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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Keeping a 3 bedroom council house when your children have grown up

1000 replies

Iwishitwerewarmer · 03/04/2026 07:41

Just pondering - what are everyone’s opinions on a single parent raising their children in a council house/housing association house and staying there once their children have moved out? Should they downsize into a one bed flat/smaller property or is it their right to remain in their home/neighbourhood?

Added extra - they have looked after the property well, have landscaped the garden, installed a new kitchen and generally added value to the property.

OP posts:
GaIadriel · 03/04/2026 15:17

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 15:07

Does it matter?
Why do we have to reduce people down to what they are contributing or not? People are worth more than that. And the people in low paid jobs are still doing something that needs doing.

I don't think anybody has the god given right to live in a three bedroom house on their own unless they're footing 100% of the bill. There was a thread by a lawyer a while back who had a nice council house and was earning absolutely loads. This isn't a person that needs subsidising.

x2boys · 03/04/2026 15:18

GaIadriel · 03/04/2026 15:02

I can only speak from my personal experience. One of my best mates is Polish. She was a self employed cleaner for years. Doing OK and sharing a house with a mate.

She then moved in with a well off guy who owned a gym and renovated houses in addition to having a decent day job. She lived rent/bill free for years and just did a few beauty treatments as a sideline.

After they split up she got a brand new place on the outskirts of a beautiful cotswold town nearby. Lovely looking place with different coloured bricks etc (looks modern and high quality) and surrounded by young professional families. She's just carried on working part time and would never go back to cleaning or anything like that.

Fair play to her but it's a bit frustrating that she has the choice of working part time and living in a nicer place than I do whilst I work bloody hard. She's on holiday in Portugal atm.

And speaking from my personal experience my social housing house is on the outskirts of Bolton ,the estates a bit of shit hole tbh
It is what it is and I have secure housing
But social housing tenants are not all living the dream in beautiful properties.

JackA · 03/04/2026 15:18

BackToLurk · 03/04/2026 15:11

In seems council house tenants can’t win. They’re either lazy benefit claimants leeching off ‘hard working taxpayer’ or the well-to-do who should have moved out years ago.

I am not critical of my neighbour, I understand why she hasn’t moved. But the reality is she is in a position to live in a smaller property and pay market rent. A lot of people aren’t and there sadly aren’t enough available properties to go round which is obviously a much bigger issue.

GaIadriel · 03/04/2026 15:19

x2boys · 03/04/2026 15:18

And speaking from my personal experience my social housing house is on the outskirts of Bolton ,the estates a bit of shit hole tbh
It is what it is and I have secure housing
But social housing tenants are not all living the dream in beautiful properties.

Which is why each case needs reviewed independently.

Seymour5 · 03/04/2026 15:20

MrsMcGarry · 03/04/2026 14:32

I'm very aware. But those in council or HA properties are also being subsidised by the lower rent they are being charged compared to an equivalent property on the private rented market. So people not in receipt of HB are benefitting as well

They aren't subsidised. Social landlords are non profit making, unlike private landlords. That is why the rents are lower. As explained earlier in the thread.

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 15:22

Seymour5 · 03/04/2026 15:20

They aren't subsidised. Social landlords are non profit making, unlike private landlords. That is why the rents are lower. As explained earlier in the thread.

Edited

No one ever listens to this though. You will be banging your head against a wall.

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:22

GaIadriel · 03/04/2026 15:17

I don't think anybody has the god given right to live in a three bedroom house on their own unless they're footing 100% of the bill. There was a thread by a lawyer a while back who had a nice council house and was earning absolutely loads. This isn't a person that needs subsidising.

But some people do need council housing. Or housing association housing. There is no way I could have afforded a mortgage on my wages when I moved into a council house. My mum was in the same position when she was eventually given a council house (that process wasn't easy). Single people living on their own don't always have the means to buy

There are always exceptions - that doesn't mean that some people aren't truly in need of council or social housing

BackToLurk · 03/04/2026 15:23

JackA · 03/04/2026 15:18

I am not critical of my neighbour, I understand why she hasn’t moved. But the reality is she is in a position to live in a smaller property and pay market rent. A lot of people aren’t and there sadly aren’t enough available properties to go round which is obviously a much bigger issue.

Edited

Maybe a problem is that we’ve lost sight of the idea of a property as anything other than an asset. This is your neighbour’s home. There may be many reasons why she may not want to leave it.

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:24

YouDriveMeCrazyButICanDoThatMyself · 03/04/2026 07:44

It’s their home. They shouldn’t be forced out into a one bedroom flat anymore than a private home owner should have to sell their 4 bed detached and move into a one bed to free up houses for new families.

It isn't their home, it belongs to The Local Council/HousingAuthority and the rent is subsidised by Poll Tax payers like me.

When we have needy families that deserve such accommodation, it is totally unfair that single people should sit pretty in a big house where they don't pay the market rent.

Seymour5 · 03/04/2026 15:24

x2boys · 03/04/2026 15:18

And speaking from my personal experience my social housing house is on the outskirts of Bolton ,the estates a bit of shit hole tbh
It is what it is and I have secure housing
But social housing tenants are not all living the dream in beautiful properties.

Absolutely not! The properties on the most desirable estates were the biggest sellers under Right to Buy, that has left tenants with little or no choice in some area. RTB no longer exists in Wales or Scotland. I wonder why our Labour government haven't withdrawn it in England?

