To think that people should be quiet in the quiet coach of the train?

[HighlandTERF]

I have autism. When traveling, I always pick the quiet coach to avoid getting overstimulated.

However, the quiet coach always seems to attract those that are performatively loud! Phone calls, music, and chit chat seem are drawn to it like a magnet! If you sit there and aren’t quiet, why are you there? There are seven other carriages where you can make as much noise as you like!

This is exactly why I try and avoid the quiet carriage - it annoys me too much when people ignore it; it’s better for me to sit in a non quiet carriage with noise cancelling headphones.

Being charitable, on trains where seats are reserved people sometimes just get seats assigned there. But otherwise, I think it’s just a lot of people are inconsiderate arseholes.

If you were assigned there though, and you wished to talk, why not move to another coach?

People should respect it, but they don't.

If you can, it's easier to lower expectations and not anticipate quiet.

Yep, but we currently have a culture of complete lack of consideration towards others, and total disregardment of rules where possible in favour of the 'what I want is what matters' mentality. Many people are selfish arseholes.

It is not the silent carriage. People can talk in them if they are considerate.

The risk of not being able to find a seat / seats elsewhere?

Ideally people would only get put in the quiet coach on request, or at least be able to specify that they didn’t want it.

And they should also be able to select a noisy coach which would be the only place on the train where it was ok to have phone noise without headphones.

Then anyone whose phone was being noisy anywhere else on the train could get kicked off at the next station.

Yes but you keep your voice down. You don't just blather on, in earshot of others as if you are in a cafe or bar!

If you can, it's easier to lower expectations and not anticipate quiet.

And this is why as a society we're failing at the moment.

The boorish minority are growing, and visibly ignoring anything that looks like a "rule" if it won't be enforced.

As a result, those who are weak-minded just say "join them, or stop complaining"

YANBU @HighlandTERF at all, but Mumsnet is full of people who rather than argue for the status quo to be preserved and rules to be followed, are keen to needle OPs into thinking they are somehow the problem for not noticing the shift in society and putting up with it.

It's become a "what can I get away with?" society.

It’s a radical idea, but YANBU.

But if you wanted to talk, why wouldn’t you simply book one of the seven other coaches where noise is acceptable? Why sit in the one place where you are expected to be quiet?

You can talk in the quiet carriage. Just not loudly. It is not a silent carriage.
Also, people who struggle with noise might want to have a quiet chat too.
My DP is autistic and also struggles with noise, but he likes to talk too.

I am also autistic and avoid the quiet carriage for exactly this reason. It annoys me so much that they’re breaking the rules and I’d rather sit where they’re ‘allowed’ to make noise even though it’s irritating!

Noise cancelling headphones help.

I'm not the reason society is 'falling apart', but to be honest I don't think it IS falling apart.

I think travel is oversubscribed and hectic.

Other aspects of society are better than when I was younger.

We're not going to hell in a handcart yet.

Always tell the conductor when there are people being noisy in the Quiet Carriage.
Quiet talking is fine.

I would argue that “quiet talking” is not possible!

It has probably changed now but aeons ago when I last booked a train, you couldn't select "non quiet carriage" and it didn't tell you which carriage was the quiet one so I definitely ended up there by mistake at least once when I was travelling with DS1 who was a toddler at the time.

I found this just as annoying so I hope they have changed it now. Quiet carriage makes sense but only if everyone subscribes to it.

1. Talking is allowed in the quiet carriage
2. Transport is more oversubscribed than it used to be so it is more hectic overall.

They should be quieter spaces, but what are your options?

• report to the conductor
• sit elsewhere
• wear headphones/ignore
• confront directly

Personally I have no desire to confront directly!

I've been in the Quiet Carriage and not noticed it was the Quiet Carriage.

No you're wrong here. People have always been allowed to talk quietly in the quiet carriage, and quiet talking absolutely exists.

Hell no. It’s a quiet coach and the passengers in it should respect that

Indeed. See also signs saying "Dogs must be kept on short leads at all times (explanation give re wildlife in area)" which apparently have an extra bit, invisible to most people, which says "Except you - let your dog off lead as much as you like and if someone politely reminds you (people on the National Trust Longshaw estate last week, I'm especially talking to you), ignore them or give them a mouthful of abuse".

Years ago I was listening to music with headphones on in the quiet carriage and was asked by the conductor to turn it right down so there was no noise at all coming from my headphones, or change carriages because silence is expected.

TBH, if other people can hear the noise from your headphones then they are probably too loud, and not great for your hearing either.

That takes me back reserved seats no input on which carraige on a packed train which turned out to be in quiet carriage me and very young kids being quiet - and arsehole couple behind having a loud fit every time one of mine move a magazine page or whispered to me for a drink. Thankfully in end one other other passengers asked them to stop being pricks and to shut up themsleves as they were making way more noise than us.

Quite carraiges were mostly about forbidding phone calls and requiring silent electronic devices and conversations even at normal tones have never been forbidden.

Though on a recent trip I found myself in a quiet carraige jumped on first with seats and nearly everyone was having loud phone calls and playing music/games/phones with no headphones.

I have some horrifically nosiy train journeys recently and now carry noise cancelling headphones.

The thing about noise cancelling headphones, or anything else that stops you hearing what’s going on, is that it’s all too easy to miss announcements.

Almost every time the driver announces that a tube will be missing the next stop for some reason, someone in headphones will get up to get off there. Or if a tube is terminating early 🙄 there will be headphone wearers who keep sitting there while everyone else is getting off.