What is the point of life?

[DrowningQuietly]

My 13 yo DD asked over lunch what the point of life is when everyone dies. It rather stumped me... what would you have said? Was I unreasonable for saying not very much?

I’m teaching this to year 8 as part of a philosophy unit. existentialism is that you exist to fulfil what ever purpose you want to. You make your own purpose. Have a look at some of the ted ed videos including the unanswerable questions.

its strange that you have never though about though.

one of the year 8 said 42 but the point was lost on most of them.

There isn’t one really. You’re just here and have to decide for yourself what’s a good use of your time.

The answer is a matter of perspective and whether you’re looking for a deeper, more philosophical response. It also rests on your beliefs.

i feel very clear about the purpose of my life (and no one else’s), which is to learn and grow by embracing the lessons I’m presented with so my soul can fulfil its expansive journey. Leaving this planet fulfilled and content that I saw life for what it was - not material, not fear but love beyond human comprehension.

True. And even though very famous people will remain remembered, that’s of zero relevance to the remembered once they’re dead. A bit like how loads of people from our past might “think of us” sometimes, but because we never realise when we’re being thought of (ie unless they tell us etc) it essentially means’s nothing. So that only more extreme.

When you consider the universe we are just blobs of cells spinning around on a small rock.

Enjoy the time you are here. Add to other people's happiness, not subtract from it. Do your best to leave humanity and the planet in a better state than you found it.

This panics me sometimes. I once stayed up late reading Remains of the Day and went into a huge spiral about whether I was living a fulfilling life, or if I was on the wrong track. Since then my track has changed direction significantly but I still don't feel it's the right one. And time is passing quickly, I'm 50 now (somehow).

Maybe we need a support group!

My autistic brain has pondered this extensively and will simply not accept reality is what we perceive.
There is some logic and sense to all of this, we are just unable to comprehend it.
My working analogy is, give a cat a book, it will sit on the book, chew the book, knock it off the table. But it has no concept of what that book is, the information it contains, and could never, even with the right instruction, be taught to read the book. We're the cat, the books are reality, we may well interact with it but we've got no comprehension or perception of it because our brains simply aren't on that level.
So the best thing we can do is bimble around, try and make the best of it, and not waste too much time worrying about it.

Life cannot be sustained without death, it’s the circle of life! Biologically, our aim is to reproduce. Mentally, I guess it depends on the person. My purpose is to be an asset to the planet and the people around me and try to have fun doing it.

To enjoy it. And to make it as enjoyable as possible for the people around you to.

There is no "point" to life. Everything we do will be forgotten. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. If you do something awesome, then maybe not even for 100 or 1000 years. But one day, every single person that ever lived will be forgotten about, even if it takes until the sun goes dark.

So if nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do. I post on Mumsnet because I enjoy it. I'll go for a walk on lunch because I enjoy it. I work because I sometimes enjoy it, but mostly because I enjoy the things I can do with the money I make from work. I enjoy Mars bars, but I don't eat them because I enjoy living more and Mars Bars are incompatible with that for me.

Every decision I make is based on what is going to make me enjoy my life more, whether thats short term enjoyment or long term enjoyment. So for me, that's the point.

1. A sense of wonder. (Get her watching David Attenborough and Brian Cox and Carl Sagan).

2. Kindness. I have never been too interested in politics. What really counts is how you treat the flesh and blood humans you meet every day. As someone once said, “be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” But also kindness to animals. We have reason, which gives us power over other animals, and we use that power mostly for evil (just visit a slaughterhouse). But we could use it for good.

3. Beauty. The world is savagely cruel and very frightening, but it’s also beautiful. And art is beautiful as well.

4. The accumulation of knowledge. At the click of a mouse you can find out SO much about history, science, nature, etc. Look at what we’ve discovered, from DNA to the size distant galaxies. Then there is the literary canon. We have 3,000 years of literature at our fingertips, everything from The Bhagavad Gita and Plato’s dialogues to Oscar Wilde and Virginia Woolf.

This. I have no purpose or point in life. I just live each day seeking put new and small pleasures. I think for that’s healthy as my life looks drastically different to how I thought it would.

So I am living the life unplanned without seeking any great purpose.

Same thing as everything else on the planet - to exist, grow, do, then decline and die in a cycle. Thankfully as humans our brains are developed enough to enjoy the journey.

Tell her she’s right. Life is meaningless and everything dies.

I believe we are here by accident and there's no point. But that's freeing in a way, isn't it? You can't do life "wrong" as there is no "right".

Perhaps she’ll study philosophy at uni. Maybe buy her a Kant book for Christmas.

I like this 👌

To have the most fabulous time as possible in the time you get. Proper belly laugh whenever you can. Feel sad sometimes. I mean, it means whatever you want it to mean really. I don't think our lives our pointless at all, at least not to the people that matter.

I love this

All living things are here to reproduce and carry on life. Why? No idea. It's way beyond my understanding.
It does seem ultimately pointless.

If you can have a healthy, enjoyable life you are very lucky.

Ask her why she is questioning it? Not to stifle her curiosity but to check her mental state. My DC has asked this question for years. I happily put it down to deep thinking but in reality, my DC is prone to low mood and this question comes up time after time when at the lowest.

Id have told her that there isnt a point to it but her existence means she is already a negative strain on the plants resources so, unlike the other animals on the planet which are just existing because they've been born, its really up to her if she wants to have a purpose in life that makes her a net contributor to making the world a better place to live for others.

I asked my dad this at a similar age. He said "There is no point. It didn't happen on purpose for a reason, its just sonething that happened. But since it's happened, you might as well try to enjoy it and do your best to help other people to".

Thank you for all your replies, there is a lot to unpack and think about. I think she might be borderline depressed. It has been a difficult couple of years for our family with separation and my own ill health and questions like this worry me that everything has had an impact. I appreciate all of your responses.

Ultimately there is no point, except that which we give to it. It's up to you to try to make your life meaningful, fulfilling etc. I choose to also try to help others improve their lives, in an attempt to replicate what others have done for me.
But at some point, the earth will have erased all trace of human existence. And at a later point, the earth itself will cease to exist.
So give it whatever meaning you can, and make it a good one 🙂

Tell her the point is to find out what the point is. And along the way have some fun and contribute to other’s fun.

And then if see if anything was troubling her. We’re all celebrating the fact that she’s a bright girl, pondering on the meaning of life but is she depressed? Is she trying to tell you something? Has something happened to her? What’s caused her to ask this question now?

Sometimes we focus so much on the answer to someone’s question when we should be focussing on why the question is being asked.