Social media has ruined my concentration and changed my personality.

[ADHD89]

To think that social media, Instagram, Tiktok, YouTube, Facebook ,Mumsnet , Reddit , Chatgpt, etc have totally ruined my concentration span and now make reading/concentrating on a book or a movie really unappealing and uninteresting ?
I am much more interested in watching 2 minute reels, then reading through comments, and basically finding out about all sorts of topics and going down rabbit holes etc. I also enjoy reading dilemmas on Facebook groups and on mumsnet and seeing what people say. I also use Chatgpt alot as like a regular counsellor.
It makes me sad as I used to be such a book lover when I was younger and I watched about 4 or 5 movies at the weekend when I was younger..its like I've completely changed involuntarily.
Anyone else feel the same?

Same. It’s affected my ability to concentrate at work too. Depressing.

The first part, the phone off and picking up the book, will be hard. But move past that, get into the first few pages and it will be easier.

Yes. It’s awful. I’ve just started using the brick app. It basically blocks apps for a chosen space of time. I now feel bored so often but I’m hoping my brain will retrain to fill those spaces with useful tasks.

100%, although I find I can read now but the rest of the time I’m reaching for my phone. The other day I had to leave it somewhere for a few hours and it was like I was lost without it. I’ve tried the blocking apps but it doesn’t help

I don’t post often but wanted to recommend a book (ironic I know)
Stolen focus.
it is science backed and basically explains whats happening to you and why And how to fix it.

there was that recent court case where Meta and YouTube lost against a young woman because social media was addictive and made her depressed.

there’s a range of studies that have been conducted about short form video and what it is doing to our brains.

sometimes I think being armed with knowledge makes it easier to cut down your use.

some people go to “dumb phones,” the sales have increased in recent years.
“the family computer” is also making a big return.
You can grey scale your phone, this makes it more unappealing.

screen use (especially small screen) has been compared to cigarettes.

just wanted to post to say it’s not your fault and it is fixable :)

All the hand wringing by adults about teens and phones is so hypocritical- they are just preparing for a life of gazing at their phone like most adults !

It’s actually quite pathetic being so addicted like a 14 year old. I put mine on airplane. I think history will judge our phone addiction.

Helpful thread. Might be worth treating this as if your brain is reacting because it is being overstimulated for whatever reason. It could be telling you it needs a break. You could try resetting have to kind of recovery gentle phase for a few weeks and see if that helps.

Since Covid and into peri ,I have had serious issues getting to sleep despite being physically exhausted by the evening but my brain will still be so so wired. I need the novelty of dopamine to get to sleep so will seek out MN or the online news or asking wish of chat GPT if there’s something I am worried about and have to consciously put screen down and play podcasts or the radio to myself to get to sleep. I can’t overstress how much the idea of lying quietly without a screen feels impossible to me at this point when the flat is quiet around me and the DC are sleep.

It’s possible that for some of you it’s overstimulation that your tired brain (due to Covid damage for eg) which it is still in recovery with, is still too frazzled to handle. Paraphrasing this from LC podcasts. But I don’t see why this couldn’t be applicable to in general just overstrsesed brain for any reason.

Therr is no way I have energy or concentration to read a book or a full page in one sitting. No way can I open IG fot example I would lose hours without even knowing it. So MN and BBC news website are all I allow myself. Hence the rifling through at night to try to find something new and engaging. Hope this helps someone. The good news is healing eventually comes our brains are very plastic but they do need a proper rest and a break to recover. So ration what you look at like PPs are saying. See if you can in addition overall try to prioritise and ration out your energy a bit and not overdo things, including exercise and stress, and try to start to have a daily routine including very gentle exercise and good sleep. Easier said than done I know but this is broadly the LC research advises and there could be learning to be taken from that. (Easily googled for yourself if you want to look into it properly but that’s the gist)

Also read Careless People by Sarah Winn Williams the Facebook whistleblower. They are playing us like fiddles. Put me right off. No more reels or fucking Facebook for me after the dirty truth is revealed.

On my computer! I still use the Internet but it feels so different using it on a laptop in fixed place, then shutting it. I think it's portable Internet that's the problem, always distracting you during other activities. Using the Internet for specific reasons is fine.

Realised a while ago that this would be a consequence so I deleted all but Insta where I vaguely keep up with family/ friends and starting listening to audiobooks and using the library to get books out to read.
It can be done! You still know all the trends or memes or whatever because they seep out into the real world, news, from friends…
Highly recommend it!

just to add that surely hsitory will judge.. the people who engineer in the addiction. I wouldn’t judge anyone personally who has been exposed and got addicted. That’s the whole business model. I wouldn’t stand a chance if I was watching short videos.

for eg this holidays I learnt that my DC like online quizzes on YouTube. They watched one up on the tv the other day instead on in their phones. The gabbling voice was fixed to be on at least 2 x normal speed the colours were screamingly bright, the quiz itself has a loud ticking timer for each question to add stress to it. It’s like an attention trap. Awful. So cynical of the makers to aim those tricks at kids.

Same especially since tiktok i have no attention span anymore

Why not start an atomic habit. Just read 1 page of your book each day and make a deal with yourself that you'll just read the page, put the book down and then read some MN.

It would take about a minute to do that, then pick the book up the next day and do the same. After a while it will be a habit. Trouble is, people are too ambitious and think they must read a whole chapter, or read for an hour but you really don't.

