What is the point of life?

[DrowningQuietly]

My 13 yo DD asked over lunch what the point of life is when everyone dies. It rather stumped me... what would you have said? Was I unreasonable for saying not very much?

Jump on the HMRC website, that's basically it.

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You dont know the point of your own life? Start there

I think it's about helping others who are less fortunate, if you can. Just my guess.

There is no point. Just be a good person, help others and enjoy it as best as you can.

My DS went through a phase of asking that when he was 10/11. I explained the point is what you do with your life, the people we love, the things we’re passionate about, the difference we make in our lives and in the lives of others. We talked about people he loved who had died and how much poorer our lives would have been without them - their love lives on in people who loved them.

Mortality is a hard thing to get your head around.

She's expressing a fear of death to you. In all seriousness, I remember becoming aware of death at that age and it was awful. I spent weeks not being able to sleep, and it coincided with my parents separating which really didn't help.

Who knows what the point of it all is or what the meaning of life is.

There can be many or no satisfactory answers.

What matters is knowing the meaning in (not of) your own life: What gives us meaning? Once you focus on that, it makes more sense and gives us something to work with.

I'd praise her for asking such a deep and important question. I'd let her know that it's a question that philosophers, writers, artists, spiritual seekers, and psychologists have been pouring over for time immemorial. That there's no single answer, but there are many different ideas, and it's for each person to decide for themselves. I would point her in the direction of some philosophy 101/ philosophy for kids books, including both eastern and western traditions. Ask her what she thinks and let her talk it out.

There is no point. There doesn’t have to be a point.

This!

To try and do whatever you can to be happy .

The one thing you should not say is that the point of life is to have kids! She deserves to be able to make up her own mind on that one.

That’s the answer to life, the universe and everything.

Personally, I don’t think there is any conscious point to life. We are all just organisms trying to pass on our genes. The fact that we as a species have developed consciousness is a byproduct of evolution.

At 13 this could either be a serious question or a provocation. You'll know best which it is.

Assuming she is sincere, I'd start by asking her what she thinks it is. Her answer may give you some idea of where to go next.

I'd explain that unless you are religious, and think of life as a sort of audition for heaven, there isn't really a 'point' as such, or a reason to live your life one way or the other. And I'd say that the fact we all die in the end either means nothing matters, or that everything matters enormously, and that either of those perspectives can be a blessing or a curse.

A more straightforward thing to say might be to think of herself not as one individual life, but part of a collective. The human species has been going for a good while now, and what certain people have done in their finite time has moved the needle in terms of where we are now - for better or worse. So maybe the point is to contribute in some meaningful and hopefully positive way to that ongoing project.

Or you can be a sentimentalist like me and say the point of life is to experience emotion - love, pleasure, awe, terror, grief and pain - and to NOTICE it all, to notice being human, because it's all we have and all there is.

I told my dc that it was a good question, one that people have been asking for centuries, and that different people have different opinions about it.

And then I would outline a religious viewpoint ie to overcome obstacles and do good for others.

A more anthropological one ie we’re here to procreate and ensure the survival of our species (but again for what collective purpose)?

And a more philosophical one ie we are here on earth to create our own meaning and what a fantastic opportunity it is!

That’s all a bit simplistic but if a thirteen year old is asking, you can ask them what they think and try and find out what lies beneath the question, as I agree that this can be the age when fear of mortality strikes.

There's no point. Just enjoy the ride.

I remember asking my dad this and he said “have fun and if you’re not a total fucking waster procreate” and then he narrowed his eyes and said “don’t you be procreating till you’re at least 18”. Pretty good summary imo.

There is no point. Once you're here, the you might as well make the most of it (enjoy the ride as a pp said), contribute positively, leave a legacy, etc but there is no point.

Propagation of the species, trying to do the least amount of environmental damage as we do so

I think Bill Hicks nailed it.

However, whether that's an age appropriate place to start is debatable for a 13 year old.

But yeah, as PPs have suggested, it's just a ride....

I don’t think there has to be a point to life. We are born, we exist, we die.

No point in the long run. The sun will engulf the planet in the long run and all will be gone. But in the meantime you might as well lead a nice life and try to help others to do the same.

The continuation of the species.

Other than that, what you do with it is up to you.

It’s worth discussing what she means by “the point of life” and why she thinks there has to be a point. Does she think that other animals think about this? What’s the point of a blade of grass?

Well the point of life is to procreate to ensure the overall, continued survival of the species. That's "The Point."

Then once you've done that (the most important job as per Mother Nature's contract) you can start to think about other things - you might experience some kind of existential crisis in your personal search for meaning. But don't worry because there is no point to you beyond your ability to procreate - so you can make the rest up as you go along in accordance with your personal value system.