To really dread weekends?

[frillonit]

Is this normal lol

two little kids (2 and 5) never know what to do with them or how to fill the time. Everywhere is busy and expensive. But if you stay home it’s awful.

I grew up in a time when we weren't entertained and sent out to the garden to play, but we did have a lot of play dates on a saturday afternoon with other school friends as well as children parties

my own children I got up early and got them out of the house early and wore them out as much as I could - but with a 2 year old the danger nap is a problem

Try other foods - if they’ve been outside long enough they’ll be hungry.
Even now my children are adult I usually make sausage rolls for picnics. Bought pre rolled puff pastry. Sausage meat. (You can add things like chopped onion/herbs etc but for children I’d stick with plain). Spread along the pastry and fold over. Get the children involved squishing the sausage meat into shape. Painting the pastry with egg. Cut into small bite pieces and bake. It’s so simple and most meat eating children will enjoy.
Flapjacks. A lot of fat and sugar so not entirely healthy but most children will enjoy and can help with the mixing.
If they like dry fruit try Bara Brith fruit bread. Mary Berry is the most simple recipe ever. I made one to take on holiday this last week as well as some banana bread (it was that or throw away three black bananas as I was packing). Stopped at supermarket along the way and the woman parked next to us spotted the cake box and declared both her favourite cakes!
All quick and easy to make.

Kids need to learn to deal with boredom.

But there is loads you could do. For example, make homemade crispy cakes with the kids and pack them as a simple picnic with squash. Give them a treasure hunt in the park - 5 year old does their own and you and 2 year old do it together. Just a simple list with pictures such as "a blue flower" "an oak leaf" "a feather".

You can do the same in the supermarket - put 2 year old in the trolley and give 5 year old a simple shopping list with items from all round the store. Eg bread, apples, tin of soup, pasta shapes.

Yep, mine are 5 and 7.

Both me and DH work full time (although his hours are much more flexible than mine as he is self-employed) so we somehow have to fit in all the stuff we didn’t have time to do in the week, plus exercise, plus exercising the kids, and entertaining one autistic&adhd&pda child who is used to having a 1-2-1 all week at school and finds any amount of boredom incredibly dysregulatin and needs to be completely in control of all situations, and one highly anxious child who has missed her mummy all week and wants to be joint to my hip.

I feel like I spend all weekend as a hostage negotiator with the occasional glimmer of enjoyment.

When my 2 DC were that age I kinda treated them like intelligent, active dogs. Feed them, burn off brain energy and burn off body energy. Outside always in any weather. Flying kites. Walking. Geocaching was huge! Free and like finding pirate treasure. Parks always. Car picnics. Going to beach. Library. Museums.

It’s just me which obviously makes it harder in some ways.

Oh it isn’t exactly things to do @Atleastthedoglikesme . You can always do something, it’s just tedious for me and no break.

Hi op. Mine are much older and about to go to uni.

But FB often shows me photos of how we spent our days! I was a sahm.

Park with friends. Daily in the week. Church playgroup mornings, lunch at home then swap houses each afternoon.

Weekends as a family. Usually DH would be doing something DIY and we would lego, brio, play kitchen, paint, playdoh, pizza for tea. I can count on one hand the times we went to soft play as imo it's the seventh circle of hell.

But I loved being in the house. Loved the rhythm of activity - clear up - lunch - sleep (me!) - activity - clear up - tea - bath - bed.

We also walked at the weekend and as we lived in Ireland, often Sunday was somewhere with an avoca cafe attached.

I know its not easy at this age but the effort you put in now will pay off in the long run. Get them out to do something outside in the morning (park, walk, feed the ducks, scooters). Having kids that love being outdoors saves alot of money in the long run. Pack a simple picnic (im talking sandwiches/crisps), take snacks, if money allows get a coffee/cake/ice cream whilst out. I always did as many lunches outside at the weekend at that age as its one less meal to clean up after inside.

Home to play/watch a movie in the afternoon. At that age, I stuck mine in the bath early as they were always more settled after a bath and in pjs (it doesn’t matter what time it is) and I could get on with things and have a cuppa in peace.

Trust me, having older kids that love being outdoors and don’t whinge on walks etc is worth the many, many days spent freezing in the park in all weathers 😁

Yes I do thanks … they have swimming and we’ll do something. Last week fed the ducks, had a walk, then played in the garden and they had a birthday party which helped break things up. Nothing on this weekend, I’ll do something. Just … not a break.

Any local car boot sales? Always good for a wander around and cheap books or a toy.

It is so full on at that age but does get easier every year. Enjoy all the free stuff as much as possible whilst they are young (park, feeding ducks etc).

Once mine had been out, they were always more settled and would sit playing/watch cbeebies etc and you can have some time.

Not a huge fan of playdates at home although we endured them 😁Meeting up with friends in the park was always so much easier and could actually chat to a friend whilst they played. Even if you’re pushing them on a swing chatting to a friend, it’s still abit of adult conversation. Reach out to friends if you can as you realise others might be stuck for plans too.

What would you do on a weekend pre kids OP? Is there anyway you could adapt that to be suitable for kids?

Growing up my parents were avid surfers so we spent most of our time on the beach! I understand that isn’t an option for you in Derbyshire though. I’d say getting outside however you can and as much as possible always helps! They’re tired when they come in then and happy to lounge about for a few hours. We’re also lucky we live on a nice safe estate full of families so they’re out riding bikes round the street and playing with neighbours kids. Is that possible for you?

