What’s wrong with me, hospital clueless

[elm26]

Yesterday at 1pm, I put my 6 month old on the rug with his toys and went for a wee.

As I was walking back I had a sudden severe pain in my right side radiating into my lower back and up to my shoulder, I was in agony.

I called DH who was luckily only on a job 15 mins away, he came straight home and took one look at me and called ambulance, I was shouting out in pain they gave me gas and air and morphine.

I had an emergency CT when dye last night and also have a catheter as lost the ability to wee. Nothing showed on CT, they got me settled on morphine and today I’ve had a transvaginal scan which shows ovaries and womb look normal.

Gynae can’t find a reason so they’ve stopped painkillers and just giving me paracetamol but somethings wrong I feel like somebody’s twisting my insides. The gynae consultant was horrible and said the surgical team will come see me if they think it’s worth it?? So I’m waiting for that if they come.

I’m in so much pain and genuinely scared they’ll send me home not knowing what is wrong with me.

Has anyone has anything similar?

I’ve had something very similar and it was endo on the bladder and bowel. My worst flares were soon after going for a pee, just randomly. I passed out, I couldn’t stand, I vomited, the pain was tremendous. Nothing to see on CT scan or ultrasound.

Medical misogyny.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2026/mar/08/nhs-letting-women-down-medical-misogyny-report

This actually references feedback via this forum.
Easily google-able.

And the evidence is where exactly? While you dig it out I'll ask my DinL who is an Obs & Gynae surgeon.

Could it be slipped disc?

No…..you’re probably right NosejobNelly. Having read a bit further down, sounds like the consensus seems to be that likely a renal/gallbladder problem. Know my husband passed a kidney stone a few years ago and pain was so bad, he went into shock. And Cholecystits/gallstones are also meant to be agony. Definitely think OP should stand her ground and insist these other potential causes be excluded before being discharged.

How strange, Last year, my leg went from under me, making me collapse, at the same time as a shooting pain went up my spine. The doctor said it was caused by lack of vitamins/poor nutrition!

Do you have diarrhea every night bc you're on weight loss meds? Substantial weight loss can trigger gallstones esp if you've had kids. I suffered horribly for months (intermittent sudden bouts of excruciating pain in right side so bad it would make me vomit) until mine were diagnosed then a simple surgery to remove gall bladder and I'm good as new x

She had a CT scan of her abdomen with contrast. This would have shown any kidney stones, gallstones or any significant cholecystitis, pancreatitis, pyelonephritis, any bowel obstruction or perforation etc. Blood tests were also done.

Oh well you must be right then

I attempted this with one of my clients which is why Im talking from experience, the people on the ground clearly dont agree with you. We were (virtually) laughed out of the ward, but it wasnt taken seriously at all, in similar (not identical) circumstances, patient not great, but not deteriorating and can be managed at home

OP will come back no doubt and say this worked yes?

Endometriosis is the most obvious one. I’ve never seen a man left crying and screaming in pain for a decade, on morphine and told it’s just how periods are
There’s also been more studies into male pattern baldness than endo, and it says everything that one study was how attractive endo sufferers are

then there’s the heart attack gender gap
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/understanding-heart-attack-gender-gap-201604159495

This is more up to date
https://www.bhf.org.uk/what-we-do/news-from-the-bhf/news-archive/2019/september/heart-attack-gender-gap-is-costing-womens-lives

Here’s a report on gynae issues
https://committees.parliament.uk/committee/328/women-and-equalities-committee/news/204316/medical-misogyny-is-leaving-women-in-unnecessary-pain-and-undiagnosed-for-years/

Here’s a report including Mumsnet
https://www.theguardian.com/society/2026/mar/08/nhs-letting-women-down-medical-misogyny-report

A BMJ report because coil fitting never routinely had pain relief until my friend fought for it

https://www.bmj.com/content/390/bmj.r1234.full

Here’s one with some links, it wasn’t mandatory in the US to include women in clinic trials until 1993
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-07-27/women-share-experiences-with-medical-misogyny-in-australia/104034918

i mean I could go on with talking about pain relief for hysteroscopy, descriptions of “discomfort so take a paracetamol beforehand” and exactly how I nearly lost my job over endometriosis and being told to take the pill as they couldn’t do anything else but these are a good start

Possibly gallbladder. Classic symptom of choleocystitis is right side upper abdominal pain just under liver that radiates to the right should blade area

Oh sorry I didn’t do racial bias

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4638275/

https://www.bmj.com/content/378/bmj.o2337

Black women 4 x more likely to die in childbirth
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-59248345

Discussion of why
https://www.bmj.com/content/388/bmj.r226

More serious birth complications
https://www.theguardian.com/society/2024/apr/08/black-women-in-england-suffer-more-serious-birth-complications-analysis-finds

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2024/feb/04/misogyny-and-racial-bias-routinely-putting-patients-at-risk-in-england-warns-nhs-safety-chief

• Martha's Rule (England): Being rolled out from April 2024, this allows patients, families, and staff to request a rapid review by a separate critical care team if they are concerned a patient’s condition is not improving or being taken seriously.

