AIBU to be baffled a mum had no idea the school fayre was happening?

[xAwaywiththefairiesx]

Today my daughter's primary school had a spring fayre after school on the school field. Ice cream van, face-painting, various stalls with games, the usual. All arranged by the PTA to raise money for the school.
There was a mufti day today, and the children were asked to bring a donation to the school as an exchange for the mufti, something like cakes to sell or a teddy for the tombola or a bottle of wine as a prize or something.
One mum wanders onto the field after school, with both of her kids in mufti, looking around bewildered saying "What's this? Is this a new thing they're doing? Will it be every week?"

And this is so weird to me because the spring fayre has been organised for months. We have lots of emails asking for donations, several more asking for volunteers, we've had at least three leaflets home about it, and she obviously got the memo about mufti, the whole point in which was for the school fayre!

My phone own child has been banging on about it for three weeks.

How can she get so unaware? I'm not judging, honestly, I'm just baffled how it got past her.

Is it just me? Could you miss something like this after all that communication?

I KNOW! That's what got me the most 😂

Whenever the weather starts picking up, the school opens the field for the kids to use as a playground at lunchtime, and they've just opened up the field for this year. So I assume she thought this big fayre, with an ice cream van, bouncy castle, hot dogs, face-painting and various stalls was also a new thing they were doing for the warmer months. Just as an after school treat on a Friday 😂

I wonder if she also thought mufti on a Friday was a new weekly thing. That would actually explain how she knew to put her kids in mufti but had no idea why

And “mufti”.

It’s 2026 and apparently bloody Streeting’s about to launch a leadership challenge. He’s not fit to govern a PTA, let alone an empire.

Maybe schools should go back to being schools, and stop holding extra non-educational events every other day? It’s all too much for the working parents.

To be fair, it doesn’t sound that stupid if you’re taught it in school aged 4. Then it’s just a word. As a child I just accepted it as a word for not wearing uniform. Plenty of words sound a bit funny if you stop and think about them, or if you’re only introduced to them as an adult.

I got 6 emails from my kids school today! 6!!!! 4 of which required me to do something! In addition my youngest is at nursery at a different school and I get their tirade of comms too! Add to that that gymnastics announcements are on Facebook, there is a PTA WhatsApp group for both schools, a Judo WhatsApp group, a bus WhatsApp Group, separate emails from the other gymnastics club, a Football WhatsApp group (plus an extra app).

I work 4 days a week (quite often til 10pm), travel a lot with work. My husband works full time. We have 3 kids. I am on both school parents councils, help at every event, volunteer for local activities.

I have never yet missed an event, but I am hanging on by my fingernails. It is exhausting! I'm not surprised some people decide fuck it and ignore it all!!

So jealous of my mum's generation where letters came home in school bags and at worst you were bombarded once a day. This constant communication is a bloody nightmare!

I was venting to my husband about similar just this morning. On our sons WhatsApp over the last few days there have been parents asking questions about an event happening today. One parent put up a screen shot of all the details but I then other parents were still asking questions that were clearly answered in the screen shot they just couldn’t be bothered to read the actual details and needed the answers spelled out to them. It was pure laziness. This isn’t the first time either it happens regularly. No language barrier or issues with English demonstrated as the questions they asked were well written.
missing the odd event because you have a lot on or are busy is completely understandable but our school only communicate through the school app and give plenty of warning so not hard for these parents to find the info they need.

There was a mum at primary who had no idea what was going on. Every time there was an event/school trip/early finish she would complain she hadn’t had the letter, no one told her, her DD wasn’t given a letter etc.
She would go into the school and complain frequently.
I remember standing in her kitchen and the letter with all key dates was on her fridge in full view.

I don't think I could have "2ndcarowner" as a username. That's cringey AF.

But as people rightly point out, we are all different, aren't we?

I’m not even talking about non-educational things. I’m aware of complaints that the next year’s terms dates haven’t been sent - yes they have. Or that there was no communication that the head teacher was leaving - yes there was. I’m always most confused by someone taking the time to email the complaint, without first just quickly double checking that they are in fact correct about it not being communicated.

Also to your point about schools doing non-educational things, OP is talking about a PTA event to raise money for the school. Our PTA funds a huge amount of great educational stuff.

What does mufti mean though, like where does it come from and how does it mean non uniform?

What area of the UK is this in?

It's been explained several times in this thread and is freely available via Google.

Ironic really given the thread is about people refusing to read information provided multiple times and choosing to remain confused.

Fayres are optional and run by the PTA to raise money for the school, which benefits the children. You're welcome.

And every single parent on our PTA is a working parent, as are most parents actually. Our amazing PTA members and committee not only manage to read emails, they run the events too. Again, welcome.

We had mufti days in the 80s/90s when I was at school - central England.

She’s probably like me. Sole breadwinner with her partner being in charge of all that. Why are you shocked it’s a “mum”? And not a “dad”? Steroptyping much?

I’m in Scotland it’s always been dress down day where I am.

I'm this parent, I will often see info about things, however the actual date will go out my head then creep up and I’ve totally forgot but my kids are good at keeping up.
Also I don’t think it helps that the schools bombard me with emails and random stuff on the apps which is basically ‘junk mail’ and not important to me like things happening in the area, PTA stuff which I’ve never been involved in, so I’ve got into a habit of overlooking a lot of stuff.

👏💯🎯

Not in Yorkshire!

Because she was a mum and not a dad. HTH

Not from the UK but we def didn't have more or less bullying than in uniformwearing schools.

How can people not have heard of a mufti day??? I am 49 and it has always been Mufti!

Believe me it's very easy to miss this ..we get about 100 messages a day from the school and life is busy...if I didn't have friends reminding me I'd forget too. .I missed off sock day for example. I miss letters home rather than emails.

That doesn’t help unless you are all in on sexist stereotypes. HTH

It was definitely mufti day at my schools in Yorkshire in the 90s.

I'm not particularly PC, but I always thought mufti was a bit outdated, offensive somehow. In the it was OK in the 70s kind of way.

That’s because it actually IS outdated and offensive. Tho PP’s pic of the shocked dog has made me chuckle.