There is nothing positive to achieve from being vile towards retail staff. Why act this way?

[uihd]

Yesterday evening I bought a few items from a supermarket on the way home from work. There were some customers being very rude and disrespectful towards the staff. It has got worse in the past 5 years.

Why do people think it’s ok to act like this? What do they want to achieve with this attitude? Do they realise that people are leaving retail and avoiding looking for work in the retail sector due to their behaviour?

Nothing positive can be achieved from acting like this. If people get a kick out of this, they are just pathetic people.

The staff in supermarkets have no control over
. Prices
. Stock availability
. Products that have been discontinued. Both in store stop selling it and brand stops making it
. Staffing issues
. The number of self checkouts installed
. The law
. Company policies
. Lottery rules

I have done my share in working in retail. Never I want to do that again

What people need to realise is the staffing levels are ridiculous now where literally doing the job of 3 people. Which yes isn't the customers fault but equally isn't the fault of the shop assistant

Technology people don't have patience anymore they expect everything to be instant

Yes I hear you op.
Obviously Brenda on checkout is entirely responsible for the removal of 6 manned tills and the instillation of more self service tills.
She is also responsible for the price of 20 Benson & Hedges fags plus it’s her call that Heinz have stopped making the customer’s favourite variety of soup.
It’s entirely her fault that there is a huge queue despite the fact that she has worked through her break and is working overtime today.

People are more rude full stop and they take it out on the person they get to speak to.

I’ve seen people shout at A+E receptionists (because they’re angry there’s a long wait to be seen), shout at teachers (because they’re angry there’s aren’t providing a bespoke education for their child or that they’re angry be sure they can’t speak to an EP/paediatrician/
dyslexia assessor and the teacher is the one standing in front of them), waitresses for there being an issue with the food (that they didn’t cook), bar staff/doormen who won’t serve them, doctors receptionists (because there’s no appointments) etc etc

I don’t think it’s particularly just retail staff.

I have noticed a huge difference in attitude to punctuality too.
The older generation tend to arrive early for appointments and dress smartly.
The younger generation arrive late, then get pissy when you tell them they will now have to wait as the next appointment has been taken in. Some of them arrive looking like something the cat had puked up too. Lord knows how they deem it appropriate, it’s mind boggling.

The answer is simple, but not very comforting: there are a hell of a lot of nasty, ignorant, rude, unimaginative people out there.

Stupid and unimaginative: don't understand how (retail) and the world in general works. They don't understand complex situations and don't direct their complaints to the relevant person, but just attack the nearest member of staff.

Rude: they have no manners and instead of keeping calm and detached and stating their problem reasonably, they make it a personal attack and become aggressive and abusive.

Nasty: some people are so horrible that they get their kicks from attacking others. They know the retail assistant has to act professionally (a bit like teachers...who can't retaliate when abused ) and they exploit this.

Too many people, jammed into too little space.

Yes. Many people nowadays also give very little (or no) consideration to others and only care about what they want and what’s easiest for them. Lots of selfish, entitled people that would happily tread on others to get something quicker.

My DD works in a shop that retails clothing for women and older girls. The abuse she faces sometimes is awful. She often manages the changing rooms. She has to challenge men who think it's ok to go in there, even into cubicles, when women and girls are changing nearby. DD is petite but she's had 6ft men get up close to her and shout in her face because they've been politely asked to leave the changing room. It's disgusting as they wouldn't like the same happening to their own wife/gf/daughter. Don't get me started on the people who piss in the changing rooms, which is another issue altogether.

I agree, it's not just retail either. Lots of other professions get the same abuse. People are vile these days.

But non of that is the staff members fault.
Complain to management about self checkouts, complete the questionnaire they put on the receipt.
Write to the shop manager, but don’t for one minute think that taking it out on the lowest paid members of staff makes one bit of difference.
Do you think staff enjoy listening to other people’s screaming kids?
Or want hordes of people blocking exits?
They are simply there to earn a living.
If they won the lottery they would probably quit the job on the spot.
I’m not excusing bad service. But don’t mistake what a staff member can and can’t do.
Ds worked at a supermarket for a few years. Whilst on the self service checkouts he also had to do put backs. Run and price check for other cashiers and ensure that baskets were put away.
Plus attend to all the problems the self service tills were causing.
Management were not interested in his opinion. They were there to increase profits, that was all.
He said it was a nightmare.

