What is the point of life?

[DrowningQuietly]

My 13 yo DD asked over lunch what the point of life is when everyone dies. It rather stumped me... what would you have said? Was I unreasonable for saying not very much?

The 'point' of life is to enjoy the passage of time.

Ultimately there isn't one, but we're all here whether we like it or not, so the only option really is to make the best of it, get out into nature, have fun, enjoy it

😂😂

but also, you are correct

😭

You could say "what's the point of a holiday, you have to come home eventually". Answer, it's the experience of it. That's all life is. Experiences. To me it's no deeper than that. There is no great "purpose". Just try to enjoy it as much as you can, preferably without doing harm to others! That's it.

To give birth to the next lot.

I explain it as how the one freedom we get is to decide what the purpose and point of our own life is. We do it by finding out what our principles are (how we judge what is fair and right) and also what gives us joy and spark. We might find meaning in hiking or rescuing animals or beautiful clothes or surfing. We might find it in being a good neighbour and a good friend.

You could introduce her to ikigai which is all about purpose, or get her reading some interesting philosophy (Sophie's World is a great novel to introduce young adults to the whole of philosophy!)

Definitely do not tell that to children. I was told everyone’s purpose in life was to have children. It’s all we’re here for. It gives your life meaning. I heard this message all throughout my childhood and youth. Turns out I couldn’t have children. Several miscarriages was all that happened over a lot of years from 27-43. Despite all the good meaning people telling me otherwise now, I cannot shift the mindset that my entire life is pointless and a waste of time. I feel like I’m just waiting to die now as I cannot do the only reason I was put here. You can’t spend years telling someone the only way their life will have meaning is to have children, then try and backtrack if it turns out they can’t. It’s already ingrained.

Biologically - to reproduce so that our genes can be passed on. Nothing else in the harsh scheme of things.

But I wouldn't just say that to a young teenager! Our lives have no intrinsic meaning but if we're wise we give them meaning through our choices and our actions, so that might mean

• being a positive force in other people's lives
• having fun and doing what makes us happy - nurturing and enjoying our relationships
• being creative in some way and expressing our thoughts and feelings through art, writing, music etc etc

There isn't one, obviously. You might say perpetuating the species, but not everyone chooses to do so.
But you can deflect the question a bit, and talk about your child discovering her own purpose, whether that be career, people, hobbies etc.

I believe that either side is dark nothingness (and sometimes I spiral if I think about being dead forever and ever and ever because it's very hard to imagine) so I think it's simply an opportunity to experience existing.

Well I have failed at my sole purpose so guess I can just faff about for the rest of it now!

Not everyone chooses to do so, but species flourish with the assistance of non reproducing members. Most lionesses in a pride dominated reproduce but they all assist in care. Small birds huddle together for warmth in winter and those that haven’t reproduced but have assisted in rearing get a warmer spot nearer the middle.

So yes, reproduction is the point for all species. What an individual human does is up to them.

There isn't a point in general, but it would be more worrying if she was asking what's the point of her life that she is living.

Once we are here, I would say to make a positive difference, experience emotions, to love and be loved, and to be kind.

People vary on how much they need to have a point to life, as this thread shows.

I used to think the point of my life was to find a lovely man and make a nice life with him. When that went wrong (xh left me and the dc), I basically had an existential crisis alongside the practical/romantic disaster of it.

So my only advice is to not pin too much of your life's purpose to one individual person (even your dc as you can't guarantee closeness when they're adults)

I would throw the question back by asking why does there have to be a point?

Fundamentally it is to continue as a species.
But the point of living life well comes into play. And that is where you get your values, choosing decency, being agreeable and having a generous spirit counts for a lot.

Apparently only love endures.
Everything else is rubbish finally.

If that's true, the question then is:
What is love?

I don't think there's a point. It's a massive gift.

When my dd was little I thought it was perhaps to evolve to the point where we can understand the universe. Then maybe we’ll understand the actual meaning (like a sort of “level 2”)

Sometimes I think the point is to take care of the planet and the other life forms who live here - which we’re not doing very well at!

I mean there may be no point in the strict sense of the word.

I like Billy Connolly's view of it:
"Everybody's born to do a certain thing
And if you're dead jammy you find it
And if you're good at it just keep doing it
Until you're fed up then do something else
You're here to make babies and look after the place
You know?"

I have no idea what the point is, assuming there is one definite answer to that. However this morning when my seven year old sat next to me and tucked in for a cuddle, that moment felt like the whole point. I could have sat and enjoyed it forever and don't see the need for there to be any other point to life than that.

I would take it down a level.

A beautiful flower growing in the garden will die at the end of the season, what is the point of the flower?

We might value the flower for its beauty or scent. The birds and bees will value it for sustenance, other plants growing near it might value it for protection or shade.

The point or the flower is not beauty, scent, sustence, protection or shade. The point of the flower is just to be.

As humans we have more agency than the flower and we might just “be” or we might strive to be the best human we can be.

Our purpose doesnt negate our value though.

Lots of people say the point is to procreate. Not really true though. Just because we and other species have a strong urge to do it doesn’t imbue it with any meaning or moral direction.

Whether you enjoy life or not is only of any importance to you.
In a hundred years time there will be nobody who remembers you.

My take is the point of life is basically the same as Minecraft, ie it could be:

• a survival game,
• an art tool,
• a logistics simulator,
• a social world,
• an architecture sandbox,
• a programming platform,
• or a relaxation ritual.

“What is the point?” The point is basically self-generated.