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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if anyone lives on a small Scottish Island?

276 replies

NewStartFamily · Today 14:20

Specifically Eday or Tiree but thoughts and opinions of any others very welcome!

DP and I are considering a relocation from the south coast to Scotland, somewhere with land we can use.

We have found a couple of properties that we like but we’d like to hear thoughts from people who live there about how life works in the smaller communities and places where not everything is on your doorstep.

We have one home educated son aged 9 so nearby schools not an essential consideration.

OP posts:
ReadingSoManyThreads · Today 19:42

Contrarymary30 · Today 19:39

I would be more concerned about your son being extremely socially isolated . I think it would be very unfair on him especially as he's not even meeting other children at school .

But there will be other children on the isle. All of my home educated children's friends attend schools. There will be activities where her child will meet the local children and make friends that way. A lot of communities on these islands are very close knit, and all it takes is a little effort from them to enable their son to make friends.

Kepler22B · Today 19:43

It is very hard to give you proper advise if you don’t say what you are looking for.

You want some land, why? To run a croft, to grown your own veg, just to have your own space?

What are your plans to earn money? Work from home remotely would find integrating harder than a primary teacher.

You will get different answer if people understand your circumstances better. I am beginning to worry you are moving away rather than to something.

Heraldry · Today 19:44

We lived on an island for 20 years, and will always miss it…what brought us off was my DD going to Uni and this bringing it home that IF anything bad happened to her I would be at the mercy of ferry and aeroplane times to start getting to her. I had already had it in one way when my parents died on the mainland, and I had to wait. I knew we had to move. We’ve now lived rural Highlands for years and love it, but can always start travelling to loved ones at a moment’s notice and that is a huge relief.

Framboisery · Today 19:46

I was watching an iplayer programme on with Miss Hoolie* and husband going Wild Swimming - this was on coastal mainland Scotland. Looked incredibly picturesque. May be worth watching if you're considering the mainland.

*Julie and Greg go wild Swimming.

Heronwatcher · Today 19:51

I think you should really scrutinise your reasons.

Also what would happen if your son’s special needs got worse? If he did need lots of input from health services (physical or mental) or if he even needed supported living? What will he do for uni/ work?

Do you and your partner have strong mental health? Because to be frank you would need it. In terms of the winters they can really break people- actually lots of islanders aren’t outdoorsy- they go everywhere in a car. And the winters are absolutely brutal, it’s not the case of grey days and drizzle, think sideways rain, gale force winds and never getting properly light. Genuinely impossible to go outside properly on some days.

The other thing is that as incomers you absolutely can’t fall out with anyone. Ever. The most minor row can take on spectacular significance. Plus you will bump into your enemy about 6 times a day and they are probably the harbourmaster, owner of the local shop and drive the bus. So you and your entire family need to be tactful, prepared to adapt, not seek to inflict your ideas on others and also willing to build bridges with people who aren’t like you. And bear in mind that you might never be truly accepted.

Chasingfairies · Today 19:52

Wiffywombat · Today 19:15

So you have other children

But for some reason you don’t need to consider them (or even mention them in your Op). Ok.

And you don’t think relevant how you and your partner currently earn a living. Ok

Those details aren’t relevant to her question though, she’s already explained the other kids don’t need to be factored into her decision, it’s none of anyone’s business why and she’ll obviously have considered work and how she’s going to afford to live. Those aren’t the things she’s asking about. Why do people on MN feel the need to know every last detail about someone’s life when it’s not even related to the question?

Heronwatcher · Today 19:53

Could you consider living on a remote coastal peninsula instead (like the Cowal peninsula)? Also what would you want to do with the land? If you’re thinking of crofting, sheep or crops lots of land just won’t be suitable, especially on the islands which are basically granite in the main!

NewStartFamily · Today 19:55

Chasingfairies · Today 19:52

Those details aren’t relevant to her question though, she’s already explained the other kids don’t need to be factored into her decision, it’s none of anyone’s business why and she’ll obviously have considered work and how she’s going to afford to live. Those aren’t the things she’s asking about. Why do people on MN feel the need to know every last detail about someone’s life when it’s not even related to the question?

Thank you so much for this.

OP posts:
CharleneElizabethBaltimore · Today 19:57

NewStartFamily · Today 19:42

Yes but that’s if you have posters who would actually interested and aren’t just trying to prove an unfathomable point.

Which the majority are but they aren’t the ones who asked for an update.

ill admit ive not read the full thread and i must have missed the context etc
personally im intrigued because the winters are ment to be different, i can accept the isolation etc but its more the supplie lines that would puzzle me etc

DampSquad · Today 20:14

albalass · Today 17:34

I didn't realise that, I thought they said they'd moved there for his partner's cheese making business or something like that 🤔. Oh well, a different life for the celebs!

Just re-reading what I wrote I've made it sound that it was Banjo AND his partner being commissioned but it was just Banjo so perhaps his partner was a cheese maker and decided to set up there.

Sorry for not being clearer.

FeministThrowingAPrincessParty · Today 20:14

museumum · Today 16:33

I've worked with a few island communities and my only advice is that they are each very very very different. The history of land ownership on each island, the current landowner and the religious history will have a HUGE impact on your experience of moving there.
It's complicated to describe but the crofting tradition will affect how people feel about you buying land - it might be that the community feels the property you bought 'should have been' somebody else's by right.
Islands with a strong reformation protestant tradition feel very different from islands that never reformed and remained catholic, and this permeates all aspects of the community even if you're 'not religious' (maybe especially if you're not religious).
Islands owned by the community are generally quite open but require a large input from community members to join (you must do something to help the community and help the trust to be accepted).
Some islands have a benign absentee landowner, a few have a resident one who is friendly, but some struggle with their landowner.
And then there's the crofting commission which you should understand if you wish to buy land https://www.crofting.scotland.gov.uk/

Finally - as others have mentioned, education and healthcare - think FAR ahead to your son's secondary education and beyond and your own old age in terms of access to both of these.