Ugh honestly not much … I find the week quite hectic and full on so in an ideal world would probably slob around, sleep late, read, veg. That life has gone and i know it will come back eventually (I hope anyway) but feels light years away at the moment!

I get it. I’m also a lone parent of 2 (aged almost 6 and 19 months). At the moment it’s ok, we do a lot of pottering at home basically them creating mess and me tidying/cleaning it! But it’s better than being out all day pointlessly walking/random park, that’s just not me.

my worse point was when oldest was 2/3, I remember dreading Fridays and esp bank holiday weekends. I remember Xmas at this age and hating that I couldn’t enjoy chilling after Xmas eating leftovers and catching up on tv etc. but then I remember at some point I suddenly realised I looked forward to weekends and dreaded Mondays again and realised my kid had become easier/fun, and then I had another one 😂

I can sense that my second child is more active and may need all the walks/parks in all weathers thing at 2/3 and I’m dreading it 😫

OK OP - it's normal (depending on the person you are) to find the 'little kid' stuff excrutiatingly boring at times, moreso if that is what each and every weekend (specifically) consists of in what seems a never ending loop with no horizon.

However, do cherish the 'good times'; those silly times when you couldn't let go because of the 'other stuff'. Because those are the rare and lovely times that you will hold and make sure you do.

Because in a flash they're gone.

@AnyankaJenkins i hear you. With no1 I was out a lot but it’s just really stressful and expensive as even free places aren’t with parking / ice creams / uneaten picnics.

Not totally sure I agree ‘
@TheHateIsNotGood I am convinced entire empires have been lost and won since I was pregnant with dc1!

Meant to post - "those silly times when previously you couldn't let go because of the 'other stuff'. But now you can."

If it’s any comfort it is an age/stage and as pp have said it gets better.

A rainy December Saturday afternoon I was out picking holly and met a father coming the other way. Three dogs. Two children, probably about 5 & 3.
The three year old was whining “Mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, I WANT MY MUMMY” non stop.
The poor Dad, he did try bless him “Mummy’s at work. You’ll see her soon” which just resulted in an even louder “I WANT MY MUMMY”.

We all just have to get through it! There are ways to make it easier and more enjoyable but sometimes it’s just what it is. At least outside they are not making mess and they will be tired when they come in.

Summer is coming. Plan to spend as much time outside as possible. It’ll be fun and build happy memories and resilience for better times to come.

Twenty years on and the tables are turned with DD1 planning forced marches around the Scottish highlands and me weakly pointing out I’m not as young and fit as I was and I have a dodgy knee.

The circle of life. ❤️

Also regarding tidying up I really regret that my parenting style was get them out of the way (in bed) and clear up after. I simply failed to teach my children to do chores. DD1 is naturally organised and tidy. DD2 not so much…

There is a child psychologist on X (I think he’s on instagram as well) who posts about the value of teaching children chores - Dan Wuori. And of course that’s another way to entertain them.

I’ve also noticed a Japanese mother I watch on YouTube - when they all come home from work/nursery etc she includes her small child in helping prepare supper. Again I was all about feed them and get them to bed. But then there would be another round of cooking/eating/washing up for the adults. And the children haven’t learnt to participate in the hard work of family living.

We have to find the way that suits us but if I was doing it again I’d do differently.

https://x.com/danwuori/status/2035727622403936732?s=46

Are you always this negative?

Yep, same here!
I swear my children think I'm sooo boring ☹️

Another great Dan Wuori post about the value of limiting the number of toys your children have (which also has the added advantage of reducing mess!).

https://x.com/danwuori/status/1999849632973672516?s=46

Tbh my DH and I just do what we want and DD tags along. She is 18m and happy to join in on our stuff. Long walks, brunches, mooching around farmer's markets, visiting NT properties etc. We do fit in other things like playgrounds and the like but it's our weekend too!

Mine are 6 and 3, so the same age gap as you OP but we're one year on.
When they were 4 and 1, I made a spreadsheet of all the really good parks within about an hours drive. I found that there were several that included lots of different bits e.g. a bike track (does your 2yo have a balance bike/scooter?), a decent playground with sandpit (essential - mine will spend a good 40 mins in the sand!), a wooded area for playing with sticks, a cafe, toilets, some water for paddling/feeding the ducks, etc.
So a typical Saturday for us looks like 40-60 minutes of TV for the kids in the morning while I have a coffee and pack a bag for the day (include snacks and some robust monster trucks or a remote control car or something). We potter around the house for a while, look at books, they play together and sometimes I join in / intervene in a squabble, then around 9 we set off, get to the park around 9.30 or 10. Because the parks have so many different areas, we can usually kill several hours there. Yeah, its not wildly exciting for me, but it's pleasant enough, and there are periods where they run off and entertain themselves and I can relax or zone out. If your little one doesn't like picnics, just do lots of snacks and make some of them nutritious. Around 3 we'll head home, getting back by 3.30 or 4. I might set up a craft activity or get out the magnitiles or something they can do with minimal input from me - DS usually has an idea and DD goes along with it for a while. Sometimes we do some baking. And soon enough it's time for dinner, bath, bed!
It is hard, and sometimes I'm bored or frustrated about various aspects of the day, but I definitely wouldn't say I dread the weekends.

Are they in nursery/preschool during the week?