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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Interested to know what others think about this article on BBC?

143 replies

boundarysponge · 18/04/2026 18:08

My weekly juggling act - being a teacher to other children and a mum to my own https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c5yvvr5z2pro

A woman with medium-length brown hair wearing a bright yellow jumper smiling, she is sat down on a brown leather sofa with a blue and white stars blanket draped over it.

My weekly juggling act - teaching other children and being a mum to my own

Many teachers say they struggle to balance the pressures of their job with the demands of being a parent.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c5yvvr5z2pro

OP posts:
newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:00

AllTheChaos · 18/04/2026 18:52

I don’t actually know anyone for whom that is the case! It’s very job dependent I guess, but everyone I know works evenings and weekends to catch uo

Everyone? Amongst my circle this is not routine. Occasional, yes. Every week, no.

Tutorpuzzle · 18/04/2026 19:03

Most ‘dad teachers’ , @NobodysChildNow ,magically find themselves in senior management and out of the classroom (where the real stress lies) before they’ve had kids. Or, if they do have children, the fairies (mothers) deal with everything at home.

But I agree, something about that article set my teeth on edge.

SpellItOutBecauseTheDogIsListening · 18/04/2026 19:04

boundarysponge · 18/04/2026 18:42

I really don’t have a chip on my shoulder. There is a teacher shortage in some parts of the UK. In some areas there are very few vacancies because it’s a well paid, good job. I really don’t hate teachers, I’m saying it isn’t a unique situation and other people are agreeing (largely)

I don’t think it’s a well paid job at all, especially with the behaviour in schools from some children and from their parents too.

I have 2 teachers in my family. For the work they do which is mainly a
7.30 - 17.00 day, plus about 5 hours marking and planning throughout the week, working some days in the holidays either at home or in school for revision sessions, extra trips etc, I think it’s a very poorly paid job.

I work in finance, earn a lot more than they do, work from home, have a lot of flexibility, don’t get shouted at or threatened by kids and their parents and have a lot less stress. It’s no wonder fewer people are training to be teachers and lots are leaving. If teaching was as easy as some say, more would want to do it and remain doing it.

greenteaandlimes · 18/04/2026 19:04

My feeling is that it was absolutely accurate - and I’ve been telling my DH all these points exactly for months.
It is the same for all working mums, but especially so for teachers, as there is no wfh flexibility.
Basically being a working mum is absolute shite. IMHO.

EwwPeople · 18/04/2026 19:06

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:00

Everyone? Amongst my circle this is not routine. Occasional, yes. Every week, no.

Not every teacher will do that either though.

AllTheChaos · 18/04/2026 19:06

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:00

Everyone? Amongst my circle this is not routine. Occasional, yes. Every week, no.

Absolutely routine in my circle (mostly senior level lawyers and finance wonks but a few senior civil servants too)

TheGreatDownandOut · 18/04/2026 19:07

I have always wondered how nurses cope tbh. Especially female ones.

MyLimeGuide · 18/04/2026 19:08

Yep more pointless boring crap from the shitty BBC

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:09

AllTheChaos · 18/04/2026 19:06

Absolutely routine in my circle (mostly senior level lawyers and finance wonks but a few senior civil servants too)

Hahaha - all those 'senior' roles are paid far more than a regular teacher, so not comparable at all!

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:10

EwwPeople · 18/04/2026 19:06

Not every teacher will do that either though.

Most teachers have marking or prep to do at home.

ainsleysanob · 18/04/2026 19:10

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 18/04/2026 18:47

Of course I do!

There are so many incredible, hardworking women in a range of roles who work evenings and weekends on top of a usual working day. I appreciate carers, nurses and all sorts of women in industry/ business.

Sadly, I think your cousins prove the point; they probably both knew the answer to attending the wedding would be ‘no’ from their respective schools, so they had to be dishonest and pull a sicky. This is the reality of an inflexible job.

But my job is inflexible too. I have to decide what’s important in my child’s life and book leave for. It can more often than not be a ‘no’!