I looked into Brick and instead do the same thing with Foqos app and a cheap NFC from Amazon. Cost about £5 rather than £50+. My phone is locked down a lot - automatically while I’m at work and from 9pm-8am. Any time I’m with my kids I lock it as I don’t want them to see me constantly on my phone as “normal”. You can chose what is available when locked down; I have anything I consider a tool available most of the time (weather, timer, ocado, meditation app, and actually WhatsApp and email) but no browser or news app.

It’s changed my life. Improved my sleep. I do more creative hobbies. Read a lot more. Feel tons more content.

off to lock my phone again now!

Yes I have also been thinking of this. All my (adult) family seem to be the same. I saw a programme on ‘digital dementia’ last week which has been a big wake up call.

I tried listing all the apps / programs I need to use (eg banking app, facebook for sports club) and limit my use to just these cases, but here I am on mumsnet….

It's a muscle. You use it or lose it. Good news is, you're in control and you can start working it again!

I never had Facebook ( and still have no " friends" on it) but it was increasingly difficult to get information about local events/ shop opening times etc without having an account. Of course that doesn't explain why when I'm doing a " quick check" I can easily spend half an hour looking at dogs I won't adopt/ recipes I won't try/ fashion I don't like/ events I won't go to.
It's the same when I use my phone to check my bank account/ put on heating/ look at minutecast weather forecast/ check doorbell camera...each of these is 2 mins or less but one thing leads to another as they say....
I took am finding watching a TV programme needs to be done alongside scrolling so that I'm paying attention to neither. I'm going to get it under control though...

Yes, same here. I downloaded ’How to break up with your phone’ on Audible last week (but haven’t yet started it, unsurprisingly).

Until the past few years I’d always been an avid reader, meditator etc. Loved getting lost in a book and have so many waiting to be read but can’t seem to ‘settle’ these days. I feel angsty and as though there is something else I ought to be doing when I do read or meditate.

And I’m not even a regular poster, much more of a lurker on forums and never post on social media. Being a passive consumer feels even more of a waste of hours somehow.

Link

BBC radio 4 recently discussed this very topic in a four part series.

I was an avid reader until I had kids and then I really struggled to immerse myself in a book. There was no SM then so that wasn't the reason. I kinda think turning to SM might not be the cause it could be a replacement activity rather than a cause. For me I became hyper critical of the book I was trying to read. A little voice on my head would say - well that's ridiculous - or similar. I find now I can read a book but it has to be excellent (in my view) and thought provoking. I can still enjoy a good film or TV series.

I think the reels are a distraction from perhaps boredom? There is definitely a dopamine hit. I have chronic pain and so sometimes will turn to nonsense reels to distract.

I don't see MN in the same way as some threads are like long form novels.

Like so many things it is the why are you doing it. There may be biological reasons why we become addicted to things e.g..dopamine or there may be psychological things that push us towards addiction.

The most dangerous aspect I think are the medical influencers. Some are fine and try to debunk stuff but there are loads that push for this or that. The longevity doctors are the worst.

I've deleted all of my social media and news apps. Was a great decision. Scrolling is designed to be very addictive.

yes me too. My downfall is TikTok. I’m can dip in and out,take or leave insta and facebook…even this site…..but I watch TikTok like it’s the TV. And tbh I don’t watch any TV anymore. I used to enjoy reading but I just can’t get into it anymore.I feel my attention span has gone, I struggle to sit through a film, if my husband and I watch a series on Netflix or whatever, I can just about manage one episode, I’m horrified if he suggests watching the next one. I find I pick up my phone as soon as that one episode finishes.

A few years ago I managed to form the new habit of putting my phone down/away at 8pm. I’m trying to go back to that. I’m trying to find things to watch. Years ago I used to watch all the soaps, I used to love all the house programs, even cooking stuff. I would have told you years ago that TV was my favourite way of unwinding. I’m trying to go back to that. Some will say the TV is no good for you either but imo it’s better than TikTok.

What do people think about listening to podcasts and audiobooks whilst doing other things? I have managed to cut down on social media but this has been largely replaced by the above. Now I am wondering how important it is to our brains to switch off and just live with our thoughts rather than listening to something constantly. My sleep has not been great and I am wondering if I need to break my addiction to them too.

I teach English Lit/American Studies in a Russell group uni. There’s a noticeable shift in some modules towards film/TV adaptations/music even rather than books. I have nothing against this as such, I think these are forms of literature in ways so I get it. Some colleagues have stopped setting longer texts all together e.g one used to set Moby Dick but had to stop because no one read it (I think this was a good decision anyway, Moby Dick sucks…)

My modules tend to be a combination of shorter books, long-ish poems and then I’ll generally set one slightly longer but never Ulysses level! I make sure the texts are diverse so won’t purely set dead white males. Some books go down better than others with students generally. They tend to be big fans of Giovanni’s Room as an example.

My students still read, basically. Booktok has been great for this. I’m also happy that the old paperback never died, people still prefer physical copies to e-books. Some will listen rather than read and that’s fine by me, audiobooks are great and I listen to them sometimes too.

I don’t use social media anymore other than LinkedIn. I struggle to watch films in one sitting, especially if they’re long. I’m not really into films in truth though, I wouldn’t own a TV at all if I didn’t have kids.

How selfish! Take them back, there may be other people who actually will read them, and they can’t if you’re hogging them and can’t be bothered to take them back because you’re too busy playing on TikTok.