This 👆 💯
Get blood infection markers checked and also get them to check your bowel. It could have an infection or be twisted in a certain area.
I know of different people this has happened to and it wasn't pretty, but bloody painful.

Hope you're okay OP @elm26

Which hospital are you in? If they discharge you then go to the A&E of a teaching hospital

I would bloody well hope so, yes

The aim is to make care safer, and we have been VERY clear that if that means additional reviews then so be it

I would strongly advise that, if you feel that you are not taken seriously, then you escalate as needed. I’ve had one recently that needed urgent OOH attention and was sent to the director on call, who then made the necessary arrangements with CC outreach. However, this is very much an exception to the norm. I’m sorry if your experience hasn’t been helpful, but that doesn’t mean that’s the case across the board

While you don’t owe anyone an update, I just wanted to say that I hope you’re okay, OP. I hate knowing someone else is in so much pain and there’s nothing any of us can do to practically help. I’m hoping that your silence is because you are finally getting the medical care that you need, though I really, really hope you didn’t have to worsen to get it. When I was in hospital in January, there was a woman across from me who had been to the hospital in terrible pain for a week; they couldn’t find any cause so sent her home. She went home, terrible pain for a few more days, and then she actually lost consciousness and her teenager called 999. Back she goes to hospital and now a scan shows that part of her spleen lost blood supply and the issue was only visible on scans at that point. I guess this random story is hopefully a good distraction! And the point of it is to say, please don’t doubt yourself. You know your body. Very, very best of luck.

I hope you are okay OP

Go to a different district and hospital just say you are on holiday.
Good Luck 🤞 💐

Wow, it sounds like you've had an awful time in hospital (during a painful and traumatic time when you needed care and support!!). Do you have a supportive GP who you can discuss this with or could you contact PALS?

Are you in a position to pay for or raise money to see someone privately?

Also I agree with @FFSToEverythingSince2020 , you know something is wrong so don't give up until you have an answer.

Could be a hernia even trapped nerve sound awful but those things are

Wow, I cannot believe the lack of acknowledgment of your level of pain
I had similar symptoms, but not the changing to a dull ache
I was screaming in pain, had to curl in a ball when attempting to walk somewhere
had all the tests. completely dismissed and belittled by 111 and out of hours. Basically what do you expect us to do
I have had 3 big babies without epidural, smashed my elbow joint, with my bones sticking out

this pain was much worse and I was absolutely terrified of it

not had it since early January, I think now it was a twisted ovarian cyst, I really hope it doesn’t return and I have every camaraderie with your experience of pain being belittled and dismissed

I know what it is. I’m merely saying that a number of conditions can cause a raised CA125. These include endometriosis, fibroids, inflammation and even menstruation. It is of little value as a stand-alone diagnostic.

Starting with a BBC article because it's a good introduction to the subject:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/future/article/20180518-the-inequality-in-how-women-are-treated-for-pain

A short article in the BJN:
https://www.britishjournalofnursing.com/content/editorial/women-and-pain

A piece in the Wellbeing of Women:
https://www.wellbeingofwomen.org.uk/news/over-half-of-uk-women-feel-their-pain-is-ignored-or-dismissed-new-report-shows/

See also the Journal of Pain:
https://www.jpain.org/article/S1526-5900(24)00480-2/fulltext

The Lancet:
https://www.wellbeingofwomen.org.uk/news/over-half-of-uk-women-feel-their-pain-is-ignored-or-dismissed-new-report-shows/
...with this notable paragraph:
"Women are more likely to encounter scepticism regarding the severity or legitimacy of their symptoms as a result of gender biases and cultural norms ingrained in the medical discourse about women’s bodies and diseases over centuries. These beliefs can contribute to health-care professionals downplaying or attributing women's pain to psychological factors or hormonal fluctuations rather than addressing its underlying medical conditions."

Harvard Health Publishing:
https://www.health.harvard.edu/pain/the-dangerous-dismissal-of-womens-pain

This is just a starter-for-10. Medical misogyny is not only real, but well recognised within the scientific and medical communities, even though it remains prevalent.

It goes further than that though. Did you know the extent to which the world has been designed around men?

Until, I believe, relatively recently, car crash dummies were modelled on the male figure - height, weight and proportions - which mean that crash tests are passed when they would otherwise fail had the test modelled women's bodies.

Body armour, worn by those serving in the armed forces and police, has been designed to fit the male body, not female. Ask women who serve whether the stab vests they've been given fit correctly, or comfortably.

Men not women tend to be used for testing medicines, which mean doses and potency has been based on male height, weight and metabolism.

Anecdotally, you don't have to survey women widely to find numerous accounts of medical misogyny. These aren't vague and assumptive such as, "I was writhing in pain and sent home with paracetamol", but legitimate serious and life threatening health problems and medical emergencies. Or accounts of men and women being given totally different pain relief for the same presenting complaint - OTC for the woman, adequate pain relief for the man, and this is alluded to in one of the links I've provided above.

A relatively cursory search here on mumsnet will bring up dozens of accounts of women being forced to undergo painful medical procedures without any aneasthetic at all.

I'm really don't understand why you appear to be so affronted at the idea of medical misogyny?