For example, I work in the building maintenance industry. We do planned and reactive building work and maintenance for 3 major supermarkets and 4 local academy trusts. When are the busiest times for supermarkets? Christmas and Easter - do you think we can book time off? Nope. Schools - when do schools plan their building maintenance? In school holidays. Do you think we can book chunks of time off during school holidays?! Nope. We work evenings and weekends and often, due to the reactive nature of these customers (you’d be shocked how crap supermarket roofs are and how flimsy the flip flap doors are!) we can’t just ‘be flexible!

We were on the list of key workers during the pandemic but you don’t hear about the people who were making the only places people could go to, safe!

I don’t think anyone is disputing teachers work hard. But no harder, or less able to be flexible than so many of us! Life’s difficult, it’s been difficult for centuries!

It’s funny because I’m currently reading ‘Black Diamonds’, amongst other things it talks about the lives of men, women and children in mining villages across South Yorkshire in the 19th and early 20th centuries. The majority of those women didn’t ‘work’ in paid employment and still, on balance, had it much harder than us! What my point is, working women, work hard, teachers no harder or no less.

ruethewhirl · 18/04/2026 19:11

NobodysChildNow · 18/04/2026 18:34

@katmarie however as the lady in the article points out, she does have the holidays to mostly rest.

I work as a finance manager and earn a similar salary to a well-qualified teacher. I wfh most of the time but often I have to be online in the late evening for calls with our US parent company, or to finish the month end reporting.

My dh has a job where he is in a different city on each of 4 days of the week, and one day he is wfh .

My days are similar to the school teacher except we usually get up at 6.30 except on days going to the gym - then I get up at 5.20 so I’m home by 7am.

My dh helps with school run drop-offs three or four days a week, so he typically works 9.30 to 18.30, or 10am to 7pm. He also has to do client socialising typically once a month so quite often I don’t see him til 8pm or later.

As a result my youngest doesn’t have to go to breakfast club. Dh or I does reading and spelling and tables with ds2 from 7.30am to 8am, then if Dh needs to rush to work I do half an hour at my desk while ds plays before school run .

My oldest dc at secondary looks after themselves largely and doesn’t need my input until late evening.

I don’t find this anything unusual in this work pattern. It is relentless though.

I don’t get six weeks off in the summer, or two weeks at Christmas and Easter.

Neither do teachers.

boundarysponge · 18/04/2026 19:12

You’ve summeyup what I was trying to say very well

OP posts:
boundarysponge · 18/04/2026 19:12

That was to ainsley

OP posts:
newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:14

TheGreatDownandOut · 18/04/2026 19:07

I have always wondered how nurses cope tbh. Especially female ones.

It can also be tough, but there is much more flexibility in shift patterns - I know nurses who do three long shifts, nights, specific days etc.

However they have holiday childcare issues and sometimes not enough sleep!!

boundarysponge · 18/04/2026 19:17

Childcare is really challenging for nurses and other NHS staff due to the shift patterns. Also slots of requests to cover extra shifts at short notice due to staff shortages

OP posts:
StillAGoth · 18/04/2026 19:19

What always raises an eyebrow in my house is that MN and other places are full of parents criticising the education system - not enough staff; not enough resources; chronically under funded; children's needs not being met; curriculum unfit for purpose; too much focus on the wrong things; ridiculous expectations; children experiencing cognitive overload from an overstuffed curriculum; teachers' time being taken up by non teaching tasks such as supporting vulnerable families in a wider context and fulfilling parenting roles... There is almost universal agreement that currently, the education system is failing in its current form.

Until teachers describe what it's like working within that same failing system when there's seemingly no problem at all and were just all a bit crap.

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:19

ainsleysanob · 18/04/2026 19:10

But my job is inflexible too. I have to decide what’s important in my child’s life and book leave for. It can more often than not be a ‘no’!

For example, I work in the building maintenance industry. We do planned and reactive building work and maintenance for 3 major supermarkets and 4 local academy trusts. When are the busiest times for supermarkets? Christmas and Easter - do you think we can book time off? Nope. Schools - when do schools plan their building maintenance? In school holidays. Do you think we can book chunks of time off during school holidays?! Nope. We work evenings and weekends and often, due to the reactive nature of these customers (you’d be shocked how crap supermarket roofs are and how flimsy the flip flap doors are!) we can’t just ‘be flexible!

