AIBU to be frustrated by repeated wolf-themed gifts?

[Herecomes]

I am an animal lover, I am especially a dog person meaning I like wolves too if we’re talking wildlife. My mum has taken this to mean I’m obsessed with wolves - I’m really not.

Every year at Christmas she buys me something wolf related … it started off as huge framed pictures (often featuring native Americans too 😂) and in the end I had so many massive pictures piled up the spare room that I made a point of telling her I am no longer buying wall pictures as I don’t like a lot of stuff on the walls and I’ve ran out of space. She got the hint and stopped buying me pictures … instead she started buying me huge blankets, fleece bed covers etc, again featuring wolves howling at the moon, native Americans, wolf eyes staring out of dark trees etc 🤦‍♀️

I ended up with a big pile of fleece blankets that were just sat there collecting dust. In the end I asked her if she wanted any blankets as I’m getting rid of loads as I have far too many and don’t use them. She got the hint.

Now … as my birthday this year was approaching she asked me what size clothing I was. I told her. I joked to DH that I’ll probably end up with a wolf fleece jacket for my birthday … I was wrong … I got 3 wolf fleece jackets for my birthday.

I don’t get it!!! I’m in my 30s, she sees me every week … surely she can see that I don’t wear stuff like this?? It was funny at first but now its getting frustrating. She gets upset and offended easily so I’ve tried to treat lightly but come on …

What would you do?? Or do I just carry on accepting this stuff and lying that I like it to keep the peace?

Now you see, my son is obsessed with wolves and would be truly delighted if I bought him piles of wolf things. But he’s autistic and not a woman in her 30s. You have my sympathies OP, my DM buys me some very random things and takes offence very easily if I suggest it’s not right. Earlier this year she discovered I like a certain brand of body products, so she bought me a whole box for my birthday. Only she bought the only four products for men out of the whole range (I’m not a man). I’ve smiled politely and given then to DH.

Edited to add YANBU.

I know it’s wrong but this made me howl.

I can sympathise. My mother also takes offence very easily at any perceived slight. One Christmas she bought be sleeping tablets from the pharmacy. Still have no idea why and didn’t dare ask

I like owls, probably as much as I like wolves but I’m being very careful not to let her know 😂

Sleeping tablets??? 😂😂😂 that’s bizarre but I’d probably make use of them to be fair 😂

Invite her round for bonfire night and ceremoniously burn every single wolf item she's ever bought you!

So why not tell her what you would like? Start early, months before a birthday/Christmas.

This might be a perfect solution. DM the OP your address so she can offload all her unwanted wolf paraphernalia onto your son. 😂

Maybe lean into the fact that you like real life animals and encourage that rather than wolf themed accessories.

E.g. do you like zoo trips? If so you could suggest a contribution to that so you can see the wolves in person as well as the other animals! Wildwood near Canterbury is good. Or at Port Lympne you can stay in a glamping pod next to the wolves.

Or revert to the dogs - husky sledding in the cairngorms?

To people suggesting I tell her what I want … I tried that, I told her I really wanted some mugs I’d seen … sent her the link.

She bought me mugs but not the right ones along with a wolf blanket and a wooden wolf plaque for the wall 🤦‍♀️

Don't tell her what you don't like. Just say mum it's my birthday coming up and I really need xyz or I love this chocolate bar this wine etc. and drop massive hints

When my mum died, I had a friend who bombarded me with Robin stuff. Apparently there is a belief that robins have the souls of departed loved ones.

Robin memes daily, that turned into cards with Robins on, then the robin merch started- random shite with Robins on (baskets, mugs, coasters). It did slow down eventually but I still get robinshite on the anniversary on when she died and mum's birthday, and mothers day etc.
Her heart was in the right place, but it was really wearing after a while. I am fairly minimalist and don't do ornaments, clutter etc.
Me and my sister have a dark sense of humour and now compete with who can find the tackiest robinshite and send pics to each other.

I was going to suggest I could send him the blankets but I would imagine the poster won’t want to give her address out on here ☺️

Thank you. I’ve I’ve put it on the pile with the other ones”

Each time

I feel your pain.

I like mid century furniture.

So my extended family have decided I love all things 1950s, especially Elvis Presley. No. I don’t.

I get Elvis themed everything. I have told them, nicely in the past but it keeps on coming.

That's because there used to be a cartoon on TV with a character that used to say, "It's the wolef. It's the Wolef. IT'S THE WOOOLLEEEEFFFFFF!"

I think he was a lamb called 'Lambsie' and he was shouting to a sheepdog but I'm buggered if I can remember the name of the cartoon. I dare not Google it or I will get a shit load of wolf related stuff come up!

Or maybe you just say "thanks for the wolf stuff mum, but I don't want to overdo it and end up with a wolf 'theme' so I don't need anymore. If you're stuck for ideas I'm really into <insert interest here>".

She's going to be more offended if you don't tell her and let her waste her money while you laugh about it behind her back for the next however many years.

Ok this genuinely made me laugh 😂😂 Elvis! 🤣

if nothing else this thread has cheered me up and reminded me not to take it so seriously ☺️

My mum does this to DH but weirdly with salted caramel items. I keep telling her but she doesn't really listen. She also went through a phase for several years of buying me clothing in a 14-16 (I am 10-12). Who knows.

OP maybe.... wait for the next birthday that is not yours and make a big thing that with the cost of living, you are only getting / receiving USEFUL things, not decorative. Or, instead, that since "people have so much stuff these days" you are only buying food/ wine gifts.

Then reinforce like hell right before your own bday?

Theres a woman on tik tok whose family and friends keep buying her novelty salt and pepper shakers 😂 she has no idea how it started but she reluctantly has quite the collection

The sad thing is I’d be more happy with a bar of chocolate, I don’t need “stuff” and am very selective in what I have on show in the house. A £4 toblerone I’d be delighted with

The trouble is, I feel like someone like this will buy you horrible crap no matter what. So even if you put her off wolves, all that means is she’ll then get you some other tacky rubbish.

My MIL is like this - she’s one that will buy anything with your name on. Imagine the gift section of a card shop with bookmarks, pictures of angels, candles, trinket boxes etc. I’ve tried to push her more towards things I like (like wine!) and she then gets me that plus the trinkets with my name on. I’m nearly 40, I don’t really want a tote bag with my name written out in flowers on it!

Oh my mum bought me salt and pepper shakers once! Guess the theme … 😂😂 they’re in the spare room which has become like a wolf shrine.

if I died and people came to clear out my house they would think I genuinely had an unhealthy obsession with wolves. They’d probably assume I had mental health issues anyway.

Oh dear. Could you open a wolf eBay shop to sell it on? Also like cat lady above, tell her you like actual wolves not wolf stuff. I doubt she will buy you a pack of wolves. Fingers crossed

I had a neighbour who’s house was full of duck themed items for this same reason 😆

Fern Brady has a bit about this but with her cats