AIBU to dread DH working from home with a toddler underfoot?

[headacheandtired]

DH normally works in the office Tuesdays - Thursdays, or is visiting clients. He’s out of the house, anyway!

However, he’s torn a muscle and it’s been recommended he tries to avoid driving for a period of time, so he’s negotiated working from home during this period.

It’s so difficult. I’m dreading today and tomorrow a bit as we have a two year old and obviously she doesn’t really understand that daddy is working so can’t play in the garden with her etc so keeps trying to get to him and then getting upset and having a tantrum when she can’t. It’s pretty miserable to be honest. I’m just praying that he’s back in the office when the Easter holidays begin!

I feel like I’m just repeating myself now 😂 I personally don’t think it’s a big ask, I’m aware it’s his home too (obviously?! 😂) but again, it takes all sorts. I’m aware not everyone will agree. I don’t know what else to say!

His home too, yes. But his child, too. His wife looking after his child, him making it a bit easier for her? No, I don't think it's a big ask, and it's only for a short time while he's WFH.

Back when we had a toddler still, I worked in the house 1 day a week when DH was off work looking after said toddler. We both knew that it was going to be a pain in the arse for all concerned if she knew I was available, so we worked to make sure it wasn't going to happen. I didn't want a screeching shitfit any more than he did.

That meant background noise, a routine involving him getting her out of the house in the mornings and me taking care over where I went otherwise- I would work upstairs and they'd be downstairs. He also did the school run for older DC and took toddler alongside, so that was more structure too.

Basically the answer was planning and some give and take.

Thanks, all.

She never used to be too fussed about Daddy: could sort of take or leave him but in the past couple of weeks she has been saying ‘I want daddy; I want daddy!’ a lot!

Toddlers do vary a lot in what they will sort of ‘accept’ at any one time; she can be very stubborn and so I know it’s a challenge having DH around as she will just keep trying to get to him and drag him out (literally) to the garden! We’ll just have to try to muddle through as best we can.

Where's he sitting to work? Dh worked at home a lot when ours were little and we found it best if he was upstairs and we were mainly downstairs. (We actually had a loft room and that was the best place)

He put a little hook and eye lock up high on the back of the door to stop exuberant youngsters letting themselves in mid client call 🤣 My friends used to joke about that bloke you keep locked in your attic 🤣

Also can he use the time he's saving by not commuting to spend some extra time with your little one? That might help.

I'm not sure of the house set up, but if you need to be in/have run out of being "out" then I'd try and stick to a different floor. Have toys in her bedroom instead of the living room/kitchen, read books, mine used to love a middle of the day bath and I'd throw some little plastic gen things in there for them to "treasure hunt". Just generally keeping her busy. If she knows daddy is there and can't be distracted, focus activities on him "shall we paint a picture for daddy to show him at lunchtime" or "we can't speak to him now but let's make biscuits for our dinner time when daddy will be with us". Ask him to also think about it, e.g. schedule some breaks when he can play or have lunch together every day, and ensure he doesn't just pop out, wave and go again as that used to drive my toddler wild with anger. It's definitely do-able (I say this as someone who went through covid with a husband, 2.5 yr old and 5 year old doing home schooling - be grateful for the soft play!)
Hopefully now the weather is picking up a bit you can get out lots too even if its just a walk to the park.

My husband WFH and I'm off with our toddler, he just knows daddy is here but working and he'll come out at "x" time (his lunch break) to play etc.

As its unusual for your husband to be home in the day why not make a clock picture with segments where daddy can play and daddy can't, so your daughter isn't always asking to see him? Just a simple pie chart style thing?