We were on the list of key workers during the pandemic but you don’t hear about the people who were making the only places people could go to, safe!

I don’t think anyone is disputing teachers work hard. But no harder, or less able to be flexible than so many of us! Life’s difficult, it’s been difficult for centuries!

It’s funny because I’m currently reading ‘Black Diamonds’, amongst other things it talks about the lives of men, women and children in mining villages across South Yorkshire in the 19th and early 20th centuries. The majority of those women didn’t ‘work’ in paid employment and still, on balance, had it much harder than us! What my point is, working women, work hard, teachers no harder or no less.

The article doesn't say she works harder - those who interpret it that way have a skewed reading.

If anyone is struggling to juggle, the response should really be solidarity, not 'my life is crap too so let's all just put up with it'.

Weeklyreport · 18/04/2026 19:19

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 18/04/2026 18:30

But for the vast majority their work stops when they leave work. The evening and weekend workload is significant as a teacher.

Yeah, that's not even close to true. Why do teachers think they are the only ones to do work evenings and weekends? I've worked in accountancy type roles, worked with auditors, worked with lawyers, worked with comms teams. All these people working above the 40 hours they are paid for, working evenings and weekends and some even on their holidays (of which they only get 4 to 6 weeks a year).

AllTheChaos · 18/04/2026 19:22

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:09

Hahaha - all those 'senior' roles are paid far more than a regular teacher, so not comparable at all!

Not going to disagree! Basically you get paid double but work double the hours - and spend the extra money on help because you have no time or energy left! (I am feeling v cynical today!)

ainsleysanob · 18/04/2026 19:23

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:19

The article doesn't say she works harder - those who interpret it that way have a skewed reading.

If anyone is struggling to juggle, the response should really be solidarity, not 'my life is crap too so let's all just put up with it'.

I was responding to a PP, not to the woman in the article! And my life is far from crap!

EwwPeople · 18/04/2026 19:23

newornotnew · 18/04/2026 19:10

Most teachers have marking or prep to do at home.

Not necessarily, particularly in primary. Arguments like no one else does x and all/most teachers do , aren’t helping anyone.

I’ll be honest, this woman is doing a disservice to teachers . There are plenty of things to complain about and raise awareness of when it comes to teaching. I’m a working mum with a shitty husband isn’t one of them.

MyLimeGuide · 18/04/2026 19:24

Im a teacher, currently marking yr11 coursework... however this is only once a year, I bring back marking maybe once a term, spend the odd hour or so throughout the week planning, summer term is easy peasy, its not as bad as a lot of teachers make out and we get paid pretty well IMO

dizzydizzydizzy · 18/04/2026 19:24

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 18/04/2026 18:28

Teacher here. I’m working 60 hours a week. Also looking after 3DC. It’s simply not the same as a ‘normal job’.

Lots of people assume that you have all the holidays off. You really don’t. Over the Easter break I worked most days and only took 4 days off.

There’s a crisis in recruitment and retention right now. If anyone out there thinks this sounds easy, go ahead and apply!

Also, there is zero flexibility. I’ve missed funerals, weddings and sports days. You can’t take days off.

DM was a full teacher in the 1980s. She worked every evening and weekend and a lot in the holidays too. She eventually packed it in and did something else. She stopped being bad tempered and ill (constant colds and flu) when she gave up teaching. Ir’s an incredibly hard job. I always swore I’d never be a teacher and interestingly, the DCs of 2 of my friends who are teachers say the same.

boundarysponge · 18/04/2026 19:25

I think it’s interesting how people interpret the point I was trying to make. Perhaps I was not clear. I’m not having a go at teachers. I’m saying it’s not unique to teaching. Being a working mother is hard. We all work hard. I feel solidarity with all of you. Our situation merits a better article I think….and I’ll leave it at that

OP posts: