Is it normal for primary schools to expect so many payments?

[ThisRealFawn]

I have twins in Yr 5 in Primary School and recently (in the past 2 years) there are just so many things to pay for. I appreciate that the school are taking the children out to do things but it’s all at a cost to the parents that we just cannot afford easily in these pricy times. This is a state school. Not private btw.

last term we paid for:

music lessons x2 = £130
forest school x2 = £40 (plus £100 ish worth of weather appropriate clothing)
residential x2 = £300 (plus all the stuff they needed)
costumes for school play = £40 ish

so like £700 ish

this upcoming term already we have paid

music lessons x2 = £130
weekly ice skating x2 = £130
Sherwood forest trip x2 = £60

so another £300+ already before the term has even started

Is this normal? How are people affording this. Like I said - I’m glad for the children they get to do this stuff but I don’t like the assumption that everybody will just happily keep paying for whatever the school decide to arrange.

if you’re entitled to school meals I think you get it all paid for but we don’t qualify even though we aren’t high earners.

we haven’t done anything really over the Easter hols because I literally have had £100 left to last me 2 weeks. Could have done with that £300 I’ve just had to pay really 😂

Is this normal now for primary schools or is our school unusual for this?

Two of those are not compulsory, nor expected. No one expects you to pay for music lessons, and the costumes could definitely have been sourced cheaper than £40.

Trips are just par for the course in primary, it gets easier in secondary when there’s far less trips but they’re also optional add ons for a select few children who are interested in that subject. The trips abroad are incredibly exclusive and barely anyone can justify that cost.

Norm for us was that we had to pay for music lessons, but they were optional.

There was one paid for trip a year (replaced by residential in Year 4 and Year 6).

We were asked to make a small contribution (and it was small, £1-2) for things like visiting drama groups and sport instructors. These were occasional one offs.

OP's school sounds OTT. I'm going to guess she is in an affluent area, and most parents chose the school because they love how many opportunities it offers.

Your children don't need to do all of these things if you can't afford them. Plenty of students opt to skip the residentials, which are probably already subsidised.

Music lessons would cost a lot more if the teacher came to your home.

Schools can barely afford to keep or pay their staff.

I had twins who had a residential in primary. They had a fund for people struggling to pay. I only had to pay for one child the school paid for the other.

The music lessons I’m ok with because I think it’s worthwhile. The ice skating - I know they don’t have to go but it’s crap if everyone else is going and they have to stay behind at school. They were so excited when they were told about it that it seems unfair to decide they’re the only ones who can’t do it

Obviously having two at the same time is always going to cost twice as much but surely your dcs needed outdoor clothes anyway, ie coats, waterproof leggings and wellies or walking boots.They are just regular expense of having dcs.

You could always say no. My dc didn't have music lessons. He had two residential trips, years 5 & 6, paid for transport for six swimming lessons, art gallery & museum trips and an annual visit to the pantomime. Costumes for the school play were definitely home made. I made an entire ARP warden uniform including the hat, using old clothes, navy shoe polish and some repurposed curtain braid. 😁

His primary school had a PTA that fund-raised constantly as well, so we were expected to make cakes and join in things like wreath making, at a cost, to pay for playground equipment.

As others say, the music lessons must be optional. Yes, music lessons (which all my DC had in primary school) cost money. If they are in school then sometimes the school invoices you. My two younger DC continued lessons at secondary but had them outside school. I still had to pay, obvs.

ETA: I see you have a friend whose DC has music lessons for free – that is not common and usually IME is related to a funded programme aiming to introduce DC to music – often in an demographic which might not be able to afford lessons.

The ice skating must also surely be an optional activity.

I wonder if it seems a lot bc you have twins so everything is doubled. I mean you are used to that I am sure.

Residential is a nice thing to do if you have the ££; I agree tho it's poor that you were charged for the play costumes; we were usually asked to provide them which meant some would just buy online but also gave the opportunity for anyone handy to make something (or pass on – we had a sheep outfit that did many a nativity!).

If the forest school, ice skating and music lessons are part of the curriculum and the whole class is participating during school time then the costs are outrageous and definitely not the norm.

We might have to pay the odd £ here or there for activities after school or for a trip or for comic relief/children in need but not much else. There are music lessons but only a few get picked.

Can't see how you spent so much on forest school clothing. Its a waterproof jacket and wellies, which most children would already have. And waterproof trousers which can get for £5 each from a supermarket

Is the forest school a club or part of their day? Same for the music lessons - is it something like rocksteady?

I expect to contribute towards trips, children love them and schools can't afford to fully fund.

Ice skating does seem a strange choice though, is it compulsory?
We had to pay towards the coach for the year 2 and year 4 swim lessons, but at £25 for 6 lessons, it's still much cheaper than the lessons cost outside school.

You have 3 options

• pay up
• don't pay extras if you don't want them
• get fully involved with the PTA fundraising and suggest that some is directed to the cost of school trips - our PTA covers all school trip coaches so parents just have to cover the entrance fee

Do they go to a private school?

Our primary school is very conscious of cost to parents. They provide costumes for plays etc (the kids make them) and the most we need to provide is only ever something people would have anyway e.g. a pair of black trousers or joggers, or a brightly coloured top or whatever. There's a school trip every term but never more than £10 (the last one was less than 3 quid). I think the most expensive outlay so far has been swimming lessons which were about £15 for the term (at the local pool).