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 15:25

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:24

It isn't their home, it belongs to The Local Council/HousingAuthority and the rent is subsidised by Poll Tax payers like me.

When we have needy families that deserve such accommodation, it is totally unfair that single people should sit pretty in a big house where they don't pay the market rent.

Poll Tax?

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:26

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:24

It isn't their home, it belongs to The Local Council/HousingAuthority and the rent is subsidised by Poll Tax payers like me.

When we have needy families that deserve such accommodation, it is totally unfair that single people should sit pretty in a big house where they don't pay the market rent.

You do know that council tenants in work pay council tax too - and where I live even people on UC pay a proportion of council tax

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:26

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 15:25

Poll Tax?

Community Charge then, plus a subsidy from central government also paid for by taxpayers like me.

MrsMcGarry · 03/04/2026 15:26

Mrspatmoresapprentice · 03/04/2026 14:42

If it’s not subsidised, what do Homes England do and what is the £27bn Social and Affordable Homes programme?
Personally I think we should be investing far more in social and affordable housing. Even if people currently want to downsize there is a significant shortage of anywhere to downsize to. It’s all well and good saying they “should” leave, but to where?
And the Government won’t raise social rents (well they do, but it is capped) because they’ll end up paying a lot of the increase via Housing Benefit anyway, whereas everyone pays Council Tax.

Well not totally.

If someone is renting and getting HB then govt funds this, but if someone is homeless and entitled to temp accommodation via their council the council has to fund this (usually paying inflated rents to private landlords or hotels because we haven't built enough social housing for years). Whilst govt will cover some of the cost of temp accommodation, it pays only 90 of the January 2011 Local Housing Allowance. So those families in temp accommodation are being subsidised directly via council tax.
(Which isn't their fault and we should not blame them for the costs, rather successive gifts who have not built enough social housing or enabled councils to do so)

BackToLurk · 03/04/2026 15:26

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:24

It isn't their home, it belongs to The Local Council/HousingAuthority and the rent is subsidised by Poll Tax payers like me.

When we have needy families that deserve such accommodation, it is totally unfair that single people should sit pretty in a big house where they don't pay the market rent.

Yes it’s their home.

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:27

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:26

You do know that council tenants in work pay council tax too - and where I live even people on UC pay a proportion of council tax

Yes but not the full whack.

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:27

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 15:25

Poll Tax?

There used to be a poll tax in Scotland and I believe England. Introduced by Thatcher. Scotland got it a year before England did

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:27

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:27

Yes but not the full whack.

I paid full council tax when I worked full time and lived in a council flat -why wouldn't I?

hazelberry · 03/04/2026 15:28

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:24

It isn't their home, it belongs to The Local Council/HousingAuthority and the rent is subsidised by Poll Tax payers like me.

When we have needy families that deserve such accommodation, it is totally unfair that single people should sit pretty in a big house where they don't pay the market rent.

Poll tax? Have we slipped back to the Thatcher years? Also SH tenants pay council tax too.

x2boys · 03/04/2026 15:28

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:24

It isn't their home, it belongs to The Local Council/HousingAuthority and the rent is subsidised by Poll Tax payers like me.

When we have needy families that deserve such accommodation, it is totally unfair that single people should sit pretty in a big house where they don't pay the market rent.

Poll tax 😂🤣
Im 52 and am too young to have paid poll tax
I hsve always paid council tax and I do so on on my socisl housing property.

Moonlightfrog · 03/04/2026 15:29

I am in a 3 bed HA house, my adult dc still live at home and likely will for a while. If/when they do move out I would probably down size if I can stay in the same area. The HA/Council here offer you a smaller property to encourage you to move but they can’t make you.

Locutus2000 · 03/04/2026 15:30

x2boys · 03/04/2026 15:18

And speaking from my personal experience my social housing house is on the outskirts of Bolton ,the estates a bit of shit hole tbh
It is what it is and I have secure housing
But social housing tenants are not all living the dream in beautiful properties.

Weird how the same people who like to typify social housing properties as palaces tend to have conniptions at the thought of living near them.

x2boys · 03/04/2026 15:30

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:27

There used to be a poll tax in Scotland and I believe England. Introduced by Thatcher. Scotland got it a year before England did

Yes very unpopular lots of riots which lead to the ultimate resignation of Margaret Thatcher

Iris2020 · 03/04/2026 15:30

ProudAmberTurtle · 03/04/2026 07:46

In a perfect world they would keep it but this is a country with rapid population growth at the moment.

Whatever you think of the asylum issue, in the cold light of day the taxpayer shouldn't be paying for one person to live in a three bed house when there might be, say, a group of 5 people who need a home and a one bed flat is the only thing available.

For better or worse we live in a world with lots of mobility, and that means we need to build many more homes.

This. We have to be pragmatic.
There is not enough stock for the government to sponsor lifelong accommodation.
It's not anyone's home - it's the building that someone / a family is temporarily allowed to staying based on their current circumstamces, with the caveat they have to move once the house is needed for other purposes / their circumstances change.

Noone is entitled to.a council house.

greengagejamandcrumpets · 03/04/2026 15:31

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 15:27

There used to be a poll tax in Scotland and I believe England. Introduced by Thatcher. Scotland got it a year before England did

The original Poll Tax was levied by the government to subsidise the Napoleonic Wars I believe.

No doubt a historian will correct me if I have this wrong 🙂

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