Things that are supposed to be enjoyable but aren't in reality

[Tooconfused12]

Here's my list:

Holidays with the family (kids under the age of 6.) Too expensive, the kids are always tired/vomiting/over-stimulated. Travelling is a fucking nightmare. There's at least two arguments with your partner. And you (being the woman) end up doing all the prep for about three weeks beforehand. When you come back it takes at least a week for you to get through all the washing. And you're exhausted.

Being on the beach. It's actually a bit shit all round. Sand everywhere. People get too hot and uncomfortable. Sand in the food. Warm drinks that have been left out in the sun. The kids end up with sand in their eyes and so do you. It's always really windy and the sea is miles out which means you have to walk for ages to get there. Someone gets bitten/cut by a rock/sunburnt/swallows loads of sea water and you give up and leave after about 2 hours of drama.

Eating out. Too expensive, better quality of cooking at home with fresh ingredients.

Paris. Dirty, smelly, you're followed everywhere by sleazy men trying to sell you stuff or pickpocket you. Everyone's really fucking rude as well

Having sex. It's a bit touch and go, most of the time it's slightly boring, the bloke normally orgasms before you and the people you really fancy - when you end up shagging it turns out to be rubbish after all that build up. Or they ooze sex appeal and charisma but they do something to give you the serious ick and your vagina slams shut.

Hen do's - end of.

I don't like having my hair done, I can cope with the cutting , but not the washing and definitely not blow drying where they use the brush to put tension on and dry the hair
I have got round this as I cannot avoid haircuts , by washing my hair before I go in, so if they wash it again ( sometimes I gave get away with them spraying it). No blow drying . At home I use a Dyson Airstrait .

I LOVE Christmas and I love the planning . But the shopping.....
I write lists , I queue up. People are wankers in shops at Christmas . I cannot find things , they're out of stock , I talk myself out of it .
Carrying bags after two shops . Take things back to the car hope no-one breaks into it)
Try to find a decent toilet or somewhere to eat ( always imagine a nice restaurant or tea room)
Easiest to shop online and do the Real Life just poncing about ( I get FOMO)

I've done my fill of Christmas Markets now , been to UK and Bruge and Amsterdam. Done

Most parties
Hen weekends

Spas, although I love a bath and a pampering session in the comfort of my own home

Shopping with a friend

Taster menus

My mil had a Christmas birthday. So she decided to celebrate it in July. Nicer weather, less stress, and the focus could be on her.

Have you considered doing that?

You are obviously a glass half full kinda person. Well done on making the most of life!

Oh beaches, I get beach jealousy.
Seeing the ladies that remove their clothes effortlessly (I nearly fall over taking my shorts off).
Apply cream effortlessly.
Lie down first time and stay like that (I fidget to get comfy). Turn onto their front in one swift move (yeah I don't).
Tan all round with absolutely no red bits and no lying at funny angles to get their sides tanned.
Never appear to have sand stuck to them, ever.
Get re-dressed effortlessly and their clothes are never creased (mine look like they've been in the washing basket for a week).
Hair is immaculate (I look like a sweaty worzel gummidge).
Rinse their feet at the tap (no effort) and slip their shoes back on and walk away (my sandals rub my feet because they are still wet).
I don't like the beach 😁

I’m glad I’m not the only one who hates weddings. In a PP, I mentioned about hate wearing the stiff pretty dresses and unable to wear nice pretty shoes.

I want to hear from you lot if you hate wearing dressy clothes and unable to wear dressy pretty shoes

I remember reading an article years ago about a 9 year old who'd just found out about sex. She wasn't too impressed with the idea but her main concern was where people put their legs. Her mum said people just work it out but she wasn't convinced.

Where I live, when the weather gets hot, everyone (except me as I don't like beaches) goes to West Wittering. It's The Law.

Although I assume most of them never get there as they can't all fit and have to slum it at some other less aspirationally middle class beach.

I went to see Swan Lake (first ballet) recently and it was amazing. Ballet dancers possess many talents I can only dream of having! Completely in awe the whole time.

If it helps, you can search online for the synopsis and storyline of most operas and ballets, and find out what the heck it's all about before you go. The programmes rarely tell you enough as they tend to assume the audience will already know; and you don't have time to read it in between buying it and the lights go down anyway.

I'm definitely with you on spa days and pampering etc. My idea of hell.

My birthday is Jan. Rubbish weather, places like NT places are shut. I have a day in May- July departure on what plans are

We have a lot of garden centres around where I live and although they are always busy and popular, they are mostly overpriced and expensive. I don’t get the love for them, but one has a nice cafe so I go for that.
Totally agree about beaches and sand and rocks and seaweed. It’s all gross and with some beaches not being that clean in the UK , I’m not sure I’m ever going to sit on one ever again! I’ve never been keen to be fair.

I cannot be doing with all day sitting at the pool and/or beach. It’s boring.

As to walking on pebbled beaches with bare feet - it’s painful

Outside eating.
Hot weather.

I think it's interesting in that it makes me think about social pressure. We are told to like X or Y and if you don't you feel or are made to feel a little odd. There is something about travelling I struggle with - I keep thinking the locals must be really irritated with us tourists. I grew up in a touristy area so I think that might be why. As a kid I loved the tourists and so did my Dad but lots of my family didn't.

Theme Parks

This thread. Miserable killjoys

pantomimes
musicals
wild swimming
scuba diving in UK
camping and caravans
road trips
holidays in the UK, especially centre parcs
karaoke
bonfires
work meals out
conference hotel facilities
running
facials
bed and breakfast stays
“all you can eat” buffets

Baking with children. Fuck that. I'm sure it has already been said but I confess I have not read the whole thread because who has time for that 🤷‍♀️

Eating out. Expensive and stressful. You troll into the city center which is full of drunks and wierdos. Then you have to fins a taxi to get home. No thanks. Pefer to eat in.

Agree with:
Theme parks
Avocados
Camping
Most events with lots of people

Also can’t get on board with:
Yoga
Alcohol
Saunas
Haloumi (the texture - urgh)

But love, love, love a massage and also eating out!

Sharing s bath. Not even if you paid me.

We’re abroad at the moment, the clothes shopping with two kids under 6 to get us here was a total pain. Trying to pack the day before and remember about a zillion things for everyone, the travelling, the room sharing. It all is massively hard and we work hard for this. Though the hotel, food and drink is doing a sterling job of keep me sane.

Hate beaches! Love snow whilst inside, massive letdown outside.

Agree Christmas markets are a rip off and always a disappointment.

Any family day out always ends up in chaos and feels way more effort than it was worth. We all know the Insta photos do not show reality for anyone!!

Sushi, I just don’t get it! 🤔

Try as I might it doesn’t appear to taste of anything but insipid cold rice. Looks pretty tho.