Child given money by "Vicar" at school

[TakeALookAtTheseSwatches]

So my 10 year old daughter (year 5) came home from school on Thursday and told us the Vicar (possibly just a trainee, I'm not entirely sure) who was taking their collective worship at school gave her £5 to "get herself an Easter treat" and that it was "just between me and you" I asked her if she told the teacher and she said no. I feel quite uneasy about this, should I say something to the school?

how worrying op, I hope you get to the bottom of this

Yes you can. Do not wait. Email the headteacher and copy in the chair of governors unless that's the priest. Safeguarding issues can be reported anytime. Lots more families than usual will be going to church tomorrow, its typically a child friendly event, often wth priests giving eggs to children.

Unless it was a competition prize, this is extremely concerning. You must report it to the Safeguarding Lead at the School.

Send a formal complaint to school, church and police, asking for full disclosure of the steps they take to deal with this man. Let them all know that your complaint has been copied to the others, and that if you are not satisfied with their reactions, you will take it further, to discourage them from sweeping it under the carpet.
Praise child some more.

I think I understand.

You prefaced your post with "if this is real" so that we know you think the OP might be making up shit and you are not easily taken in, unlike the rest of us gullible dupes.

That is helpful but it also needs to be reported to police and Social Services safeguarding/child protection.

Diocesan Safeguarding Advisor escalate matters to police but also deal with things within the church so you cover all bases this way. They absolutely do not give clergy time to get their story straight as previously suggested by another poster.

OP it's really bad and I'm shocked people, as evil as they are, still feel free to do that stuff without fear of immediately running their lives
Who in the world gives a child money and then tells them it's a secret? In school? The kind boggles.

You said that requiring the DBS was "bonkers bureaucracy"

I did not say that at all.

Please read the copy of my response at 8.01 today, below -

"I would still maintain it's unnecessary bureaucracy - especially the part I mentioned about bell-ringing tutors having to have a separate DBS certificate for every church they taught in."

And as for a 'kneejerk reaction' - it came into being suddenly as this case was being investigated years ago

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lincolnshire-41348011

Why haven't you replied to any of the other points I made? Why did you say my priorities are skewed?

Have a good look at your posts that insult volunteers and you'll have your answer.

Might the vicar (do we know the gender?) have been speaking about Easter and your daughter mentioned she wasn't getting any eggs or something? Children say peculiar, innocent things at that age! I do agree that you should mention it to the school, asking them to throw some light on it. But please , try to stay calm at this stage. Your child is safe with you. Its a huge shame that it's the school holidays though. Have you mentioned it to any other parents? I really hope it's all an innocent event, and that you can breathe easy very soon ❤️

Report this. Big red flags thaf he gave ger money and told her to keep quiet about it.

Reading this just made my blood run cold.

As others have said, I'd definitely report it to the school, and also clarify exactly who this man was.

Well done to your dd for telling you.

Surely you can see that's not a knee jerk reaction? It was the final straw after generations of abuse cover-ups in churches.

I didn't insult volunteers at all! I said that if people were complaining about being "penalised" because they had to pay £50 for a DBS check, they need to take a long hard look at themselves. Which is true.

The parish church should also have a safeguarding officer, with contact details listed on their website. So if you google the church you should be able to make contact.

Who in the world gives a child money and then tells them it's a secret?

A sex pest.

Because they'd have to be an absolutely monumental idiot to think something like that is acceptable otherwise, and I wouldn't want someone that thick around kids either.

Obviously this needs to be reported, but if someone did that to a child in my family I'd be paying them a visit immediately rather than hearing their side of the story second or third hand.

Yes, straight to the police. Report it to school afterwards, and I'd report it to the Child Safeguarding Team at your local council. If you report it across tge board it's less likely to slip through the net if, indeed, there is something sinister happening.

Do people not actually realise what Maundy money is. It’s money given by the monarch to selected people. 🙄

"and that it was "just between me and you"

This is the bit that's inappropriate and a safeguarding flag.

Yes, I challenged that upthread, but some people said that they got money on Maundy Thursday, so maybe it's a tradition somewhere. I've never heard of it, though.

This needs to be a formal complaint to the school and if the person hasn't been dealt with escalate it. He is potentially grooming your child. This is incredibly serious. This could well be a test; if he thinks she has kept this secret, she is the ideal victim to abuse.

Even though it’s the school holidays, someone will be monitoring emails for CP/safeguarding concerns. Don’t wait a fortnight.

I speak to her outside of school at the end of the day or a phone call, never been given an email and the school website isn't much help.

The school website should list the DSL and how to contact them. Look under “Safeguarding” or “Who’s Who”. It really should be on the front page of any school website. Email them now. Someone from the SG team will monitor that Inbox throughout the holiday.

Anyone complaining about a DBS check needs to give their head a wobble.

We'd all like to live in a world where people wouldn't need one to volunteer at a church, but we don't.

@Daffodildahlia

These people are not employees, they are volunteers.

There's no charge for Standard, Enhanced, or Enhanced with Barred Lists DBS checks for volunteer positions.

If the organization you're volunteering for uses a 3rd party to process them, it's likely there will be an admin fee, but that's down to the organization.

But that's not the point. Anyone arguing against the DBS is picking the strangest hill to die on. It doesn't matter what people think of the bureaucracy or if they can't afford it, their desire to spend their free time with other people's kids doesn't trump a vital safety measure.

@TakeALookAtTheseSwatches if you PM me the name of the school, I will find the DSL and contact details for you.