To ask you to help with a cover story for my Jewish child

[Aislyn]

My eldest is at secondary school and has suffered horrific racist bullying due to being identifiably Jewish. She never told anyone, but they guessed due to her appearance, and her saying Eastern European countries when asked 'where are you from?'

Unfortunately the school has been completely unhelpful, and refused to tackle this.

My second child is starting at second and has sen. They are at even higher risk of bullying. They have an appearance that would mean that they could be identified as Jewish, especially when citing Eastern European countries in response to the above question. Can anyone think of a cover story for my child?

(Yes, I have tried to get them a place at a Jewish school, but there is none available)

My kids went to a pretty homogeneous English school and at pick up I could easily pick them out because almost all the children had dark blonde/ light brown hair and fair skin! THATS what “ looking British” is. It’s not a value judgement, just a fact.

This makes zero sense.

I’m not sure what there is to investigate that requires a 14 month suspension.

She posted all this hatred on a public Twitter account and has continued doing so after being suspended. To the point she has been arrested four times due to the extremity of what she is coming out with.

The article I read says she was given a 15 month suspension whilst they investigate.

The article I read says she was given a 15 month suspension whilst they investigate.

As the OP has said numerous times, it’s the school kids not accepting “London” as an answer, not the OP.

i haven’t got any answers OP but I’m sorry that you are going through this.

Oh come on. The onus is now on you to highlight what you're having difficulty with as it's far from clear

It’s far from clear for me too.

How does she easily pick out her children if almost all the kids have dark blonde hair and fair skin?

Is it because they’re her kids?

But everyone can pick out their own kids?

I just assumed she meant she had dark haired/skinned kids - am I wrong? In which case I absolutely take back my remark

Maybe. I just didn’t get it.

Absolutely. I don't know why some people are being so obtuse on this point.

The easiest solution is unfortunately that she just has to keep saying “I am from London, my parents are from London and I don’t have any other heritage that I know of”.

As I mentioned upthread, DH may have non-British ancestry but he might not, and if he does, he doesn’t know what it is. He did used to get asked “where are you from, no where are you really from” both by racists and by non-white kids who assumed he was mixed race. He did just have to keep saying he was British, until they got bored of it. There wasn’t another answer he could have given that would have shut them up.

Thank you. I appreciate your suggestion and maybe this is that solution until boredom ensues. Others have suggested some open ended response, like saying they don't know partially due to adoption of a parent/grandparent. A lie but not one that could be found out so easily

@twelvepiecesofflair can you clarify? 🤔

To be fair it's gotten confusing between what has happened which is that her older child has sadly faced antisemitism due to their classmates identifying them as Jewish because when asked there they're from they said eastern European countries. Unless I've misread, OP hasn't said her child has tried to say they're from London and the kids have kept pushing, and saying they don't look British, this is all what she is presuming will happen with her other child at a totally different school, so everyone getting crossed lines between what kids have actually done Vs OPs assumed response to people suggesting they don't indulge conversations about heritage any further than the place they live and to report anyone pushing it.

This was my suggestion on page one of this thread. London is the answer. Pure and simple.

I think people are forgetting that it’s kids we are talking about. A lot of examples how to handle the situation are suitable for adults but not for 13 y.o.
I was mistakenly thought at first that OP’s children were born somewhere and then moved to London but she clarified that they were born here. In this situation I think those who ask - ask maliciously, there is no accent or language issue indicating immigration. Those who ask suspect the answer.

There is a possibility of cover story but it should be tailored in details to OP’s situation and ability of her youngest child to communicate it. Vague answers won’t be suitable because in a way it’s a very simple question.
Someone up the thread asked if adults who picked up children looked Jewish. It’s absolutely relevant as well.
I have Jewish heritage myself but I don’t look Jewish however my mum, my aunt and my cousin are.
Every time I was with them the question arised and it was stupid to deny that my family had Jewish heritage. I was never questioned when I was on my own or with my Dad/ his side of the relatives.

@pizzaHeart - "I think people are forgetting that it’s kids we are talking about. A lot of examples how to handle the situation are suitable for adults but not for 13 y.o.
I was mistakenly thought at first that OP’s children were born somewhere and then moved to London but she clarified that they were born here. In this situation I think those who ask - ask maliciously, there is no accent or language issue indicating immigration. Those who ask suspect the answer..."

This ^

I'm amazed at the number of posters who seem to think that the OP's child is participating in a civilised and rational conversation with sensible people - rather than with school bullies who are looking to intimidate and for whom any answer will be the "wrong" answer.

How utterly depressing that 60% of 18 - 24 year olds think that Israel is treating Palestinians in the same way as Nazis treated the Jews in the Holocaust.

Say they are from your town you live in now.

My partner is Jewish and identifiable as such but has the thickest north London accent you could imagine, upon being asked, and its daily, and its tiresome, where he is from, he replied with a rather loud “You what mate????” That any eastenders cast member sould be proud of.
Kindness to you and your children ❤️

As someone with several Jewish friends and colleagues who all look completely different, I’m genuinely intrigued by the idea that secular Jewish people are easily identifiable. How so? I manage two Jewish men. One has a Spanish surname and the other a common British one. I interviewed the latter and had no idea whatsoever he was Jewish until I offered him the job and HR informed me he needed to work a half day on Fridays. The other guy volunteered the information to me on passing. They look completely dissimilar. I actually find it a bit troubling that people promote the idea of a Jewish ‘look’.

Why is it troubling?

Jewish people are an ethnic group and like other ethnic groups, they have common features often. That isn't anti Semitic. What is anti Semitic is when those features are mocked.
Arab people are an ethnic group. They often have prominent noses, dark hair and eyes and darker skin. It's not anti-Arab to say that.

Italian people are an ethnic group. They often have prominent noses, dark hair, olive skin. It's not anti-Italian to say that

This reminds me of the controversy over the Leonard Bernstein biopic Marstro. Hadley Freeman has an intetesting column.

https://www.thetimes.com/culture/tv-radio/article/what-a-song-and-dance-over-a-giant-schnozz-mfgdpk695#:~:text=The%20trailer%20for%20Maestro%2C%20Bradley%20Cooper's%20film,lot%20of%20feelings%20in%20a%20lot%20of

Why is it troubling for people of an ethnic group to talk about how they look? I am not sure why you would have difficulty with me describing how my children look, or what they have experienced (that people identify them as Jewish based on appearance).

FFS. If the child is from Israel they should absolutely be able to say they are from Israel. So sick of this nonsense blaming ordinary citizens for the actions of governments. I have family in Israel and they were going on weekly protests about Netanyahu, i.e. doing something actually meaningful in their own country, long before any virtue signalling Brits decided it was fashionable to post Palestinian flags every day on their Instagram stories while ignoring every other global atrocity that isn’t the cause du jour. Seriously, fuck the lot of you. Your pretence to moral authority is a joke.

I find it troubling how many people don't understand the difference between saying that all people of Jewish faith look some way (no-one is saying that) and that many people with a specific look are (ashkenazi) jews - as an ethnic group which is recognisable to some extent.

Ethnic groups do exist. It's wrong to generalise about someone's personality from ethnicity, but it's similarly wrong to pretend it doesn't exist. For example NHS runs different screening programs focused on different ethnic groups, because the statistical risks differs among them.