I am so sick of hearing about menopause

[haveyouheardthemenopauseisshit]

I get the menopause is a big deal for many women and the symptoms are not nice.

However, do we have to talk about it all the time? I feel like I am hearing about it multiple times a day. We have menopause awareness sessions and e-learning at work. I’m targeted by advertising every time I look at my phone for some new product / vitamin / book etc which is supposed to help with menopause symptoms. I feel like it’s constantly being mentioned on the radio, TV, by people I know.

If someone is forgetful, it’s the menopause. If they’re tired, it’s the menopause. If they’re angry, it’s the menopause. If they’re hot, it’s the menopause.

I’m 39 and I feel bombarded by all of this “THE MENOPAUSE IS COMING SOON AND IT WILL BE SHIT” messaging.

I am also a bit worried that it will make it even harder to be taken seriously as a woman in the workplace, since the prevailing message now seems to be that women over 45 are basically useless because of all the issues caused by their hormones.

I’m guessing I’ll be in the minority here and everyone else will think that the awareness raising is a good thing but I just find it quite depressing!

I am post menopause.
When I started with peri about 15 years ago, it wasn’t a thing and I had so many symptoms.
I thought I was going mad. Given anti depressants which did nothing.
I would have loved more information.
However there is a HUGE difference between decent information and the ENDLESS monetisation of it.
There are so many products on sale around it, and the podcasts, I just can’t. An endless array of celebrities with money charting their journeys. Then trying to flog me collagen or red light face masks.
It is important that workplaces have education.
My only advice? If you feel more than a few symptoms which signify perimenopause, if you can afford, pay. I paid to see a menopause specialist nurse (half the price of a consultant!) she spent an hour with me.
Then once I was given my HRT she sent a report to my GP who then allowed me to have the prescription. I see the same nurse once a year for an MOT.
Don’t dread it, it’s another phase in life. As I had endo most of my adult life the no periods is the best gift, ever.

They should - take the fear away a bit

BUT there is a difference between saying for example ‘ I had a lovey easy natural birth but I totally understand the need for information on c sections and birth trauma’ and ‘I had such an easy natural birth so why do people bang on about c sections and birth trauma’

I get you don’t need the information but not sure why other people having it is an issue

This will pass but I’m glad work are more accommodating because of the higher profile.

Unfortunately, for some women, a higher profile at work just means they feel that their workplace considers menopausal women to be everywhere. Even women of childbearing age are also potentially menopausal. Menopausal women will be irrational, take more sick days, become more emotional at work, make less reliable decisions, forget what they're doing, etc.

At least in the past, they just felt sorry for the husbands.

Because it undermines all women by making us seem like basketcases on the edge and in need of extra special measures

Which is annoying

Hi Grey yes I agree that we need balance in the conversation, absolutely. And I’m up for talking about different experiences but find my lower tolerance these days > that’ll be the Peri 😂 < is tested by others declaring, It’s Totally Natural Therefore No Big Deal

Oh come on men who wanted to undermine us would find other ways to do so if not menopause!

they’ve done it for years over periods and childbirth

I'm declaring that it's NOT natural but is mass hysteria to a large extent, if this helps

I think you'll be waiting a while. Most people tune out stuff that doesn't interest them.

Am I glad information is available, doctors are becoming more knowledgeable and it’s not a taboo to talk about? Yes.

But I too am sick of hearing about it so much. The posts I see on here where posters report being openly disbelieved if they don’t have symptoms or the obsession with diagnosing any problem a woman over 35 has as peri is ridiculous and frustrating. I saw a woman fed up with her useless-sounding OH be told ‘you’re peri! Of course you hate him!’ It’s like over a certain age everything you are and do is read through the lens of menopause for some people. How it helps women - regardless of how much they’re struggling with this transition - to be seen this way, I don’t understand.

I also see more and more the ‘just you wait’ comments, which are just horrible.

The comparisons with pregnancy are off IMO. I don’t have kids and I’m actually pretty clueless about it. I haven’t experienced serious menopause symptoms and have had no treatment for it, but feel VERY well versed in it.

No, men definitely hear the stuff about us all being broken lost causes.

It is infuriating that we can't express any negative experience without some keen bean leaping in with peri. Lucky peri didn't exist when women were protesting for equal pay.

So what you're saying here is "If your lived experience of menopause isn't exactly the same as mine, your menopause experience doesn't count."

🤔

LOL wait until it gets ya!

I mocked.

I now know better.

Some will sail through without a second thought...others would prefer to choose one of Dantes circles of hell.

We've always been reduced to our biology, look at the word 'hysteria' and where it comes from.

I’m fed up with people urging HRT when there are a significant group of women who can’t have HRT due to previous hormone-linked cancer. As one of these women, it’s discouraging to see so many others saying they wouldn’t have survived without HRT.

I don’t agree that menopause shouldn’t be a topic for discussion.

See, you're part of the problem. "Wait until it gets ya". And you can't actually know how much is "it" and how much is the psychological priming you've received.

Sorry to hear you're not doing well for whatever reason but please don't be bitter about the diversity of human experience as a result.

I believe that “Menopause” awareness only became a thing when somebody (probably a man) realised how much money could be made from it.

Do we also have to discuss eg prostates tho? Cos I don't wanna.

I'm not bitter.

It's also not human experience, it's female experience.

If you think I'm the problem? If only.

"Mother" Nature fucks up womens hormones, not a random poster on MN.

I agree completely but I'm a bit biased. I have been in a medical menopause as part of breast cancer treatment for the last 5 years, diagnosed at 35. I would have given my right arm to go through peri and menopause at the correct age. I see it as a privilege

I feel the same to a degree. I’ve only really got back into the swing of things now my small children are primary age and all the messaging is ‘it’s all going to go to shit again soon’. Awareness is good and I’d rather have information but it sometimes feels relentlessly negative.

Yes I think people like you make life worse for everyone by threatening your own bad experiences for everyone who comes after you, like a curse.

Some people will need to deal with issues when they arise. It's so utterly rude to insist everyone else has the same problems and will be unable to function normally as a result.

Comments like "LOL wait until it gets ya!" is what OP is talking about I think.

Not all women suffer badly.

It's akin to "Ha ha, you wait until you have kids, THEN you won't be so slim".
Many women return to pre-pregnancy size.

Awareness and openness is great, don't get me wrong, but not all women have a terrible time and not every single woe (emotional or physical) you get from the age of 35 till death is due to menopause.

Ah, now as a daughter of a man who died with prostate cancer and a wife of another having treatment - what would you like to know..?

Weirdly, focused, calm and in control isn't the impression you're making on this thread.

God i remember being in a bar restaurant with some friends when we were 21. One was looking at herself in the mirror and this random older woman came over from the sinks to say "just wait until you have babies, you won't be so slim then" and left.

In my awful self centred young person way I remember being out out she apparently didn't think I was slim enough to harass 🤣

Anyway yes it is the same nasty energy.