AIBU to refuse removing lilies because next door’s cats keep coming in?

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Next door neighbours cats frequently cause a nuisance to me. Pooing in my garden , getting in the house if back door or windows open etc. I shoo them out or pick up the poo it annoys me but I tolerate it.

She has messaged me today (she can see directly into my conservatory from her garden and she is always staring ) asking me to shut my windows / door or to get rid of my flowers as they are poisonous to cats! They are 2 bunches of Lillies that family got me for my birthday yesterday! I also have some in a pot in the garden and various other flowers. I’ve messaged back and said maybe she needs to make her cats indoor cats as I’m not changing anything and that the cats will be fine as I’ve had the same flowers in the garden for a month and they’ve not gone near that pot (dig up my other ones though to use as litter trays!) so I’m not getting rid of my ones in vases in my own home just in case her cats come in !!!!!

She sounds like the person in charge of our local cat charity who won't re-home to certain roads because they are too busy.
Cats wonder. Ignore her.

Yanbu about the ones in the house, shes crazy to ask. But id never have them in my garden. There's so many other beautiful flowers to pick from, I dont see the need to have ones that could cause one of the most agonising slow deaths to someone's pet.

I would do that anyway, as the pollen can stain clothes.

You neighbour may suggest next that you also get rid of;
Onions and Garlic,
Chocolate and Caffeine,
Grapes and Raisins,
Human Medications,
Household Chemicals,
and Pesticides.
All of which can be poisonous to cats.

Probably best to sever the electricty supply too.

I love cats more than people but she is being massively unreasonable

I've always had cats ever since I left home, (I'm now in my fifties), and I have nearly always had lilies in the house too. Yes, bad cat owner - however, even my shit for brains cats have never managed to kill themselves with them. If she's that worried, she needs to ensure her cats don't come onto your property, not ask you to proof your property for her cats.

She is bonkers 🤪🤣 I wouldn’t be removing anything because mad cat lady told me to .

You are both being unreasonable.

If you train your cat well they will ‘go’ in their own garden. Mine did. We created a few places in it which she used. I also trained her to cover up after she had been. As a kitten just moving her paws over the litter so she understood what to do.
You cannot train a cat which gardens to visit ( not going to the loo). They do not respect humans legal boundaries. And we cannot expect them to do so !
Indoor cats are a sadness. They are not designed to be kept indoors.

We share this planet with a wide range of species and life other than ourselves. We have done enough damage to vast number of species. All usually for our own selfish wishes.

I doubt the cat will eat the flowers. Try and get on.

I’ve had cats for the last 20 years and lily’s are my favourite flowers. Rarely without a vase of them in the house. None of my cats have ever had a problem with them although I have come from work to find an overturned vase as they seemed to love to use them as back scratchers!
Your neighbour is batshit

I’m terrible. I have cats and often have Lillys. So far never has a cat gone near them when they have made their way into a room with them.

Got our first cat in 1992 and the last one died last year aged 20. I've always had lillies and none of the cats has ever gone near the cut ones in the house or the many Stargazer lillies planted in the garden. They all seemed to know to avoid them. Your neighbour is a nutter and you should carry on with your life however you please! (Oh I have one flower bed where the cats liked to poo and the plants there are especially vigorous! Dig it in and at least get a little benefit from it!)

Is she going to inspect all of your other neighbours houses for risks to her cats too? She is BU.

Another cat owner/lily lover here, I would be arranging weekly deliveries of armfuls of lilies.

She's Batshit.

We've got two cats. I wouldn't dream of asking my neighbours to change their garden arrangements or planting to accommodate our animals.

Cat owner here but YANBU, she needs to have house cats or put up a cat fence if she worries that much about where they go.
Mine is a house cat, it’s safer. He’s 15. His sister lived to 16 and died from arthritis (PTS as she was in pain).

Does she want you to stop driving in case it gets run over?

Yes plant some in the garden!!!

I’m a cat owner whose cat goes outdoors. You’re not being unreasonable. It’s a risk people take when they let their cat roam and I include myself in that. I avoid lillies in the house and the garden but what flowers others have is entirely up to them.

I’d tell her to fuck off no.

She’s quite mad - her cats to keep safe.
But, it’s not actually the Lilly thats dangerous - unless they started eating them (unlikely) it’s the yellow pollen from the stamen, the cat gets the pollen on their fur and ingests it when they lick their coats. It’s quite easy to cut them off and remove majority of the danger - my SIL is a florist and they do this for weddings as it stops people staining their clothes if they brush past.

He sounds like an absolute lunatic. Vile man.

🤣 This emoji is perfect for such eventualities. Don't waste your time with words, just a laughing emoji.

We do share the planet with a wide range of wildlife under threat.

So it seems a shame to keep animals as pets that take a terrible toll on wild garden birds and frogs.

Sick to death of other peoples pets shitting in my garden and killing wildlife.

I don’t believe that all the dead birds are down to cats as is reported.

Like pp I'm sceptical about how poisonous they are. Tulips are supposed to be toxic, I've had cats that used to eat them, they all lived long lives.

My neighbours do not even know my name let alone have my phone number.