They also do things like uniform swaps, second hand coat sales (£1 each) and seasonal stuff like Christmas jumper sales (50p each). Obviously reliant on donations but always have plenty.

We are in an affluent area in the SE and these costs seem high. Why is forest school so expensive, are they going off site?

My twins are in Y1 and there are constant requests for money either from the school or PTA. I would guesstimate we’ve spent £50 per child since Sept. Forest school is free, we got new coats and wellies. £8 each for a history visit, £15 each to visit London aquarium, tennis lessons are free in the summer term and they take the train (free) rather than coaches for trips.

Forest school is free. They need to wear waterproof coat , gloves wellies. All things I assume most kids have anyway

we had to pay for swimming around. £15 a session/week which was mainly due to coach taking to pool

basic music lessons free in school - all given a free recorder to take home

extra music lesson costs if want them

school trip to a National trust to Tudors / think was £28 including entrance and coach but a once a year cost

then the big year 5 - one night and £160 an 6 trip which is 4 nights away and went to say around £600

school plays - school has a costume hire for £2 but also say if can’t find /but to speak to school. They don’t expect Amazon costs of £20 per child

obv your costs are double as twins

I had to miss out on school activities because my parents couldn't afford them. It didn't kill me. I was often the only one not going on whole class trips.
If you don't want to pay, then don't! It's your choice. But don't choose to pay and then moan about it.
Who is paying for your friends music lessons round the corner?

The primary school my dd went to didn't have fancy white boards or lots of TA's, but did pay for Judo sessions, trips into town/local farm, and an amazing go-cart building and racing event. Everything is a choice. Don't moan about your own choices.

No we live in Nottingham City about a mile from the centre. Not an affluent area. Forest school is at a scout place offsite. We had a very specific kit list for it because it was in winter. Lots of things needed, particularly snow boots rather than wellies and thermal layers.

Not in an affluent area at all. We live in Nottingham about a mile from the centre. It is an ofsted outstanding school though so I’m not sure if that makes a difference?

Nope definitely not normal for any of my local schools. Most seem mindful parents have limited resources and often more than 1 child.

P7 residential trip is normal (costs anywhere between £250 and £350) depending on the school. Obviously clothes have to be provided. Music and Art most good parent's council fund them. We get the odd dress down day which is £1 per child donation and pay for a pantomime yearly (£15) which is a bargain as the ticket price is £35 for non school events.

High school is gonna be a shocker @ThisRealFawn!

I’ve got one who went on a French trip last year, then changed languages and is going on a Spanish trip next year!
One going to Austria with the county music service. Also a number of trips for talented musicians - Royal Albert Hall, Royal Northern College Music. DS also went to Spain a couple of years ago.
Outdoor activity residentials for both that was Y7 or 8.
Even GCSE History squeezed in a long week end in London.
Umpteen theatre /concert trips & coaches for GCSE Music & English Lit!

None are compulsory but, as you say, you wouldn’t want your child to miss out.

OP I would be raising this with the school. It seems like they are expecting those on mid to higher level incomes to pay a lot but those people (particularly mid income families) have little left as they get no help.

Not sure she chose twins.

This. OP, prepare yourself for senior school because it is far more expensive.

I've paid for DS to go on a GCSE German exchange trip (and then you have to host his exchange partner for a week), a GCSE Biology field tri and GCSE Geography field trip, and a £550 ski trip. Then add in revision guides, text books, sports equipment (tennis raquet, hockey stick) and leasing a laptop. If you want them to have an equal chance of good grades they aren't really optional.
I scrapped our family holiday for 4 years.

I am intrigued about £100 of forest school
clothes. For my twins’ private school, I got them used wellies, about £1-£2 each and Temu padded jackets that I actually got for free because I ordered a couple of sizes, wanted to return one size and the Temu system said you can keep them all, here’s the full refund (???!!! £5-6 otherwise).

One thing we did when our DC left their local state primary school, because DH was shocked avout the individual cost of 1:1 music lessons and cost/hire of the instruments, was to fund lessons/instrument hire for three children each year who had aptitude but whose parents didn't have funds or wouldn't pay. Some years there have been fewer than three, other years more and it has balanced out and occasionally DH has funded a bit more.

DH did this because he was the poor bugger who didn't get lessons due to his parents being tight bastards and despite his father playing the organ. Because, of course, his father could teach him, but didn't and DH recalls being left out. Similarly trip letters stayed in his pockets because he knew what the answer would be.

In response to @ThisRealFawn I guess it feels bad because you have a double whammy with twins. I don't understand the forest school and ice skating. Also, I think if costumes are expensive and specific, there could be PTA involvement

Snow boots are also cheap used - on Vinted or Fb marketplace. Or new in Lidl/Aldi/Temu/Shein. Thermal layers in Decathlon. Now on sale I think! (Actually I’ll go check out Decathlon sale while we’re at it)

we got a specific list for forest school. It was in January and February so they needed thermal base layers, waterproof trousers and coats hats, waterproof gloves and snow boots. I got it all on Vinted. It would have cost loads more new!
the costumes they needed camouflage army gear and soldier helmets - again- Vinted but still adds up!