisted branches and wind catchers/ribbons etc in them to make them more decorative if they are in more visible spots?

Reasonable, fair and equitable...no one of sound mind could complain about that.