Paying to go to a kid’s birthday party..?

[hannneshy]

Some friends of ours havs recently booked a party for their six year old at a zoo. The invite says all accompanying adults need to pay their own entry into the zoo (£15 per adult)
(details slightly changed for anon purposes)
Is this a pisstake, or am I being unreasonable?
if this was me, I’d have absorbed that cost into the cost of the party booking - I would’ve covered it. Surely..?

Exactly. What a stupid party. To sit in a room at the zoo. Much better things to do than that especially if the child is old enough for drop off parties.

This isn’t normal, in my experience. I’m with you, OP. They should have factored into the cost some adults in attendance. My son is 7 now, and I have a DD3. I have never yet been asked to pay out of pocket to attend a party. £15 to go along, plus a present for the birthday child, is a bit CF.

If parents are required to stay, they should cover the cost of it. Or book a venue that doesn’t cost parents to attend.

That's not answering the question though 🙈

Sounds like a shit party. I wouldn’t go.

I had a party for my DD at an animal park. I needed a ratio of one adult for four kids and asked if a couple parents would volunteer to stay. NO WAY would I expect them to pay! I covered it.

My daughter is having a party at a Farm, 12 of her friends are coming, I have to pay for the parents as well. The Farm rules specify that parents need to watch their kids. The parents cost €8 each and added to €14.50 per child does add up. Thank goodness the birthday is annually not biannual 🤣

If they've booked a party with a party it seems odd to be that an adult cannot attend with them free of charge. I think it is cheeky as it's not really a party if you have to pay but I have known people have a day out at a farm or similar and expect people to pay for themselves. I suppose you could just say no if you didnt want to to but I agree it's odd.

Then again, I find it weird when people have parties and expect people to bring their own drinks but plenty of people do that!

How is it not answering the question 😂 Anyway, I obviously have different reading skills!

DD1 is 6, I’m happy to drop and go
DD2 is 4, depending on the party, I would probably stay but wouldn’t be against a drop and go.

it depends on the child, their age and the party. There’s a huge difference between a 4 year old and 6 year old

We’ve had farm parties recently for both of our kids and luckily they included 1 adult per child (2 for the birthday child) but any additional adults had to pay.

It is probably area dependent. I can’t imagine leaving my ds at the zoo to be honest (he is five and a half.) he’d probably try to get in the baboon enclosure 🙄 😂

If you can drop and go then I think it's fine. If they're expecting parents to stay it's very poor form. My children have had parties at similar places and I wouldn't dream of asking anyone to pay to attend a party. You invite, you pay.

We’re in the northwest. I agree! My son is four, i wouldn’t leave him without one of us there

This sums it up well i think. Its a while off yet so time to think about it but dont want our four year old to miss out

Not read all the thread, but my child is having something similar (same age range) and I've said on the invitation that parents are encouraged to drop off. The party package only includes 1 adult ticket per 5 children. There will be a group of responsible adults to oversee the children. Most parents are delighted to be able to drop and go.

Yanbu. My DD’s friend had a high-rope course “party” but because the kids were too young to have no supervision on the course, she asked some parents to join in. She very graciously offered to pay, and we all said we wouldn’t dream of making her pay and it sounded like fun, we’d pay for ourselves.

She ordered Dominos to be delivered to the forest and fed us all at the end to say thank you.

It was a lovely party and it was all so beautifully polite, it gave me a happy glow.

I’d never expect a parent to pay for anything. When I’ve done parties for DS I’ve covered all costs for adults including providing drinks and food for them if needed.

I've been to a few parties for similar ages recently, the party includes an adult per child. Have you gone onto the zoo's website end looked at their party packages to check what's included?

I wouldn't expect second adults or siblings to be included to a cost per head thing but no way would I leave a 4 year old at a party in a busy venue like a zoo with only one or two parents minding a big group, so I'd expect the adult to be included. I'm surprised the zoo would be happy to have large groups with very little oversight!

Have you asked them why you have to pay £15 to sit in a room?

Why are people grilling op? She has said numerous times that kids are between 4-6 and parents are expecting other parents to stay. You can just leave a 5 year old if parents aren’t comfortable with that. The zoo could be miles away and not worth leaving to go anywhere. Also I would never dream if asking adults to pay anything towards kids party, if I couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t have that type of party

I'd drop off or not go.

Not in a public place. Drop offs are for parties in a home at this age

Adults don't need to stay with 6 year-olds.
Party child's parents should pay for all children and any helpers. They do not need to pay guest's parents who choose to stay.

If you can afford it, as you said before, then what’s to think about? Turn down the invite out of a principle that no one will feel the effects of except for your child? Or pay and have a lovely time.

I think it’s because she was being cagey about how she answered the questions. People specifically asked if the invite or parents had actually said that the partygoers parent(s) need to stay with the child, or if she/the child’s father were the ones who were wanting to stay - she just kept replying saying the children were reception age, 4-6 (which neither answers the question and raises an additional one about what 6 year olds are in reception). She was then asked how old HER child specifically is, and she kept saying the group were reception age, 4-6. Again, not answering the question asked.

She still hasn’t said that the invite or parents have specifically said that they have to stay, although she has said the parents expect them to stay, but later mentions that she wouldn’t want to drop and leave.

I suspect that the invite doesn’t say anything about HAVING to stay, but says if they choose to stay it’s £15 per adult. It may well be that the parents of the birthday child already have enough adults (eg 2 parents, 2 sets of grandparents, aunts & uncles) that are either included in the party package cost or they’re paying for - so they don’t want to pay for additional parents to stay when it’s unnecessary if they feel they have enough already. If this is the case, I think the OP is being unreasonable. If the party hosts don’t have enough adults to supervise and/or they specifically said on the invites that all children must have an adult stay with them and the cost for this will be £15 per person, please send this money to X bank details by Y date then the OP is not unreasonable, and the hosts should have booked something they could afford.

I really do think though, based on the vague answers and not wanting to actually answer the questions asked, the hosts haven’t actually said the words that all children must be accompanied.