To pretend I cooked the restaurant food- dinner party

[Dual]

I’m hosting a dinner party for 7 guests tonight. I’m a truly shit cook, and my guests amongst them have loads of dietary requirements - vegan, gluten free and nut free, and one guest only likes Chinese or Italian cuisine.

i have also had to work late every day this week. I decided last night instead that I’d order from a vegan Chinese restaraunt today that clearly lists all nut free and gluten free dishes.

im embarrassed to admit ive not cooked myself, so aibu to put them into my own dishes and pass them off as my own cooking tonight?

I'd rather people thought I was a poor cook or even lazy, than a liar!

Definitely don't do this.......... 😂

If they’re all foodies, they’d prefer to know it was cooked at a proper restaurant rather than a packet sauce meal!!

Don't do it, you'll look like a fool if they ask any basic question about the food and you cant answer it.

There's nothing wrong with buying in.

As someone who loves Chinese food, I would bet that the sauces made by a good restaurant are miles better than packet sauces. And that discerning guests will know the difference.

Again, I cannot imagine why you perceive that there is any loss of face in giving your guests good restaurant food, well presented? I would do it and I love to cook.

Honestly this is a good way to weed out false friends.

Simply ‘Sorry I’ve had the week from hell so I’ve ordered from X for us all, it’s all nut/whatever free’ would suffice. If anyone is mortally offended then perhaps they’re not really a real friend anyway. If it were me I’d just be grateful you were still hosting us in the first place!

As someone with a serious food allergy I would be absolutely furious if I found out someone I trusted to cook for me had in fact actually ordered takeout. It would be bad enough if you were "just" lying to friends but lying to friends in a way that also potentially risks their health is just wrong.

If they are into food and cooking, they will know. A few conversational questions about ingredients and preparation and you will have a hard time.

I would be open, but explain it as "when I compiled all preferences and allergies in the group, there weren't many choices and I don't have experience preparing tofu/gluten free at home, so I went for the safe option".

It doesn't mean you are really bad cook, just unsure in this specific area, so you prefered a safe result.

No, no, no.

Just order in and style it out.

Friends understand being v busy / delayed at work / etc - if you lie about anything just say your supermarket delivery didn't arrive but luckily you have a local restaurant..

Really OP, you have nothing to feel embarrassed about here.

Italian food you might get away with it, but vegan Chinese?! No chance. They’ll use all sorts of ingredients you won’t be able to blag and MSG and all sorts to make the food.

Honestly, save yourself the embarrassment of being caught and just own it!

@Dual The allergy thing would trouble me. I would tell the truth and just say you had a shit week. If something went wrong with allergies and they thought you'd cooked the food, then it will be you that suffers the consequences.

This. Unless you are the nut allergy sufferer, you can't do this. Chinese restaurants are a no go zone for many nut allergies. Especially peanut and cashew.

But you're worried about looking lazy or like an incompetent cook. So it makes no sense to say you used packet sauces.

The thing I'd be worried about was dietary requirements. For example if your gluten free friend is coeliac it's not enough to know that they are marked as gluten free on the menu, you need to know that nothing has been fried in oil with anything else containing gluten at any point, it has been prepared with separate utentils, prepped in a separate area of the kitchen to prevent cross contamination. Unfortunately 'gluten free' in the uk doesn't need to meet any of these requirements and can just mean gluten free by ingredients - not that it's safe for your friend. So you'd have to Google what specific questions to ask the kitchen to make sure it was safe.

What will you do if they ask if any of the meals contain x ingredient?

If you like — although they’ll likely guess when the MSG kicks in later and everyone has a furious thirst 😂

What if they ask for the recipe??

You’ll be so stressed about being rumbled it will ruin your evening. People will just be grateful to you for inviting and hosting and making sure their needs and likes were catered for!

If anyone’s shitty about it they will make themselves look like an absolute fucking twat.

Just tell them. They won't care that it's restaurant food, but they will definitely care if you lie to them and they find out.

I’m someone who wouldn’t give a flying fig if I bought ready made food in for guests, especially if they had such wide dietary choices. In fact, I’d probably send them a link to the menu and ask them what they’d like me to order for them!

It's fine. Like others have said, they are there to enjoy the evening and the company and good food wherever it comes from. You are still hosting them! You shouldn't have to impress anyone with your cooking skills.

I also think that to say you "only like" Chinese or Italian food is ridiculous and shouldn't be pandered to! It doesn't even make much sense when Chinese and Italian foods can be so different, both within each cuisine and across the two.

And passing it off as my own work would just be too stressful and not conduicive to a relaxed evening at all!

I might send a message to the group in advance, letting them know that I'd decided to order in as I had been so busy (and not the greatest cook at the best of times). I might feel awkward about it in the moment if everyone came expecting home cooked.

I do think Chinese takeaway is very distinctive and unlikely to be taken as home cooked.

Ha! I would totally do this. I have regularly done this for school bake sales when I've forgotten/ran out of time 😂 I didn't technically say I made them, just squashed them a bit/put them in my own tupperware to make them look like I'd done them. Someone asked me outright once and I just confessed as I can't lie properly.

Maybe serve it up in your serving dishes and say nothing unless someone outright asks you? Surely then if you just admit how busy and exhausted you've been people will understand?!

I used to be a professional cook and would be happy to be served restaurant food at a friend's house! You seem intent on lying - why make things harder for yourself? Just say you decided to get food from a restaurant because it would be better than anything you could make!

Send them a photo of the menu and say "I'm ordering in tonight (my treat! Wine provided (also not home-made!). Let me know your order and I'll take care of it. Can't wait to see you all at 7".