This is fascinating!

MrsMoastyToasty · Today 20:15

I don't live on a Scottish island but my BIL lives on Mull and we've been visiting him for over 30 years over various seasons.

Ferries are one issue. Calmac have summer and winter timetables, with fewer crossings in the winter. DH visited his DB once and was stuck on Mull for 2 exttra days because high seas meant all ferries were cancelled. The only aircraft are privately owned as there's no airport. BIL had a medical emergency and had to be helicoptered from the school playing field to Glasgow.

Tinytimmy123 · Today 20:20

I watch a young woman on YouTube Caroline McQuiston im sure she would be happy if you DM'd her to answer any questions. She has just moved house within the area and is renovating her new house on Isle of Skye.

Chipsahoy · Today 20:24

Would you consider mainland? We moved to Aberdeenshire from midlands. Land and very rural, amazing views plus the sea. We are close to the Cairngorms as well. Good infrastructure and plenty of “incomers”. The locals are just lovely and friendly. Schools are teeny, mine has just 20 total, so no need to homeschool anymore as it is just like a home away from home for them.

The islands are beautiful but perhaps start out on the mainland and rent there?

someonethatyoulovetoomuch · Today 20:25

Hi OP, I relocated from the SE to Scotland 5 years ago, we’re mainland in the north east so not island experience but would be happy to chat to you about our experience if you want to PM me 😊

Sharptonguedwoman · Today 20:34

bafta16 · Today 19:31

Gulf stream

Yes and looks lush. Just checked the average temperatures- 6deg C in Winter, 16deg C in summer. Very mild. 1500mm rain though, which one would expect.

DreamTheMoors · Today 20:35

BuffetTheDietSlayer · Today 14:34

You really should spend a winter living there before making a permanent move. Winter on the islands is nothing like English winters.

This is the very best, most accurate, perfect advice for moving anywhere to live permanently.
It takes the romance right out of it.
Thank you, @BuffetTheDietSlayer ❤️

828Pax · Today 20:37

I can't offer a personal view however a friend relocated last year and is utterly miserable due to the lack of socialising she is able to do, and she wasn't a terribly social person in the first place!

Glitterandmud · Today 20:42

I'm in rural NE Scotland op, only had a couple of holidays to the islands so can't comment on living there but i'd recommend looking here, there's lots of incomers in this area and it's generally welcoming. There's a good home ed community up here too or small rural schools if you decide to go that way. Winters can be bleak here too but summers can be brilliant and you have the transport links. Property prices have tumbled in recent years, have a look on the aspc website. Good luck!

bafta16 · Today 20:43

ReadingSoManyThreads · Today 19:42

But there will be other children on the isle. All of my home educated children's friends attend schools. There will be activities where her child will meet the local children and make friends that way. A lot of communities on these islands are very close knit, and all it takes is a little effort from them to enable their son to make friends.

I think 9 going on 10 is a tricky age to make friends.

LittleMyLabyrinth · Today 20:49

Can't speak to Scotland specifically, but I grew up on a very small island in North America. Small community, very harsh winters. We loved it. Not for everyone, but for a specific kind of person it's lovely. We were quite outdoorsy and didn't mind driving a couple of hours to go to 'town'.

user1476613140 · Today 20:53

rainbowunicorn · Today 17:55

It's no though, when coming from the perspective of Islamd living. If you decided to homeschool on Tiree for example, not saying you definitely will, but that would be viewed as strange and not willing to integrate. It's not like homeschooling in a large town or city whereabouts can build a community with otber homeschoolers.
Island life is about being a part of a community, they way islanders see it is a family taking precious family sized accommodation but not giving back in terms of sending the children to the school, helping to keep it viable and get the funding it needs to keep going. It is hard for born and bred islanders when tbey are priced out of their local community by people coming in. They often have to move away to the mainland because of this. It is a very fine balance trying to integrate into a rural island community. With respect your OP dosen't seem to take account of this with the comment about not needing to be near a school. The comments about being quite hardy and outdoorsy have been heard a thousand times before by the islanders. It's all fine till the first winter storm when the powers is out for days and the broadband for weeks. The storm of January 25 had the broadband down for months on Tiree.

This poster holds valid points relating to island life. My DH was good friends with a guy who stayed on Rum for much of his 20s and it really is true. Everyone works together to build that community often with volunteering a big part of island life to help with integration. He did deer stalking but also mountain rescue roster too.

DreamTheMoors · Today 20:54

I know very little of Scotland except what I read here from actual Scottish people and those who know actual Scottish people.

But when I read about being at the mercy of ferries or the islands themselves needing income, I think this is where being a billionaire is for - not marrying a plastic weirdo.

An island is in need of funds?
Anonymously donated.
An island is in need of a regular, dependable ferry?
Anonymously donated, complete with captain.
Wildfires destroyed your homes?
What do you need? Name it, it’s done, anonymously.

The good you could do with that kind of money astounds me.
And Lordy I’d love to try.
Just give me the chance.

Narwhalsh · Today 20:54

If you’re only looking on rightmove then you are missing a bunch of properties. In Scotland different regions have different ‘solicitor property centres’ who advertise majority of properties, eg ESPC, ASPC, GSPC, HSPC

user1476613140 · Today 20:56

Possible life boat stuff too. He's also lived on mainland before he got married and did mountain rescue in a remote location near Mallaig.