I want to get off benefits

[peanutbutterjelly563]

But how?

I work full time. I went to university. I ended up a single parent.

I get a universal credit top up. 2 children still fairly young so still paying childcare.

I am nearly 40.

Since getting universal credit, I feel like a criminal sometimes. I’ve just had to pay £50 for a letter from the GP (which I can’t afford) to prove one of my children live with me because they were doing a compliance check. All of my children have always lived with me, and do see their Dad but I’ve always been the main carer and I have a lives with order from the court. They wouldn’t accept that as it’s over 3 years old. They wouldn’t accept child benefit letter either.

I don’t want to be getting any benefits anymore, but I can’t afford to live without them. I earn about 30k a year. I’ve tried applying for other jobs. Most with my skill set pay the same or less than what I earn now.

Any ideas. AIBU to think this is possible?

What did you do at university and what is your job now? £30k is below the average wage, especially for a 40 year old, so maybe there could be opportunities to go in to something else?

Does their dad help with the childcare costs?

Sounds like the experience of the letter made you feel guilty? If so, DON’T! You’re educated, working hard and parenting. You’re very entitled to your UC. I’m sure some high flying types here will offer some good advice about CVs and linked in and what-not but I think you’re doing just fine.

I studied social work but I couldn’t cope with the work, I now do safeguarding in schools. I don’t know what other careers I could do with my skills which pay more.

He pays £200 a month CMS.

What job do you do? Are there any opportunities for moving into a managerial role or doing some further training within the workplace?

If you already work in school what about training to become a teacher? Teachers start on £33k so you wouldn’t have to take a pay cut, and salaries go up to £45k even on the main pay scale with opportunities to go higher with the upper pay scales. There are on the job training options for it too.

It makes me so mad. Why is he only providing £200 measly quid!! The government left having to step in and provide for his children!!

How much benefits are you in reciept of?

Don't feel guilty, it took me a long time to get out of the benefits system and even now I'm being made redundant again so may be at risk of needing them again if I can't find a job in a tight market or need to take a paycut. People really underestimate how hard it is when you have small children to come out of the system and just how much money you don't have.
I'm looking a starting up my own side hustle to bring in extra money.

I feel similar. Also earn about £30k but my issue is I don't have the confidence to cope with a better paid job. I'd like to think I'm an intelligent woman but I'm also just a bit pathetic. I hate not being able to better myself and my financial position.

Tell me about it. He’s self employed so I’m lucky to even get that.

I’ve thought about this but I can’t explain why, I just don’t feel like I would cope with it very well. Also don’t feel intelligent enough to teach any subject. Maybe Primary I could consider. I’m not putting up barriers but working in a school makes me feel I wouldn’t be a good teacher.

That’s awful that they made you £50 worse off. A child benefit letter should have been enough imo. Or a child maintenance letter.

I’ve heard in the last few years some people have to take photos of themselves putting the keys in their front doors to prove where they live. I can understand why you want to get out of it. Don’t feel guilty though.

You're entitled to the benefits - that's why they are there. To support you while the kids are small. The time you waste feeling bad is time you take away from your kids - so stop it.
Life changes. They won't always be small and then you'll be earning and paying more tax.

The words you are looking for are ‘pay his share’

It’s not help. Language matters.

Oh turn it in, the OP knew exactly what I meant 🙄

You are working. So you are not totally reliant. Develop a side hustle business so when kids leave home you can cover your costs?

Tact matters.

This is the side of benefits that people don't appreciate. I'm also stuck on UC top ups (in my case due to having disabled children so working part time) and it's horrible.

I've just recently had my second audit. They can do this at any time randomly and go through 3 months of all accounts in fine detail. Then you get an interview to ask questions about transactions. I appreciate it's needed to stop fraudulent claims but its embarrassing feeling you need to explain spending. I also had to send photo of my face, my passport and me holding my passport.

I've had two audits in two years which were both standard ones (I e. Not due to suspected fraud).

If you’re in a schools safeguarding role there may be ways to progress. Many MATs have safeguarding staff working at a high level, on good salaries. Your social work qualification will open doors for you too in third sector organisations. Not all social work is high tariff statutory work.

It's also (for good teachers) quite long hours/work at home. Not ideal as a single parent with young kids & only really works at all if you are in the same area, with the same holiday dates, as you own kids.

How much more do you need to earn to drop the benefits?

have you asked their Dad to contribute mire? Pay for certain things?

Have a look on your local county council website for vacancies, lots of jobs around education, safeguarding, ehcps, etc… you’ll have loads of transferable skills within children’s services and it’s not all at the front line of children’s social work…

Annoying administrational hoop to jump through. Unfair you’re £50 down. But you don’t need to turn your life upside down right now. With young kids and keeping a house and full time job going, you’re doing well. You’re entitled to that UC top up and don’t feel badly about it. Anyone’s situation can change at any time.

Keep going as you are for now. And explore a new career route if and when it works for you and your family. You’re already working very hard.

You're working full time... therefore imo you're not the problem. The problem is the shitty wages in this country which means working full time doesn't bring in enough money to support a family.