Child given money by "Vicar" at school

[TakeALookAtTheseSwatches]

So my 10 year old daughter (year 5) came home from school on Thursday and told us the Vicar (possibly just a trainee, I'm not entirely sure) who was taking their collective worship at school gave her £5 to "get herself an Easter treat" and that it was "just between me and you" I asked her if she told the teacher and she said no. I feel quite uneasy about this, should I say something to the school?

Not everyone on Mumsnet is in England or Wales. Most schools in Scotland finished yesterday. She has since clarified that she is indeed in England though.

I find this quite sinister tbh. As soon as school reopens report. Thank goodness your DD told you.

Do you know where the vicar came from? You could try raising this with the Diocese.

Hi TakeALookAtTheseSwatches

I just wanted to echo what others have said, this is a s breach of professional boundaries. The fact that the individual has told your daughter not to tell anyone would suggest that they know they shouldn’t be doing this.

Take a note of what your daughter has told you and email the school designated safeguarding lead or head (likelihood is someone will be checking emails). I would also contact your local LADO (they are responsible for managing concerns about professionals). I see you said you were in County Durham so this should have the number to contact https://durham-scp.org.uk/practitioners/allegations-against-staff-or-volunteers-lado/ you may also be able to contact the safeguarding lead for the parish/church if you check the website.

Even if there was nothing untoward in there actions this needs picking up immediately

Quoted wrong poster

🙄🙄🙄

Police NOW!

I'd have thought that sort of charitable giving would have been done through the school officially. Schools must have a good idea of which families are on a tight budget.

Giving it directly to the child is weird.

I would report to the school. The only time I’ve raised a safeguarding concern, they acted very quickly and updated me within a few hours. Now obviously you’re in the holidays but I suspect the Head will still be keeping an eye and this is the sort of thing that would be picked up.

There are multiple possibilities but even if it’s the ‘kindly but misguided’ type they need extra training and shouldn’t be having that sort of access to the kids. I do have my own suspicions that my own school does not supervise the content of some of the church led sessions quite as closely as they should be and things can be said and done in the name of religion that other groups coming into school wouldn’t be doing.

Not now they won’t, not with the spotlight they are under due to historic child abuse

I am slightly reluctant to go straight to the police with this as there is always the chance she's not being totally honest or has got her wires crossed somewhere along the line. I don't want to start a witch hunt against this person without checking out the facts first. I think I'd rather have a conversation with the school first, just annoying that it's Easter. I will email the head though in case they are monitoring their email over the holidays.

I teach in a primary school. I would lose my job if I did this.

Oh no, but how can they faux-naively cast aspersions on OP now then? That’s quite inconvenient.

That's interesting.

I assumed that it was a C of E School and that's what happens in my area.

I wasn't aware that Priests/Pastors/Ministers from other denominations apart from C of E could lead Collective Worship in C of E schools ?.

If that is the case then this guy could be one of any of a number of people, but the school should have a record of who was there on that day and that should narrow it down.

In that case the school should be the first port of call.

Yes most of Scotland stopped Thursday but Scotland generally don't have vicars go into schools, Ministers and Priests Yes, Vicars No

If a Vicar did this, he'd lose his job too. They have a lot of safeguarding training now. They know what to do.

Couldn't tell you tbh. My kids school never have anyone religious visit nor do they go to church and I can't remember what we called the head of the church next door when we were at school. I'm sure I've heard people refer to them as vicars in Scotland but maybe not.

She's in County Durham. Tbe schools finished on Fri 27th, but maybe it's a private school or running a different term for some reason.

Why not?

Trying to give the benefit of the doubt, if your daughter was sitting next to the vicar, I wonder if she ended up in some kind of object lesson involving a £5 note and got to keep it at the end? I used to be involved in church work and this kind of scenario was quite common.

I agree.
I don't think we're getting the whole story here.
That doesn't mean that I think the child is at fault BTW

Always one.....please get with the times and realise that adults are not all innocent and do abuse children.
Seriously, I hope you would not give your child that disbelieving response.
This is how people get away with SA.

Whaaat?

I've never heard of such a thing. What church/denomination were you involved with ?

They don’t all as I was with a colleague this week and she told her their schools last day was thursday. Either way, why does this matter - is everyone trying to suggest Op is lying?

Don't wait until school opens.
Also contact the Diocese and report the vicar tomorrow.