Ill mannered, over entitled people will be rude to anyone if they can’t get their own way. 🙄

It’s disgusting. Especially pathetic are the chavvy little shits who abuse staff in McDonald’s cos their order’s taking more than 20 seconds or they got the wrong colour M&Ms on their McFlurry. They do it cos it’s the only time they ever get to be in a position where they’re mildly important for 5 minutes and there’s an expectation that they should be treated respectfully cos they’re the customer. It’s them trying to feel important by exerting the very limited power they have in life. It’s pathetic

Just as an example of how I try to do things:

Once in my local M & S I was nearly knocked down and then rudely abused ('Get out of the way, you stupid woman!') by a young male staff member blundering past me. I immediately asked a cashier to call a manager. When she arrived I smiled and calmly explained what had happened.

She asked me to identify the 'culprit', and when I pointed him out we both sort of looked at each other. She was clearly wondering how to explain the situation and at the same moment, I realised that this man was ND and must usually work😁 in a non-customer-facing role - he'd come into the shop from the store and his behaviour obviously wasn't acceptable.

Without further words, we both knew what the answer was: she'd speak to him and I guess, ensure that he didn't get involved in customer-facing situations. I knew she knew and had taken the issue on board...so we parted with a smile.

There's just no need to be horrible to anyone. I hope retail staff who have to deal with horrible customers take it out on them in some way!!!

Oh no - sorry! That smiley face was meant to go at the end of my post. It looks facetious where it is. Aaarrggh. Too early in the morning.

The shop managers don't often have much control over this stuff either And often they aren't even paid that much more than the floor staff. It's the ones in the company who maybe actually visit the store once every few months so just don't care as long as it's making money

The companies are forced to pay higher minimum wage so they just employ less staff to save on wages bill. Consequently the staff have much more work to do

Less staff = frustrated angry customers being rude= leads to staff leaving the job

Oh yes let’s not forget those customers who somehow think they don’t have to pay for their shopping. The ones who wait until the cashier tells them the amount owed and they suddenly declare that they will have to transfer money into the account they want to use to pay for their shopping 😏
WTF is wrong with these people?

I take it you haven't worked in retail?

I find your post quite patronising. If retail staff were 'better trained' in customer service skills, then there'd be less abuse and rudeness from customers? Are you kidding me?

I've worked in retail (still do unfortunately, but I'm hoping to change jobs) and I work with a great team of people who are always pleasant and. polite to customers, as am I. But, we still get quite a lot of abuse, more so in the last few years.
Most people are nice, but the odd few customers are hellish, no matter how polite and helpful you are to them. That's a fact, so please don't assume that retail staff are at fault for receiving abuse if they've not been 'trained' in customer service skills.

I work for a well known company, and for what it's worth, we DO receive training on all sorts of things, including how to try to diffuse a difficult situation, and I imagine most other companies provide training too. However, when dealing with some customers, nothing will stop them being abusive if they want to be.

The other week for example, I heard a young boy who I know is only about 14 tell his mum in the queue that he wanted a certain kind of vape. His mum then approached me at the till and asked me for the vape he'd described. I said that I was sorry but I wasn't able to serve her with it as I knew it was for her son and he was underage.

The mum never even tried to hide the fact she was buying it for him, and said to me 'so what, I'm his mum and if I want to buy it for him I will'
I explained politely that it was against the law even for her to buy an age restricted product for someone under the age of 18, and because I wouldn't bow down to her demand, she called me a 'fucking cunt' , and so did her underage son, then she grabbed the other items she had on the counter (which she hadn't paid for), said she 'wasn't paying for them' and walked out the shop.
So she wasn't only abusive, but stole items too.

So please tell me, where did I go wrong that I deserved this abuse?
Should I have just given her what she asked for and lost my job for knowingly selling an age restricted item to a minor?

This is just ONE example of abuse we get. No amount of training in customer service skills will stop people being abusive. They are abusive because they believe they can get away with it, nothing more.
I imagine you may reply with something like, 'obviously retail staff will always get some arsehole who is extremely vile, but they wouldn't get as much abuse from the general public if they themselves had good communication skills with the customers'

This is where I believe you'd be wrong, I believe that nearly all customers who are abusive and treat retail workers like shit, do so even when they've been treated properly.

It’s not right at all that staff are abused. They are only doing their job.

Shopping in a supermarket nowadays is a pretty rubbish experience. Hardly any staff about and self service tills are awful. I hate going as I know it will be awful.

Both things can be true. I appreciate it comes from the top.

