Anyone else find self care totally tedious?

[binnibonnieboo]

So much stuff needs doing just to keep ourselves going. Shower, wash hair, brush teeth, dry self, put on clean clothes. Every single day except maybe for hair washing. What a pain. I don't even wear make up or bother moisturising, but still find it so tedious. That's before we even do the feeding our bodies bit!

I thought you were going to say something like pedicures, manicures etc. Not having a basic wash!
But I agree, beyond the basics I get bored with it!

I am with you OP, it's all such a chore. And 100x more so now that I am pregnant. Even getting in the shower feels like such a huge pain and effort.

Totally tedious. I don't wear make up because of the bore of putting it on and the grind of taking it off.

I’m not remotely depressed but yes, I agree @binnibonnieboo.

For me the worst bit is brushing teeth. I always feel like “again!? I literally just did this!” It’s soooo boring.

Yes, I find self care totally tedious too and do it totally out of vanity. I look quite presentable if I make an effort (which is very time consuming) but look like I've been exhumed if I don't. I wish I'd never started to be honest.

I thought it was just me! It is all just sooo booooring.

I try and aim for clean and tidy, if I'm going out, but don't always achieve both.

WFH today and I still have my pyjamas on with a fleece over the top that has a bit of yesterday's dinner down it. I will avoid putting the camera on if I have any calls as I haven't brushed my hair.

Still haven't bushed my teeth or washed my face with my hands (which is the sum total of my skin care routine) in cold water, cold, because I cba to wait for the hot to come through.

I like feeling clean after a shower but drying is so boring, and clothes! I lived in Australia for a while and you could just have pants, crop top bra, a loose vest dress and bare feet, or flip flops if you were feeling fancy.

The only reason I like the winter in the UK is because I can wear baggy tops and don't need to bother with a bra.

Ugh. The thought of doing a hairstyle and make up and choosing an 'outfit' EVERY DAY! ...gives me the ick.

DH can get up, spend 2 mins in the shower, clean his teeth, get dressed and be ready to go in less than 10 mins. Looking and smelling great.

But me - well, my personal best is 43 mins, for shower, hair wash, dry/style hair, put on make up and get dressed. I do it every morning, because I look and feel better once I've done it, but boy do I wish I could do it quicker. But I can't. I sometimes feel trapped by my basic grooming needs!

The poster who said 'Twice a day' was talking about brushing her teeth, not showering.

If you only brush your teeth once a day, that's a problem.

I developed a chronic illness around 5 years ago and am chronically fatigued. Until then I didn’t realise how utterly draining all this shit it. I still manage to shower, do my skincare and clean my teeth properly every day, wash my hair every other day and wear make up when I need to, but cooking had to fall by the wayside a long time ago. I find all of it exhausting and it pisses me off that a large proportion of the little energy that I have these days has to go on keeping myself and my clothing clean. Before I was ill, it was just a minor inconvenience that I did without thinking of much, but now it’s almost everything an it’s infuriating.

I can cope with the usual daily stuff, it's the tasks that happen every few days, weekly etc that are a pain. Trim nails, clean ears, trim nose hair haha. How am I supposed to establish a routine for these?

I have very long, thick hair. It takes ages to wash out the shampoo and conditioner and to dry it.

Just thought I'd share that I have always been exactly as you described, and a friend recommended I watch some You Tube videos by a Canadian lady who goes by the name of Clutterbug. Can't recommend highly enough. I have finally got my shit together in my early 50s becauwe of this woman! I found her hard gping at first, but got used to her & I'm so glad I did. My house is now never messy, even qhen I'm at my lowest ebb, it's still under control and manageable.

Im amazed how many of you have this negative feeling about showering! It's just a few minutes that makes you feel and smell so much better. I dont see it as a chore at all! I only wash hair two or three times a week and I also like the sensation and benefit of clean hair that comes from that. I spend minimal time on all this, I definitely wouldn't classify it is self care, or a chore its just a quick bit of the day?

Tbf showering/hair wash is the only thing I do daily no matter want as long as I’m clean, the rest of it is just a waste of time

There's a lot of "self care" that's actually more aimed to how you look, which is more to impress other people than it is to make you feel better. As I've got older, I've done less and less of what you might term "self care". There's no need to wash your hair every day, shave every day, moisturise every day etc. I do it when it will make me FEEL good, not just to LOOK good for other people.

Of course the basics such as teeth brushing and making sure I don't smell are always taken care of. But you don't have to put every item of clothing in the wash after one wear. People are so wasteful it's unreal.

Apart from the shower and hair wash I would agree with you. I’m paranoid about smelling so it’s non-negotiable, but we are sold the myth that it makes us feel better when it’s more likely that any good feeling is down to thinking you look good for other people

As you have established you are not really referring to ‘ self care ‘ but the things you have to do to maintain a basic standard of personal hygiene.

I could stand in a hot shower for 15 mins exfoliating, clarifying, tweezing and plucking but if you were to strip back all my shower rituals considered self care then I too would find the daily requirement of getting wet, then getting dry tediously boring too.

I have absolutely no idea what "self care" is.
If you mean washing regularly and washing your hair, cleaning your teeth twice a day, ensuring that you change your underclothes and socks regularly, is this not just normal behaviour that most people do?
If I am missing something, do, please, tell me!

Why do people not shower before bed when they’ve been active all day, often outside, sweaty?

Because most people don’t get that filthy and sweaty during the day.

Nighttime is different though - What about the ones who shower only at night and so go out the next day having not removed all the sweat and skin flakes?

Gosh I don't iron....ever? Maybe a shirt for wedding or something. I don't know how people find the time. Can you sack it off?

Yes that is what I mean, the routine everyday tasks to keep us clean and presentable. I hate them.

Yes, it's that feeling of, not this again, surely I just did that this morning? And I have to do it again tomorrow?

I guess most men don’t have hair that takes 40 mins to diffuse dry though like mine
it’s not optional, it’s already only shoulder length but my hair is curly and it takes a lot longer than if you can just blast it dry

I said upthread that it takes me 43 minutes (I have worked hard to get this down) to shower, moisture, dry/style hair,
put on a bit of make-up, clean teeth and get dressed. This is my morning routine and I look and feel rubbish without it. I can totally understand how it takes @JLou08 an hour if she has long curly hair.

But I really wish it didn’t take me so long and I guess @JLou08 has similar thoughts about her routine!