AIBU to be frustrated by repeated wolf-themed gifts?

[Herecomes]

I am an animal lover, I am especially a dog person meaning I like wolves too if we’re talking wildlife. My mum has taken this to mean I’m obsessed with wolves - I’m really not.

Every year at Christmas she buys me something wolf related … it started off as huge framed pictures (often featuring native Americans too 😂) and in the end I had so many massive pictures piled up the spare room that I made a point of telling her I am no longer buying wall pictures as I don’t like a lot of stuff on the walls and I’ve ran out of space. She got the hint and stopped buying me pictures … instead she started buying me huge blankets, fleece bed covers etc, again featuring wolves howling at the moon, native Americans, wolf eyes staring out of dark trees etc 🤦‍♀️

I ended up with a big pile of fleece blankets that were just sat there collecting dust. In the end I asked her if she wanted any blankets as I’m getting rid of loads as I have far too many and don’t use them. She got the hint.

Now … as my birthday this year was approaching she asked me what size clothing I was. I told her. I joked to DH that I’ll probably end up with a wolf fleece jacket for my birthday … I was wrong … I got 3 wolf fleece jackets for my birthday.

I don’t get it!!! I’m in my 30s, she sees me every week … surely she can see that I don’t wear stuff like this?? It was funny at first but now its getting frustrating. She gets upset and offended easily so I’ve tried to treat lightly but come on …

What would you do?? Or do I just carry on accepting this stuff and lying that I like it to keep the peace?

Isn’t it better that the recipient gets a gift she actually wants rather than giving them to charity each time?

Are Hackney hipsters ironically wearing wolf fleeces still a thing? Used to be about 10 years ago.

"What would you do?? Or do I just carry on accepting this stuff and lying that I like it to keep the peace?"

Since you did ask what people would do -I would tell her i was all wolfed out and I would do it knowing she was going to be mardy about it and I wouldn't care.

But it sounds like thats not something you feel able to do, which is fine. If the comments would bother you more than wolf themed things for the rest of her life then maybe its best to just carry on saying thank you and taking them to a charity shop

This is a good idea!

It would be better. But from what op is describing, she doesn’t get want she wants even when specifically asked for. It seems likely that dm is going to continue buying random tat whatever happens so upsetting her might not be worth it to the OP.

This is funny but also frustrating I feel your pain OP. My dad was dad was like this with random tat or things that were similar to what I asked for but just with added tat factor. Random things he bought off shopping channels. I miss it now he’s not there anymore!

Say I’ve gone off wolves but I love cats! Opens the floodgates for cat themed stuff.

I get this, I like polar bears and every year without fail I get some other tat with a polar bear on 🙈😂

You need to be blunt, ‘mum I don’t want any more wolf stuff, thanks’

The older gifts could be regifted back to the OPs Mum. “I thought you LOVED the wolf theme because you give me so much of it” 🫢 It might just work.

EDITED. Funny funny thread. Thankyou 😀

I see your cat things and raise you...
Cat coasters, matching cat tray, cat teatowel, ceramic cat ashtray come wall hangy thing, ceramic cat biscuit jar (quite like that), cat mugs, glass cat ornament, cat pictures, pens with cats on the end, bath towel and matching hand towel with cats embroidered on them, chocolates that come in cat themed tins, ceramic cat money box, and many other things that I have blocked from my memory.

This is so bloody hilarious 😹

Tell her that you’ve gone off wolves and now you’re into diamond jewellery and designer handbags 🤣

Busy sending link to OP's Mum...

@Herecomes "The sad thing is I’d be more happy with a bar of chocolate, I don’t need “stuff” and am very selective in what I have on show in the house. A £4 toblerone I’d be delighted with"

Right. So here's what you do. You say you've been so inspired by the recent David Attenborough programmes that you'd like her to donate to a Wolf preservation charity in your name. You worry so much about wildlife that it would mean the absolute world to you. You then say that if she really wants to buy you a small personal gift, a box of chocolates or some hand cream would be very much appreciated. That way the wolves win and so do you!

PP mentioned cat solar light. It is something I blocked from my memory and was truly hideous and quite disturbing. So bad I took a photo of it. Real cats hated it and would growl and swipe at it. I present to you the solar cat...

Tell her something u really really like pick something that she can collect for u to give as gifts like silver animal earrings or pendants, something that she will still have the feeling u will really like and gives her enjoyment picking stuff out but won’t take over your home. So she gets the enjoyment of giving and you still get something nice u like.

My late mum was obsessed with buying me owl related gifts! It started off by me liking a owl shaped handbag when I was a teenager up till she died when I was 43 I’d receive owl
related gifts . I’d either regift or sell
on eBay . I did say to her a few times i don’t need any more stuff . Last year my dad gave me an owl necklace as he knew how much I loved owls! I wish owls no harm but I really don’t love them 😂

OP, you've just got to bite the bullet and tell her....no more wolves. Rip the band aid off.

You could tell her you've moved onto the capybara? Harder to find stuff? Don't go for sloths, they're everywhere now.

Sorry OP it made me giggle too.
I had a vision of you sat completely surrounded by wolf items.
Can you give any of it to a charity?

Could you say you had a nightmare about wolves and now you don't like them?

She sounds like a gift giver and you need to give her something to focus on that you would actually appreciate.

Let her take offence. Her emotions are not your responsibility to manage. I'd go absolutely barmy if my mum did this to me for years, and there's no way I could put up with it just to spare her feelings while it made more work for me sorting them and getting rid and practically flushing her money down the drain. I would have to say something.

I was put into that cycle years ago with penguins. I don't even recall telling anyone I liked penguins, but there you have it. :)

They are. Even this one!

It sounds like you’ve got two choices. You can tell her you don’t want more wolf things, and deal with her being offended and disappointed; or you can say nothing and deal with getting a new wolf gift for every occasion. You don’t like either choice, but I think you’ve got to figure out which one is the least-bad to live with.