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AIBU?

In hating parents

53 replies

CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:32

Who think they are better parents than everybodt else, simply by being 'fussier' and overly involved in their childrens' lives. There's a mum I've known for a while now who epitomises the 'helicopter mother' thing. She's always in school complaining about something or other, never takes her bloody eyes off her kids, even for one second and smirks when other children do anything wrong. God I hate her.

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fryalot · 21/06/2008 20:33

do you really hate her? or do you find her irritating? I think that hate is a bit of a strong word for someone who hasn't actually harmed you in any way.

(maybe I'm just feeling too nice today though )

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meemar · 21/06/2008 20:34

hate is a bit strong!

Why does it bother you so much? Just ignore her.

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Cammelia · 21/06/2008 20:34

Ignore that mother cc

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LaDiDaDi · 21/06/2008 20:34

Not unreasonable at all, relaxed is the way to go imo.

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Nagapie · 21/06/2008 20:36

Wait 'til those darlings hit puberty !!

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beansmum · 21/06/2008 20:36

Why do you hate her? I wouldn't give her a second thought.

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CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:38

I know it's a really strong word but I think that I do hate her. There have been constant slights against me, my ds1, she's even critisised my house and the type of party I threw for ds1. I've kind of reached the end of my tether and expressing my frustration in this way is cathartic.

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cornsilk · 21/06/2008 20:39

That could be me in that I have to go in school about one of my ds's a fair bit, I don't take my eyes off him too much as I'm genuinely worried about what he's getting up to. I don't think I smirk when other kids do something wrong, but maybe I do without realising it.

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meemar · 21/06/2008 20:40

Ok - if she's personally insulted you then you have reason to dislike her.

Vent away

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cornsilk · 21/06/2008 20:40

are your ds's friends?

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OverMyDeadBody · 21/06/2008 20:40

there really is no point in wasting vasluable energy hating anyone, or even thinking abou tithem or letting them get you all annoyed.

All hate will do is damage you, not her.

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fryalot · 21/06/2008 20:41

aaah, in that case, kill the bitch, kill the bitch

(disclaimer: that was not to be taken seriously, and squonk denies any responsibility in any violent death of helicopter mum)

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Cammelia · 21/06/2008 20:42

laugh instead, rise above

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CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:42

Yes they are cornsilk. I'd go into more details but you never know who's reading this. I've tried to keep my distanmce but this week there have been a few events at school and a party. I always walk away thinking, god you get on my tits, why do I bother?

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Desiderata · 21/06/2008 20:42

Oh, hate away, Cissy. She sounds like a drag.

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CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:46

I know I should rise above it, but i've laughed it off and risen above it for so long now that I think I'll end up with an ulcer. I'm the only person who really bothers to talk to her and I'm always nice to her kids. My ds1 is terrified of her. She glares at children she doesn;t like and constantly slags other people's kids off. I sit there saying nothing but thinking to myself that if I heard her saying anything about my son, I'd rip her bloody head off.

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Flashman · 21/06/2008 20:50

Why are mums so competative with each other - gen question there? If she want to "helicopter" let her, how does that affect you. Life is too short to worry about things that have no bearing on your own life.

In my own view.

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Cammelia · 21/06/2008 20:51

I would start closing down your relationship with her. see her as little as possible, avoid her

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CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:52

It effects me because I am the direct target of unpleasant comments. And so is my son and his friends. It is not enough for her children to suceed. She wont be happy unless all their friends fail. In short, she's nuts and I feel like I've had enough.

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Flashman · 21/06/2008 20:53

You make yourself sound so bitter - you hate her for doing the best for her child?? Hmmm I am not sure I would want you as a friend!

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CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:56

You're totally right Cammelia. She and I were never good friends but we did see quite a lot of each other through school etc. I've tried to minimise the times I see her. For example if we are both going to the same place I won't offer/accept a lift. It's hard to completely cut soembody out like that though and the very, very few times I see her she manages to really upset me. I'm made of really tough stuff usually but I think she's worn me down.

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Desiderata · 21/06/2008 20:56

Are you the woman she's talking about, Flash?

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CissyCharlton · 21/06/2008 20:57

Ditto Flashman.

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Flashman · 21/06/2008 20:59

Made of tough stuff - you make yourself sound as tough as marshmellow!!! She has worn you down by making her child her first piority

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OrmIrian · 21/06/2008 20:59

cissycharlton - career mother! Her identity now depends on her DCs. She had to take them seriously or risk being a failure. Next time she winds you up just pity her.

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