Yes, I did work in retail when I was younger, so I do know what it's like. And I noticed even back then that a lot of my colleagues just didn't seem to know how to talk to people. I see it in shops all the time now, too. Customer service staff handling situations badly and then getting abused by the customer. It isn't desirable for the staff or the customer.

Customer service in this country is sometimes excellent but it is often very poor. Because employers leave it to chance instead of training staff properly.

I have managed numerous frontline functions over the course of my career, and effective training absolutely does make a huge difference to people's experience of the working environment. It doesn't eliminate abuse or rudeness from the public but it does absolutely reduce the frequency of such events if it is done well.

Nobody deserves to be on the receiving end of abuse at work, so employers need to do more to protect and support their staff. And that does involve better or more effective training.

DH and I both worked hospitality for years (that’s how we met, in a Wetherspoons - very romantic I know). People have always been like that. They’re especially rude to young women, I cannot count the amount of 18 year old girls who would run into the kitchen or office crying because some waster had yelled at them over something that’s out of their control. I used to take great pleasure in kicking them out and loudly saying the girl they made cry was 18. People were also super rude to DH but it’s a different kind of rude. It was more blokes who wanted a fight… always the ones who would definitely lose if he took them up on it as well. I think with that it’s because they know he can’t actually scarp them.

I think people do it to feel powerful because they know staff can’t react. As soon as I became a manager though I did start being rude back, and we had a general rule in our pub that was you can’t use profanity but if they start on you you are allowed to start on them back. A lot of places don’t allow that though and subscribe to “the customer is always right”. I hate that phrase with a passion. I prefer “the customer is always right but you are guests and guests can be asked to leave.”

I'm very much in the camp of treat people how you want to be treated.

but have noticed a decline in the standards of customer service. Staff carrying on a conversation with each other while serving, making the customer feel like an inconvenience happens all too often these days as an example. Equally standing at self service waiting for a staff member, who are too busy discussing their weekend to notice or help. Again something that happens way more often than it should. That in no way excuses rude customers, but it shows a general decline in standards.

i hate, as a customer, to feel like my presence is an inconvenience.

I work retail (think golden arches) and the abuse I've taken is unreal

I will do my best to help but im sick of taking abuse when it's not my fault

People will scream at me 'I've been waiting 20 minutes!' (It's always 20 minutes) and when I check,its been 3 minutes

I had a bloke come in and scream at me because he'd ordered his breakfast with a diet coke

He got his breakfast with a diet coke but it was all my fault as he wanted an orange juice and instead of asking me nicely to change it,he punched me in the face

Another was during that eat out to help out

We where heaving and it was either wait for a table or takeout-i had zero control over tables

A woman walked in and started screaming that I had to move a family off 'her' table so she could have it

She grabbed my ponytail and yanked when I refused

A bloke shoved his hand up my top when I said good morning to him

Im done to be honest,im good at my job and if you came in and be polite,ill move mountains for you but abuse me and fuck you

I agree that a lot of customers can be rude and most staff in supermarkets do a good job and are professional. However, if people’s levels of entitlement have gone up and manners and respect for others gone down, then that must include the (often young) retail staff too. They are people too after all. I have seen a lot of inappropriate behaviour by staff in supermarkets lately. The other day I walked past two women employees in Sainsburys with my 4-year-old, only to clearly hear, “his knob was fucking massive”!! There was no attempt to whisper, they could clearly see me and my child. If I hadn’t been with my dc I probably would’ve laughed it off but it made me angry that she had to overhear that. I often see staff standing around chatting when people are at a malfunctioning self-service checkout and need help and staff are completely oblivious. I’ve seen young male staff in the aisles messing about trying to carry loafs of bread on their heads, dropping them, then putting them back on the shelves. Been blocked in the aisle by multiple members of staff standing around chatting, and, as I mentioned earlier, no attempt ever seems to be made to ensure the conversation is appropriate to be overheard by customers

But there's a big difference between complaining - which surely can be done politely and calmly - and being rude to shop floor staff who are not personally responsible for any of the things you've described in your post and may feel just as wound up as you by them.

Though I left retail 2 years ago. I feel sorry for my former colleagues who are unable to leave work due to:
. Their age - many are late 50s-mid 60s. Employers don’t to employ them.
. Not computer illiterate. Over the years, computer (including handsets) use has increased in retail. I was the one who helped them signing into their online training and when the shifts, holiday booking went onto an app. They can just the basics to get by.
. Hours that suit commitments. A few of them need to finish work 2pm on certain days, so able to pick up their DC or DGC from school. Starting somewhere else may not get these shifts